Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clark, scotts and rogers)
Detail of the painting “God reprimanding Adam and Eve”, by F. Zampieri (1625)
Yeah, you are correct. You have scene the image above before. In one of our Unicorn Challenge posts. Superstition is the religion of the desperately unimaginative.
That being said, you do know what Friday means: ‘the Unicorn Challenge‘., do you not? It is the day-of-the-week when jenne and ceayr go all ‘June and Ward Cleaver’ on the blogosphere and invite a small group of talented writers to get al TAT on the photo below.
Anyway. Two Hundred fifty words is what they allow us to write a story keying off the photo below.
Yeah? Well, no matter what that old saying, choice is curse of the Garden.
The man stood on the rock. The wind was calm, the sea was flat. The sky was a uniform, overcast grey; so much so, there was no horizon. Anywhere. In any direction, except landwards. The man had zero interest in that direction.
When there is no horizon, only gravity can provide direction. Taking the hint from this most fundamental of forces, the man looked down. Without a bright sun overhead, jealously casting reflections on anything it felt threatened by, he could see to the bottom. Like most of his world this particular morning, it consisted of unexceptional variations on the shade of grey. The exception to this almost blankscape were three red stars.
A phrase from a proverb, long favored by nuns charged with instilling the moral guilt demanded by Mother Church of it’s youngest, came, quite unbidden, “Well I made a difference to that one’.
The man laughed and nearly lost his balance. He noticed his rock pedestal was smaller. Time and Tide, he mused, time and tide.
Feeling his resolve recede, he glanced over the increasing gap between his stand and dry land. Let go, he thought.
On the shore, a boy’s voice met his thought, “Let go! I’ll throw” Childish laughter and wagging tail wrote a couplet of love and innocence as young human and ageless canine played on the beach.
He stepped into the ocean betting that solid land would welcome him.
*
About clarkscottroger
Excellent piece of writing, mon vieux, leaving this reader smiling through a frown, unsure of your MC’s (final?) intention…
(as always thanks for the feedback.)*
*between you and me, I agree but given the lengthy sequence of drafts, I feel good about it. You came to mind at a certain point when I had a beginning and an end… ‘make this a story with an ending that resolves the beginning’… in the tug of war between imagery and narrative, the former has the upper hand. but, that being said, while I don’t yet have an on-off switch for writing styles…yet, I continue to make progress
Your Beavering intro gave no clue to the philosophical depth of your story. These gems will stick long in my mind.
‘When there is no horizon, only gravity can provide direction.’
‘Childish laughter and wagging tail wrote a couplet of love and innocence as young human and ageless canine played on the beach.’
lol
thank you, Doug
another! another new word (see reply to Misky below) this aspect of blogging i.e. exposure to new views/ideas/crazy-ass pun posts… makes the price of effort (to write online) way worth it!
Ah …. found myself in the midst of the comfortably familiar and exciting tales we’ve grown up with, our Jack London and Eric Knight books grasped tightly in our hands, and fabulous dreams at end of day after an adventure on the beach with a best friend. Grand storytelling, Clark.
ty, SS!
“A difference to that one.” Oof.
Excellent story.
thank you, Miz M
This is marvellous. I see what you mean about our stories having some common ground – both our settings are horizonless and somewhat disorienting. Your character’s change of mood moves in so subtly and gently. I really like how you’ve used the child and dog to draw the MC back towards the land that ‘would welcome him’, and I presume, life. So good.
there is something about the group jenne and ceayr have gathered. nothing as simple as ‘like minds’ or, even, ‘common interests’… imo it’s more akin to aligned sensibilities
all good for me as I’ve managed to take advantage of exposure (in the sense of reading, lol) to you and the other’s craft to improve my own
cool
Well. Could be me, but that was quite an intense story-ette. Which is also to say, I really enjoyed it.
So many beautiful images and thoughtful pauses to dig in and ponder.
Astonishingly liminal!
thanks, L
What’s this? Where’s the comment I wrote? I did write a comment…didn’t I?
Humble aplologies, Clark, I must have got distracted from the pleasant task in hand and forgotten to press ‘Comment’.
Of course I have no idea how I put what I wanted to say… Sigh.
I like this character you introduce from time to time – ‘The man’ – a grave, slightly self-deprecating figure.
You say, ‘ in the tug of war between imagery and narrative, the former has the upper hand’, but it does not overpower the narrative, the mystery of the man’s decision.
I like how the first and last lines connect.
And now I press ‘comment’ before I’ve finished. Seriously?
The penultimate paragraph is a thing of beauty.
Calling to the man from within himself.
thank you jenne… (the process with this one was interesting/instructional and it was a layer, remove, re-layer… until I could… not see the story, so much as… feel it. In my own limited sense of such things lol