Month: November 2012 | the Wakefield Doctrine - Part 2 Month: November 2012 | the Wakefield Doctrine - Part 2

a scott, a party (no surprise there) the Wakefield Doctrine (…it is the same party and yes, we will get back to the clark)

November 23, 2012 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks who think, scotts who are all and simply about acting and rogers…so emotional)

The Wakefield Doctrine maintains that we all live our lives within and from one of three characteristic worldviews:

  1. the personal reality of ‘the Outsider’ (the clark)
  2. the environment of ‘Predator and prey’, (the scott) and
  3. the world of ‘belonging to the Herd’ (which is the perspective of the roger).

Since this is the second in a series illustrating how the Wakefield Doctrine can offer advice on meeting new people and how best to make decisions regarding relationships, lets jump to another worldview!

…by looking at the (rather common) situation in the life of a scott:

  • a scott
  • a party, of course you’re invited
Friday
You’re a scott.  You have your weekly staff meeting scheduled for 3:00 pm. In your Company, these meetings are seen as examples of how to research, plan, organise and execute a Staff meeting so that it is productive and everyone leaves feeling confident they are valued members of your team. Your Meeting Agendas are regarded as proof of what careful planning and meticulous research will produce in team morale building meetings.  You accept the approval of your superiors with grace and an inner smile,  knowing that ‘the Agenda’ is simply the cover, a diversion from the fact that what you do at these meetings comes naturally, and not from meticulous research and planning.

In the main work area, on your way to your office, you pass one of your newer employees saying to the group surrounding him,  “today’s my birthday… I reserved the private function room at the Calypso Club tonight… throwing myself a party!”  You decide you need some amusement, so you stop, which causes everyone to quickly return to their desk, leaving only you and the  ‘New Hire’, and you say. “Did I hear you say there was a party?” They look startled at the attention they are receiving, but recover quickly, “Yeah…. uh yes! the Company Policy doesn’t say anything about not having parties!”
You say nothing. Enjoying the growing discomfort and uncertainty on their face. You can see the struggle going on inside their head…’do I run or fight it out?’ You say, “What time?”  Startled but with a look of relief they say, “8:30!”  As you walk away, without looking back,  you say, “I’ll be there!”

The first 1/8th of your work day  is spent answering emails and returning calls. You hate this part of your job.

The rest of your work day is spent solving problems and coaching your staff as they struggle with the workload. You love this part of your job.

The last 1/8th of  your work day is spent in meetings with upper Management. The CEO  is someone you respect and listen to, he single-handedly built the Company and though he has been said to be tyrannical, monomaniacal and abusive, you have a good relationship with him. The CFO, not so much. You find the precise, overly careful, fussiness of this Executive to be annoying, but you have resigned yourself to having to tolerate him. He totally loves you.

…your time at home before having to leave for the party is spent… looking at the mess your place is, resolve to keep it cleaner, well neater at any rate, find what you are looking for, have a bite to eat, debate going to the gym, decide to use the expensive exercise equipment you own, start 3 games of online scrabble as you ride the stationary bike, alternating between texting your siblings at college, emailing your folks back home, quick microwave dinner, drink a coke, decide to go on a diet take work clothes off throw things over your shoulder looking for the shoes you really wanted to wear to the party thinking of that makes you look at the clock realizing you are late take a shower get dressed and run out the door

The final 1/12th of the last 1/3 of your time at home  ….with a sense of excited anticipation, head out to the Calypso Club

(to be continued…)

(switched out the music vid from Ladysmith Black Mambazo to our little friends at Halestorm, have used this vid recently but it so gets the feel of today’s Post. Plus the drummer is so much fun to watch.)

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a clark, a party (you might be surprised!) the Wakefield Doctrine…you asked for real life examples, lets get started.

November 21, 2012 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

The Wakefield Doctrine maintains that we all live our lives in one of three characteristic worldviews, the personal reality of ‘the Outsider’ (the clark) the environment of ‘Predator and prey’, (the scott) and the world of ‘belonging to the Herd’ (which is the perspective of the roger). We all begin life with the possibility of all three, but at an early age settle into one (which we call the predominant worldview). While we never lose the potential of experiencing the world as ‘the other two’ worldviews,  what people call personality type is, in reality, the manner of our coping with the demands and the particular challenges of these three worldviews.

Today we start a series of Posts that will, by way of little vignettes, provide us with an insight into how clarks, scotts and rogers perceive and respond to social interactions.
In other words, the Wakefield Doctrine’s advice on meeting new people and how best to make decisions regarding relationships!

Lets start by looking at a (not un-common) situation in the life of a clark:

  • a clark
  • gets invited to a party

 You are a clark and have been invited to a party being thrown by a friend at work (this friend is a scott). ( “Hey! I decided what the hell, you only live once….today’s my birthday… I reserved the private function room at the Calypso Club tonight… throwing myself a party! I need you to come to my party!! I won’t take no for an answer, what do you say?” ) You like this friend at work, it’s Friday morning so you find yourself saying, ( “Sure, that sounds good. I would like to do that thing. Put me down on the Guest List”)

The first 7/8ths of your work day  is spent enjoying the prospect of going to the party. You feel good about saying yes to your friend. You think to yourself that you really do deserve some un-structured time away from work instead of the same old visit to the family on weekends, and maybe this weekend you might not even do that, but instead just call them and talk on the phone. You actually feel excited about the prospect of meeting new people (something you haven’t done since getting your current job).

The last 1/8th of your work day is spent wondering if you really want to go out tonight, after all you do have  a pretty busy schedule after work ( no matter what they say, you know that you are not a hermit, recluse, nun or monk, but there seems to never be enough hours in the day to do all the interesting things there are to do and besides there is that resume that is nearly ready for final edit and if that is not a life priority, it is hard to imagine what is, so first things first…get that resume finished and get the job you know you should have and then there will be plenty of time for going out at night and all that stuff!)

The final 1/12th of the last 1/8th of  your work day is spent laying the ground work for a ‘no show’ at the party. ( “The party? Yeah, totally looking forward to it! I may be a bit late, there is a call I promised a relative I would make, they are overseas so the timing is critical. Sure I’ll bet you see me there, maybe a little late, more towards 9 than 8:30. No! I surely will be there!” )

The first 1/3 of your time at home before having to leave for the party is spent alternating between being comfortable with the decision to ‘give this one a miss’ and, at the same time feeling like there is something wrong with your decision. You decide to take a logical approach and, after getting some reading done, make a list of the pros and cons of going out tonight.

The last 1/3 of your time at home is spent wondering why you are finding yourself having to make a decision that you thought you have already made… you retrace the events of the day, with special attention to the exact circumstances of being invited to the party. You know that you like the friend that invited you, but you are not sure that they weren’t inviting you just because you walked up to them while they were talking to some of your other co–workers and maybe they felt that it would be rude to not invite you and besides there are some people at work that this friend seems to hang out with who are not very nice… so maybe, at least this time, it would be best to stay home. You know that if they invited you once, there will be other times… yeah that sounds like the most reasonable course of action.

The final 1/12th of the last 1/3 of your time at home begins with the thought… “god! it’s happening again!”  Your confidence in your decision to not go to the party begins to lose all credibility.. you stare at the clock… you look around at your place and think, “no! not this time. Maybe I am sort of doing it all again, but I will walk out that door and go to that party tonight”  …for the moment, there is quiet resolve and you walk out your door and head to the Calypso Club

(to be continued…)

We need to stop because it is Wednesday Morning and we have not completed the Outline for today’s BlogTalkRadio Show.

Check here or at ‘the Facebook’ for the link to the show which will begin at 4:00 pm EST today. We will be discussing the Wakefield Doctrine and what it has to offer, not only in terms of understanding the people in our lives, but how the Doctrine can help us change the things about ourselves that we have always wanted to change.

(Hey, I’m not sure, but I think the little ‘player’ you see below this sentence will get you to the show if you hit play at 4:00 pm EST today. )

Listen to internet radio with the Wakefield Doctrine on Blog Talk Radio

 

( If that didn’t work, try pasting the following into your damn browser:    http://www.blogtalkradio.com/the-wakefield-doctrine/2012/11/21/the-wakefield-doctrine-how-it-works  )

 

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the Week started yesterday!! hurry up! the Wakefield Doctrine work to do, no time to waste!

November 19, 2012 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks ‘who think’ and scotts ‘who act’ and rogers ‘who feel’ )

 

…thanks to Molly and Denise for the lively and challenging discussion during this weekend’s Saturday Night Drive! For those of you who have not called in yet, we usually share questions about the Doctrine, examples of the characteristics of the three types and  any new insights into how the Wakefield Doctrine can be used to help in our lives, what with jobs and kids and friends and such.

So this past Saturday Night, I brought the following ‘problem’ to the group:
I am at the point in writing the Wakefield Doctrine book where I need to demonstrate how the Doctrine can be useful in problems and challenges arising in relationships. The Wakefield Doctrine offers a unique insight into why we are attracted to certain people and why we are not… the Doctrine can help you understand why your best friend always goes for the wrong guy…the Doctrine will help you know what to tell your son when you see that he is so ‘in over his head’ with the girl of his dreams…the Doctrine can help you see what it is about you that seems to never learn, continually finding yourself in the very situation you were determined to avoid, this time!

The exchange of ideas during this last ‘Drive’, made it clear that I needed to use these blog Posts as a venue to write scenaria (relating relationship advice). This approach allows me to keep ‘the conversation’ going here at the blog and subsequently, (with a little cut…paste…edit) I will have the needed content for the book.

I also realized I needed the core principles of the Wakefield Doctrine in order for there to be any chance of creating credible dating/relationship situations as illustrations. When I began to write these ‘real life’ situations, I immediately found myself getting bogged down with the thoughts, ‘ok a female clark will see a rogerian guy in this light’ or  ‘a scottian female so hates to be in the company of a male…’ which soon led to my thinking ‘what the heck do I know about what a woman finds attractive in a guy?’

Fortunately I remembered: the Wakefield Doctrine is gender neutral!
Our ‘personality theory’ is predicated on the experiences of humans in one of three characteristic worldviews. The Wakefield Doctrine says, very simply: if you grow up and develop in the worldview characterized as the world of the predator, then you will exhibit the personality type, traits and behaviors of a scott! As a member of the herd, in a personal reality marked by a belief that the world is a quantifiable place and there are Rules to live by, your personality and behavior will be consistent with the rogerian personality type  and clarks… well, you know what you are like!
Of course it is still true that in every way important aspect, men and women are different because of gender.

But the thing that distinguishes the Wakefield Doctrine as a useful and insightful perspective on human behavior is that we start with the reality that the individual is relating (themselves) to and then look at the personality type.

Anyone, male or female, dropped into the worldview of a roger will develop a natural affinity for social relationships and interactions of the group and a talent for the quantifiable sciences; if as a girl or a boy, you grew up experiencing the personal reality we call scottian, then guess what? you will have an irresistible urge to establish the dominance/submissive ranking in any social setting you find yourself in and your temperament will be best described as mercurial.
The effect of gender? It defines an individual’s range of choices in how they express themselves, depending on the culture or civilization our subject is a part of, there may be more or less choices in terms of coping strategies that the individual has available when interacting with their world.

So this week we will present:

  1. a clark is talked into going to a party
  2. a scott at a company bonding retreat
  3. a roger at the annual church picnic
These situations will provide the context for the very helpful relationship advice that our little Doctrine has to offer.

 

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the Week in (pre)View: the Wakefield Doctrine …lots to do, only 5 non-shopping days left!

November 18, 2012 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory that makes sense to a clark, looks like fun to a scott and feels like something everyone will be doing soon …to a roger)

The week up-coming:

  • the Book: I need to write some scenaria that will end up being in the Wakefield Doctrine book. The sad fact of the matter is that I have a limited time each day to write, love to write these Posts, but need to get the Book finished, so lets combine the two!
  • the BlogTalkRadio Show: Episode 2!! Wednesday November 21 4:00 pm EST Please! Do not call in (lol no, not getting all Brer Rabbit on yer asses, I need to try to create the working structure and pacing…then learn to handle calls!)
  • the DocTees: we’re hearing back that they are arriving for domestic locales ( Steve, Michelle, Melanie? maybe by Christmas…lol) Hey, if any of the Prize Winners feel like taking a photo of their DocTee in front of a local Landmark, (body doubles are permitted), you will so end up on the Fashion Center page (with a link)!

In the process of searching the Doctrine archives to see if I used the ‘Pre-View’ Title recently, I came across the following Post (written on October 6 2009).  Some of our blog-writing Readers should be able to identify with the first time, when upon completing a Post, sitting back and having the feeling, “Hey that was fun!“. This is one of those…

time for another Post already?!  oh man, no f*ckin way can I keep this up

OK. I have it together now. No need to get excited. Just sit here, clear the mind, the content is in there. Just relax.

My compliments to any of you out there who have maintained an active blog for more than 3 months. Jesus, this coming up with Posts all the time is not as easy as it looks. And this from the perspective of  ‘as long as there is a new Post once a week’  blogholder. But no one is holding a gun to my head… (‘hey there’s an idea for a Post!’)

SOMEONE IS HOLDING A GUN TO MY….

Sorry, forget it. Surely one of the 103,000,000 blog authors in the world today has already done the definitive, ‘Someone is holding a gun to my head’ treatment. Maybe there are some studies that I can cut and paste and fill up some of this white space and then I can call it a day and get back to my real life!

Alright, seriously now. I do mean my compliment to those of you who have the ability and talent (acquired or learned) to write something new and different and sometimes even interesting, Post after Post after Post…blog after blog after blog. Not bad. But since I am not ready to give up on this little blog of mine, I had better to try to get it together and come up with a Post that will keep the crowdlette coming back for more.

Being that this is the Wakefield Doctrine (aka the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers), I would do well to keep to the subject that I know best. (See? Right there! I don’t know much about grammar and good writing and all, but that last sentence had at least two tenses, and easily three pluperfects in it. Man, this is worse than the first time I recorded myself playing guitar along with Jimi Hendrix. Suffice it to say, if you were there you would not have had too much trouble telling us apart.)

This writing and grammar thing is really starting to annoy me. It’s bad enough that I regret now that I did not take a typing class when I was in high school. (At my current age, in my high school years, ‘Typing Class’ was strictly for people taking a Business curriculum, which meant you were going to be a secretary …which meant you were a girl. That simple, end of cultural subtext).
But with this damn blogging thing, I am being forced to confront the fact that I do not have mad writing skills.  I should have paid attention in my English classes. (Look, it was the 60s when I was in high school, how cool is that?) But the inescapable fact remains that the skill set I would value the most this October morning is not how to play the opening riff of ‘Sunshine of Your Love’. Its funny about how people, at least in the current (american) culture, seem to have an expectation to be able to do certain things well, just because we think we can do them at all. I mean, take singing and writing. Most of us know that we can sing our favorite song in the car, on the way to work, therefore we all equate that with being a singer. Writing, the same. I can, with the help of spellcheck and a lot of proof reading, write a report at work, so how hard can it be to be a writer?

(I have resisted the impulse to hit Preview to see if I’m down far enough on this page to call it a day.) But anyway, you are here because you want to know all about the Wakefield Doctrine. Right?

The Wakefield Doctrine will cause you to see the world in a slightly different manner. Nothing earth-shaking, no flashes of light; ‘oh my god I understand now’ will not be on your lips. What will happen, if you read most of this blog and the associated pages, will be that you might find yourself saying, ‘that person is such a roger‘, or you might find yourself thinking, ‘here comes so-an-so, what a scott he is’ or you could think, ‘shit, I’ll bet I’m one of those clarks the Doctrine is talking about.’

If this happens to you, I have succeeded. If it does not, then I have failed. If you have a question about the Doctrine, leave a Comment or email or whatever the hell people do around here. I will get back to you as soon as I finish my Adult Education class, “You too Can Write Like The Prose’, that I am taking at my little local high school.

(appeared in Wakefield Doctrine blog on October 6 2009)

 

 

 

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“To talk of many things: Of shoes–and ships–and sealing-wax– ” the Wakefield Doctrine …challenging questions from ‘Gen 2’ and them

November 17, 2012 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of knowing about the world, having a drive to act and not react and feeling the emotions that tie us all together)

Those ‘2nd Gen’ Readers are at it again! Writing Comments and such that makes us stop and think, “jeez, I hadn’t thought of it quite that way! What the hell?!?”
I’ll  let you in on a little secret about the writing of this here Blog here, on the condition that you hold your final assessment until the Wakefield Doctrine book shows up in the bookstores.1 2 3 4

…lets go to the Comments:

“...Yup, still a roger (at least when I worked and it was indeed Causal Friday), lol!!”  ( Janine )

“...of those on the list. When it comes to my worldview, as it relates to casual Friday, I’m a roger, too. Great post” ( Cari )

“…And just what, exactly, is not causal about a 1940′s style suit? Complete with the little hat?

Jeans are for getting dirty in and logos only belong on free things, like the Wrangler t-shirt I am wearing right now — you know, the one that is covered with paint from numerous projects, including today’s.
You know, even though I do get the ‘roger’ thing of dressing the part to play the part, it cracks me up to see it in motion. This last week, our Tae Kwon Do uniforms came in, and my youngest — a full fledged roger — was finally happy to participate in the classes.
How he looked had a huge impact on how he felt about his ability (and he is only five).”        ( Molly )

“…So wait…clarks are the over-dressed with suits? …but what about the crunchy clarks? You know, the ones who love fleece and jeans and hiking boots? I can tell you, I love all three and would regularly wear them to my teaching job. :) Now, that I work at home, I actually like the jeans and fleece, still, but also like leggings and layers and knit hats.
Oh crap…I just realized I’m over dressed to be working at home. Crap.”       ( Cyndi )

“…As far as casual Fridays go, I think I’m a mix between Rogers and a little bit of Clark. I often found myself dressing up on Fridays, while the rest of the office dressed down. Then other days I’d be comfy and casual.”        (Melanie )

Very good questionifying!

For a response, let me coagulate my individual responses and see if I can’t get out of here this morning without being late to my book meeting!

 

“… the trick is not what you wear but what the reason you give yourself for a particular choice! Having said that, even that is not what we are meaning to say;  sure you can know what you think your reasons are for choosing one set of clothes over the other, where the Wakefield Doctrine really gets useful is when you can infer, from what you think your reasons are (for the choices) just what the nature of the reality that you are living in, the character of your worldview!

The example of the clarklike female in the 1940′s business attire is not that she is putting on airs, but by the weird underwear (or tattoos or jewelry), she is demonstrating that no matter how ‘appropriate the fashion’ how ‘in style she might appear’  she is still playing ‘dress up’.
In a sense, all clarks play dress up!  It shows in the small ways that hint that we are laughing at ourselves, even as we make a serious effort to be ‘like the real people’

oh yeah, does anyone want to tell Cyndi about shoes and female clarks?”

OK..time for work in the ‘real’ ‘world’.

Saturday Night Drive tonight!  take a walk on the child side, call us up on the telephone!  1-218-339-0422  access code: 512103 #

 

 

1) sometimes I’ll write with only the barest, slimmest piece of an idea, a scenario meant to illustrate the principles of the Doctrine…without knowing what exactly I am going to say. Worse, I will start with a random life-situation and stick it in the Post, only to realize that I need to write the whole explanation! Lets just say, I write my way out of it and let it go at that!

2) what do you mean there are no more Bookstores?!

3) no Title yet, a collaborative effort with a person who is in the therapy/human services field, the book will be geared to the ‘professional practionair market’

4) that is all I can say…for now!

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