Month: March 2014 | the Wakefield Doctrine

“He was looking for the place called Lee Ho Fook’s,” the Wakefield Doctrine yeah, it’s Monday

March 31, 2014 By clarkscottroger

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

You know how we were focused on clarks last week? And, in the process of focusing on clarks, we saw that: self-consciousness/awareness/doubt/love were all significant factors, right?

…given how the predominant Readership here is clark (and some interested/interesting scotts), we will stay with ‘the Outsider’ for a little bit longer.

(as a good Post writer) I will attempt to provocatize those who have stopped by and say, “hey, we all know that fear is the predominant background emotional tenor for the clarks, right?” and we’ll take it a step further and say that, “while the experience of fear is not exclusively of a clarklike nature, (we) clarks are the only one, (of the three worldviews), who will feel guilt about experiencing fear.

Ok! This is going to be an experiment in a ‘running Post’, you know, like an old fashioned serial (movie, book, killing, romance), we will advance our topic in stages that a marked by a specific point that, hopefully, will inspire you (the Reader) to:

laugh and say ‘you fuckin clarks!’ (scotts)
get quiet and when attention is restored to it’s proper place, intone, ‘well, that’s pretty contrived, don’t you feel?’ (rogers)
press your lips together… smile inside your head and think, ‘yeah! I know what you mean… but….’ (clarks)

Part 1

the Wakefield Doctrine is a fun, useful and unique approach to understanding the behavior of the people in our lives. properly applied, the perspective made available by ‘the Doctrine’ will let you enjoy an insight into the life of the people closest to you, knowledge of the reality of people around you who are seeking to gain an advantage over you and a way to minimize the emotional sucker punches that seem to be a high-frequency occurrence with certain personality types. Learn about what this Wakefield Doctrine has to say about people and reality and behavior and you need never again find yourself saying, “why on earth would they go and do a thing like that? I really thought I knew them better!”

Cliffhanger Number One: so a clark will actually, if they pull the slightly yellowed and moth-eaten sheets off of the emotional furniture in their subject realities, realize that they are very concerned about maintaining the Good Opinion of total strangers.¹

1) not just strangers, people who are only moderately significant, like, say the 23 year clerk-girl at the 7/11! Because if she smiles at the right time, the day takes on a hopeful note, if she laughs at the wrong time (just before or just after the interaction), the day will immediately acquire a feeling that simply confirms that many things in life, do, in fact, suck and only if they, (the clark) did something better/did not forget to be a better person/just paid attention more then they could thrive and flourish and not be such a drag

Filed Under: Featured, Psychology, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: Personal, personality types, psychology of personality, relationships, self-improvement, the Wakefield Doctrine

TToT Post the Wakefield Doctrine ”Royale with Cheese, it’s the little differences that matter!”

March 29, 2014 By clarkscottroger

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NS_ROi0iiZw

Well…

Weather, decent livelihood and family. (check?)

Doctrine, virtual friends and a blog. (check?)

Health, friends and a robust imagination. (check?)

…a Book of Secret Rules (aka the Secret Book of Rules). completo!

Well.

Yeah, even for the Doctrine, this is peu là-bas, but as our european friends are inclined to say, ‘well, just make the best of it, ok?”

While we have met the requirements of the Ten Things of Thankful bloghop, we are still a little short in the standards, which, for New Readers and/or participants, are brief yet quite demanding: provide Ten Things that you are thankful today for and convince us, (the other participants), that you would be willing and comfortable telling us (this) List, were we all to find ourselves at a cocktail party or cookout some day.

(If I may), the value of this gratitude exercise, for me, is in gaining an additional perspective. We live our lives and do things and get things, have things happen to us and do things for other people, but, for the most part it is ‘on the fly’…we simply do it. This bloghop requires us to remember or recall or recollect or even just notice that something good happened (to us, to our family, our friends even our dog). This ‘separate-from-the act’ makes all the difference in the world (imo). (Last week I was talkmenting to Kristi (‘K2’ Kristi, though in this case, I could very well say the same thing and get the same reception from ‘Kristi’ Kristi)… in any event, her, (K2’s Post), had to do with ”re-framing’ bad things that happened in her week, into things that she felt grateful for (I don’t think she would say it quite that way, but hopeful you get the idea). In any event, in my Comment, I used the word, ‘witnessing’. I hesitated in my decision to use this particular word. My perception is that this word, in general usage, has a certain religious connotation. My understanding of K2, from the admittedly limited view of a blog visited once or twice a week, is that religion is a very significant aspect of her life, (as it is with many), so I was concerned that my usage of this term, while not all that far from her’s, is decidedly non-religious. A long way of saying, ‘to be able to witness an act of seeing the good in what appears to be the bad is a rather beneficial thing’. (yeah, I know, thats the short way to say it?)

This …perspective is one the most valuable things I get from participating in this here bloghop here, the opportunity to witness people acting the way that people are capable of, but don’t always manage to maintain.

(…I remember when I first ‘met’ Lizzi. I’ve told the story a number of times, at least the part where I was ‘met at the door and grilled mercilessly’ by my co-host (and Friend of the Doctrine) Christine. But the thing that was happening (at that time) was that Lizzi was just starting on a gratitude list thing. And, knowing that she was a clark, I understood her desire to ‘do something to help herself’, but I was totally knocked out by how she kept doing it, writing list after list, while she was in a place (one that, unfortunately, all clarks know for too well) that writing a Gratitude List was the last thing that made sense. But she did.)

cool

Your hosts

A Fly on our (Chicken Coop) Wall, Amycake and the Dude, Considerings, Finding Ninee, Getting Literal, I Want Backsies, Mother of Imperfection, Rewritten, Thankful Me, The Wakefield Doctrine

An InLinkz Link-up

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FTSF the Wakefield Doctrine (“what?? what did you say??! yeah, I went to a concert last night…. you’ll have to speak up a little shouter”)

March 28, 2014 By clarkscottroger

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

Today being Friday, we’re hanging with the girls/women/friends/hot chicks at the Finish the Sentence Friday bloghop. They are fun and are totally possessed of the aforementioned but un-specified attributes. The ‘they’ being: Stephanie, Kate, Janine and Kristi. Hey, now that I see our host’s names (and for me, the connectors to the descriptors are near- instantaneous), I realize that I have ‘met’ 2 out of 4 of these talented writers! By ‘met’, I mean, of course, at our Friday Night Vidchat* Kristi is a regular and Kate stopped in last week, we had a rather good time. So that leaves Janine and Stephanie. Janine was almost in attendance last Friday. The biggest hurdle to attending a vidchat is always scheduling, for a variety of reasons, vidchats are not simply, “oh honey? be a dear and amuse the kids for a little, I want to go hangout with my virtual friends on the tele screen”

So hopefully Janine and Stepanie (who should be back from her road trip by now) can stop in for a brief visit at say…. 8:30 pm EDST

…no, I’m not avoiding today’s (unfinished) sentence!

I went to a concert…

but as any blog writer out there knows, there is that time, after we know the topic but before we know how we are going to deal with it, that we sit quietly and shake our minds, like a metaphorical snow globe calmly watching the half formed ideas drift around and hope that an something comes to us that will make the Post be ‘one of those Posts’…. that people write Comments that include: ‘I really identified with what you…‘ ‘wow! that takes me back‘ ‘I really laughed when you said…’ and ‘stay the hell out of my head, I don’t care what your Doctrine tells you, you peeping-tom-assed creep‘ You know, like we all hope for…

I went to a concert…

(we all chipped in a quarter for gas, crammed into Lennie’s girlfriend’s parent’s VW, $4.50 Tickets in hand, got to the RI Auditorium a half hour early, (warming up for Hendrix was Cactus and Catmother and the Allnight Newsboys), and the wooden folding chairs were freezing because the night before the ‘Auditorium’ hosted a hockey game and they put plywood over the ice for the concert. and … and!! the best thing? my ears rang for two days and I couldn’t have been happier going to school and saying. “what?! can’t hear you” … tinnitus was the live-concert-souvenir of choice… )

…the histerio-musico cachet that derives from seeing Jimi Hendrix is almost worth the age bracket that is required to make this claim.

the Wakefield Doctrine

presents

the fabulous bloggers Friday Vidchat

(with your hosts, Lizzi and Michelle)

on google+ hangouts… at 8:00 pm EDST

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‘lighten-up Thursday’ the Wakefield Doctrine (“students of the Doctrine need to read Cyndi’s Comment on yesterday’s Post”)

March 27, 2014 By clarkscottroger

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

lets have a half day today!!

…. (but like it says in the subtitle…. you want to learn more about this here Doctrine here? then go to yesterday’s Post and read them comments… the thing around here is that Comments are not just ‘hey love you Post…it made me laugh’, Comments around here, an awful high percentage of the time, are, in fact, a continuation of whatever it is I started to look at in the Post. The insights offered by Jean and roger and zoe and Lizzi and Denise and especially Cyndi are extensions of the Post, including Kimberly (who we will give the courtesy of saying, “yes this is fun and totally insightful, but once you start seeing the clarks and scotts and rogers in your life, we’re not going to guarantee that you can stop seeing them!”)

Medical Profession:

Physician: roger (the more technical, the higher the probability …internist sure, oncologist? totally)
Surgeon: scott it’s all, (pardon the expression), in the execution, scotts are way and…
the clarks? GP and Medical Examiner (yeah we get that a lot).

Semi-public Service:

Police: scotts (seriously, the job description is: prowl the streets (and I believe that they actually call them prowl cars), alone for the most part, find people who are doing wrong and chase them!! with as much noise as possible and enough lights to win the ‘Christmas in Branson Yard Decoration Contest’) and, …and! capture and do all sorts of things to the prey (that’s right scott! handcuffs!!! lol;
Fire Fighters: rogers (protect the structures that house the herd, maintain the status quo…what was needs to remain what is… work in teams of similarly dressed professionals…. with really silly hats!)
Librarians… do I really need to continue?

Retail Sales:

Grocery Store Manager: rogers because the system is the only way… lots of under-educated people, who kinda need the work and aren’t planning a career in Produce and Meat;
Assistant Manager: scotts hey this is a paycheck, that last job didn’t pan out and hey, it could happen to anyone…and the AM gets to gather up the shopping carts in the lot and make sure that unruly, un-slightly and or, ‘what-do-you-mean-you-won’t-go-out-with-me!?-you-think-you’re-too-good’ parking lot enforcement;
cashier clarks (well, I have this idea for a book and this is going to let me have a lot of time…and besides, my boy friends in a band and he said that they record company was just about read to sign them, but the rent money is needed to pay for a little more studio time.

Anyone? Got a favorite Occupation?? (now, remember: ‘everyone does everything at one time or another’. )

Filed Under: Featured, Psychology, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: personality types, psychology of personality, relationships, self-improvement, the Wakefield Doctrine

‘it was a dark and windy….morning’ the Wakefield Doctrine a call to clarks: ‘hey, you have all already thought of this, but lets try it one time’

March 26, 2014 By clarkscottroger

Welcome the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

(Astute Doctrine Readers will note the presence of the secondary scottian aspect manifesting in then use of ‘hey!’ in the subtitle of today’s Post. Very good!)

So about us fuckin clarks. Could we be more: self-restraining(not in the fun way), self-defeating(which wouldn’t be the worst thing, but we don’t quite truly ever completely give up), self-sabotaging (sure we have the perfect plan and, if all fails, I’ll give it a half-hearted effort), self-conscious (is there any other way, living in our heads as we all do?). No. No we cannot!
Now, before we all get into that (really) disturbing (only in reflection) self-assessment where we admit to all our faults, mistaking our statement of recognized faults as being an honest, well-meaning and productive owning up to things that we do badly, albeit un-intentionally.
Let me say this: it’s all about fear and being the Outsider. (as clarks), we fear being recognized as Outsiders and pointed at and made fun of by the crowd of people who make up our day to day lives. But, like an alcoholic who, as they approach the point of realizing that they cannot do it themselves, still insist that whatever help is available be done discreetly, lest everyone finds out that they are getting help… unable to see that everyone knew all along.
clarks go through their (our) (my) day, with the baseline goal of avoiding detection by the ‘real’ people, in the hope that by observing and watching, we can learn to be like everyone else. clarks go through their (our) (my) day, believing that we can ‘pass’, blend in and not stand out and, by doing so, have time to practice what we are sure is totally normal behavior for a person of my age/stature/profession/worldview. Until, that is, I am called out… out of my head, where I live. All the time, nearly. And what calls me out is confrontation. Not, ‘hey! fuck you buddy! you cut me off…what the hell‘ confrontation, (at least not, necessarily). Sometimes it’s simply…wait, you want to hear an actual example of what I am talking about?

so yesterday, I was wasting some time on ‘the Facebook’. I went to this posting (or wall or whatever you call when a person posts things in a certain vein or theme), and there was some kind of rant, about the world (I know! imagine that!), however I was in the mood, so I wrote something semi-clever as a Comment in which I mentioned one of the previous Commentors, complimenting his insight and building on that. Fine, then I went back to work. Came back a couple of hours later and I see that someone (not the person who posts things, another Reader) has followed my Comment and he’s all up in my face with how ‘I’m totally wrong and he never said anything like that all and how I’m ‘just because you have a blog you think you are better than us and a know it all and you are not, you are just a want to be’ (etc etc). I am a clark. My first reaction was ‘my head swelled up and my face fell’* I am a clark. I felt awful. I felt that everyone (the other Commentors), somehow were staring… dis- approving, liking… dis- something me. Did I say I felt bad? I laughed (as clarks have the gift of/the curse of) at how …scared and bothered and embarrassed I felt. Me! in my home, totally anonymous and, because of this undeniable beginning-confrontation, I felt very bad. I laughed as I thought, ‘jeez, what a clark!’ So I replied to my ….’critic’ and said, ” Yes, I am, indeed, ‘a want to be’ lol” got up and tried to walk it off. (Seriously! I think only you clarks out there will recognize this part of the story). I was shaken by the encounter. I have stood on the deck of a fishing boat in 20 foot seas at night and smiled. I have stood by my dog, Ola, as the professionals told us that she would not live and I projected peace and calmness to her. I have been in emergency rooms with live threatening bad things happening and have managed to make jokes about ‘informed consent’ and yet, and yet! yesterday afternoon, because someone made it clear that I was causing a problem in the virtual (as in not real) world, my stomach was in knots.

…who wants to be a clark? (Anyone raising your hand at this time, listen up. Tomorrow, sometime in the day, I would like to do a ‘clark only’ vidchat… strictly for peers let me know in the comments)

Oh, the ‘ending’ of the story? I went back that wall I was commenting and the person whose wall it was, had deleted this other person, wiped out all of his comments and wrote that ‘his wall was for adults and would not tolerate stupid’ (or words to that effect). lol

…but I am still a clark. The lesson that was brought home to me yesterday, as it has countless times before and the ‘lesson of the lesson’, is that I need to see myself in such a way that will allow me to know that I am not really hiding anything from the world and they don’t all laugh (at least most of the time) and it is alright for me to get into confrontations without having to wonder if I will be marked as ‘the Outsider’ and lose my chance to be real, forever.

ya know?

* an expression we owe to the Progenitor roger, who is clever like that with language and, with those kinds of ‘turns of phrases’ almost redeems the behavior of his people.