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TToT -the Wakefield Doctrine- ‘located on the Corner of Desire and Need’

February 14, 2015 By

Welcome to Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

no, it's ok! I'm a Saint

no, it’s ok! I’m a Saint

Man, glad that week’s over*. No, wait! let me re-….re-relate myself to it, to this past week.

1) I’ve got Dyanne in my head…saying something to the effect of “One thing that happened to you this week. Describe it and then stop.  Wait! Put a number in front of it. Yes, it does have to be the number ‘1’. Now go to the next thing… that’s how a List is written.”

2) Kristi is smiling and suggesting, “Well, that’s certainly a good start! Why, no, I don’t think photos in a TToT are distracting…per se”,  (she laughs and continues), “…just take your time and everything else will take care of itself”.

3) zoe (Ivy) has somehow come up with a ‘visual’  based on a classroom, like 4th or 5th grade… “psst   clark!  hey  clark…. I got my theme.  Ya want some help with your… list?”  (this in a 65 db  whisper… which she manages without moving her lips and, all the while, smiling at the teacher)

4) Michelle (has now)  (somehow) stepped into  zoe’s visual as, naturally the Teacher.. but she’s smiling  “very good, clark! remember, not only are  you are telling a story, you’re also showing your Reader something of yourself. very good!!  Miss Ivy… be so kind and stay here after the test, won’t you?”

5) Sarah  would, by this point (Item 5) be sensing the theme I’m trying to pull off… her face, (were she to be seen), would portray the full range of encouragement and, a little incredulity… “huh! you really going try for that?…it’s a long list”,  …shifting to encouragement… “ok, ok I see now, you can do it!”  ending in an approving smile.

6) Lisa  is quiet. There is a sense of ‘looking around’, not certain if what she’s reading is going to be met with a hoots of derision or a smiles of approval…and there is definitely a sense of hope that my efforts don’t bog down before I finish the list… ( she also begins to wonder just what the hell kind of bloghop she’s gotten herself involved with…)

7) Kristi …”no freaking way!” Kristi would succeed, (against her better judgement), at not bursting out laughing…knowing two things: a) she’s glad to be a co-hostinae and 2) clarks sure are a strange bunch and she’s glad to be one

8) Christine  the ‘visual’ here is way too complex: it contains a combination of qualities and (an) appreciation of her friendship that I clearly do not have the nerve to attempt and yet, at the same time I  am… obliquely   (…yeah, who’s a clark?) … Christine would, at this point, laugh/look around/shrug to herself/laugh

9) Lizzi   a smile, a sense of recognition and a moment of peace….

10) 1.3  (and yes… one of the SVG? that one that’s most like… she totally flashes me as I walk off)

 

Ten Things of Thankful

 

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Thursday -the Wakefield Doctrine- ‘without question, the best of days to have hot lunch at school’

February 12, 2015 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

school-cafeteria-1950s

(Given our demographic at the present time, this Post may have more value as an insight into the lives of the child sent off to school today than it does to Readers who might recognize their own worldviews…whatever)

… gotta tell you guys!  You know how, when I’m drawing a blank for ideas to build a Post on, I go surfing for images and such? (no, I’m sure I’ve old you about my approach to writing blog Posts before …. find an image, hear a song being played behind a commercial on TV, read the labels on the food products in the cabinets… the normal things people do to come up with ideas for Posts! Well, I do! Anyway, today I was feeling the need to write a Post, but had nothing. Well, actually I have a nearly complete Post that I wrote last night, the only problem is that last night was Wednesday night and not Thursday night as I thought… so that Post will have to wait for the week to catch up with it.)

So this morning, once I was able to accept that it was Thursday and not Friday, which is a lot like the moment that we realize that the blind date our friend set up was with a roger and not the scott we were hoping for…. I got to thinking back to high school days. Naturally I started looking for a memorytrail* to Thursdays, which lead to hamburger fricassee (the best of school hot lunches)… the next step was to search for images and who do I find in the image results page but our friends  Kristi (Finding Ninee) and Stephanie (Mommy, for real). No!  really!  don’t believe me?  here:

school lunch + hamburger fricassee

… no! I’m sure neither of them will mind… (then there’s that really cool one of a semi-high school Kristi… and Stephanie is looking quite proper… you have to scroll down about ‘three rolls’ to where you see a hamburger and a photo of 4 past Presidents… you’ll spot Stephanie first)

…and how cool it that?  (follow the links on their images… very worthwhile reading)

…so, time’s up. Seeing how I always (try to) convey something of an insight into the Wakefield Doctrine with every post, allow me to suggest that,  if you have small children (or a clarklike spouse) and they are exhibiting what appears to be ‘fear’, of doing something or going somewhere,  at basis of most clark’s fear is the dread of ‘exposure’,  …of becoming (by virtue of not doing something correctly, or at very least, as well as everyone else), found out. That is what makes a clark, (young or old, male or female, accomplished or hiding), say that they don’t want to do something ( something that you very well know that they would want to do).  Help them by identifying with that sense of ‘no pants in front of the audience’… but, for godsakes, don’t invoke the, ‘well everyone feels like that‘! Unless you’re a clark yourself, you will not appreciate the degree of fundamental aversion to being held up before everyone as being… different and flawed.  There are things that you can do (and, I suspect most of you who are identifying with this already do)… is to let them, (the clark in question), sneak up on expressing their concerns and providing the support (which is to say, reduce the pressure to perform and the time for them to come up with a strategy that they can get themselves through the first time…after they do, they will be fine.)  your clark will thank you at some point.

 

* hats off to Lizzi, the Master of…. er,  the Mistress of cool neologism

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Tun -the Wakefield Doctrine- ‘stress is actually fear, …dressed up like a really hot woman (or) man*’

February 10, 2015 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

kalif2

ok  quick and short little Post.  the asterix in the subtitle? (ahem)

‘the Wakefield Doctrine is both gender and culture neutral. the personality types are simply the best effort on the part of (an) individual to contend with a personal reality’ that is (best) characterized as:

  1. the worldview of ‘the Outsider’ (clarks): the predominate feature of this individual’s reality is the, ‘apart from’ that imbues the life of the clark. often confused (willfully or not) with being different, odd, introverted, shy, anti-social or  funny-like-that, apartness is them, not us. (of the three personality types), only clarks know that ‘they are here and the world is out there’.  it is a common misperception (when encountering a clark) to mistake being (their) ‘apart from’ as  ‘being different, shy, antisocial, artistic, eccentric, just-don’t-want-to-be-like-everyone-else’
  2. the world of the ‘the Predator’ (scotts) immediately identifiable by their presence, scotts have the quality of certainty and decisiveness that make them most likely picked as the leader. they have simply learned the advantage of impatience…. the most common mistake people make about scotts is that ‘they should slow down just a little and maybe people will understand them and they won’t keep getting into trouble with (the principle, the shift manager, the cops, the parish priest or their best friend’s mother)’
  3. the life of ‘the Herd Member’ (rogers) they’re everywhere, the majority of (any given) population.  the most common error people make about rogers is that they are ‘taking things personally, when they are taking things personally’… they are, (one of the most tried and true tests to determine a rogerian personality type is to count the personal pronouns in their speech,) but that’s not the point! rogers,live in an chronological world, where B always follows A … unless there was a time when A followed B and then, depending on the current situation, that may be the way it’s always been.

… so, the point of our bullet-pointed insight: as you go through your day today, observe the other person, infer ‘how they are relating themselves to the world around them’, you will then know their predominant worldview and will be in a position to (be able) to see the world as the other person is experiencing it.

Why? Why go through all this? Because it is (for many of us) better to know than to not know, because everyone’s life has people in it…important people/loved one/barely-tolerated-co-workers/necessary people/obligatory people… they (or rather our interaction with them) is what makes up our day. Now if you are a person who always: gets along with everyone/never has a problem dealing with people/likes and respects everyone… then you can skip this section and go down and listen to our bonus music video …there you go, just click on the red arrow (from an album that disappeared from the shelves before you were born)

… everyone/anyone else?  back to the title. stress:  it happens, it is the fear that we will not meet the demands of the world around us, (as best we understand it… the world and the demands!) and, yet, when you look closer at this fear, it reflects a desire, a hope, a need within to be in harmony with our surroundings… not to submit to a greater force,  as much as to find the common measure in those we interact with…

damn! look at the time!! got to go find the common measure out there

 

(yeah, a bit of a throwback to early blog days, I really enjoyed this song, so here ya go)

 

 

 

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Mu -the Wakefield Doctrine- ‘the Weekend in (re)-View: there were encouraged smiles in Outerville’

February 9, 2015 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

BeFunky_photo-3.jpg

…I thought I had the ‘hook’ for today’s Post earlier this morning, around 6:10am. My computer froze up and the Error Message appeared:

Hit continue to ‘Force Quit’ the Application

damn!  doesn’t that describe what happens to clarks so often? (Especially on Mondays because we’ve just had two days during which time we could pick the people we were with), we learn and remember that part of what the Wakefield Doctrine offers is, as they so cleverly put it, ‘to self-improve oneself’. But this weekend was encouraging. A good TToT and a good Call-in discussion. So today, I will go out into the world (see, I told you I was a clark!) and know that there are other clarks struggling with the semi-self-imposed status of Outsider and, simply by virtue of this (identification with other clarks), I will more frequently remember to not forget that I have a choice in how I think and act and feel.

Had a great Saturday Night Call-in this weekend. Cynthia, Denise and the Progenitor roger! Topic: how do clarks best deal with the roger in the workplace (or to be a bit more accurate: how to manage a rogerian-dominated workplace). Very fun and informative and entertaining and everything you could want from a phone conversation.

So what do we clarks know now that we did not know, say, 3 or 4 years ago? For starters, that there is a direct (but not directly appreciable) benefit from associating with clarks in a context that encourages identification (with/for the other clarks). We also better understand our selfs and while this is not, in and of itself, a benefit, it is the sharing of this (increased) self-understanding that makes the identificationing with other clarks so effective.

But enough about clarks. how about scotts and rogers? What are they getting out of this thing that they could not get elsewhere? Again, for starters:

  • an increased sense of awareness of that which bothers scotts (on a pre-conscious level), with a better acceptance that it is not a flaw (this, by virtue of the scott’s heightened clarklike aspect)
  • (for the rogers) a sense of an increased-enthusiasm-for-nothing-that-is-identifiable, yet not perceived as threatening

 

 

 

Feet notes:

so: Denise and Cyn-thee-uh  and the Progenitor roger were all on the Wakefield Doctrine Saturday Night Call-in this Saturday past. It was a splendid time, the high points, syllabus-istically speaking the insight nodes were as follows:

topic: how do clarks manage (themselves or others) in the workplace  with an emphasis on the difficulties of dealing with rogerian co-workers

agreed: the negative, ‘lashing out’ of a roger is worse than being nipped by a scott or ignored by a clark

agreed: that the reason for this ‘over-reaction’ by the clark is their emotional investment (conscious or otherwise)

agree: the tendency is for clarks to take (false) responsibility for the actions, reactions and consequences involving others

agree: rogers (and scotts) think they know what it is it fear (the negative) reactions of others, but they are wrong

agree: rogers do not accept admission of ineptitude, no member of the Herd would ever consider this

 

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Mondant -the Wakefield Doctrine- true life situations, real Doctrine principles…and musical humor!

February 2, 2015 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

images-2

So I was saying, just the other day, I said, ‘you know, the hardest thing about trying to write the Wakefield Doctrine book is that, despite the fact that it, (the Doctrine), can be applied to unlimited life situations (for insight or laughter-based purposes), when I get to a section where I need to say, ‘for example, in this common life situation, one might apply the Doctrine as follows’  I draw a total blank!’.  The other person laughed and said, ‘hey! sucks to be you!’  In any event, I had two experiences this weekend that I would like to offer as examples of the Wakefield Doctrine proving itself useful.

Situation 1: Maps, Directions and clarks

Part of my work involves working with another clark. (Another) part of my work involves inspecting properties. This weekend I needed to ‘cover’ the inspections that normally, my associate clark would do. There were 5 houses in a nearby city. I had the list and was beginning to check the google map (for best route) and my associate said, ‘here start with this property and then….’ and proceeded to give me directions…

Wakefield Doctrine Principle: clarks are good at couple of things: a) having a sense of direction 2) visualizing

… so, not only was I not needing directions, I was enjoying the prospect of mapping out the perfect route*. However,  I was pressed for time and left with the suggested sequence of houses on a piece of paper. (I should stop at this point and remind the Reader that clarks sometimes think that they are in sole possession of ‘the correct answer’ and, if someone else were to offer an alternative, well, by definition, it couldn’t be ‘the correct answer’ now could it?) This weekend I got myself reacting that way and, remembering my Wakefield Doctrine Principles,  thought, “well, he is a clark, so his route should be the same as I would have come up with”. And so, I followed his route and found my self both appreciating and approving of the choices (mostly in the sequence of the path)…. I could see that there was only one best route and he had picked it, pretty much, exactly as I would have. Like worldviews result in like decisions.

Situation 2: ”dodging bullets’

So, this weekend,  I had a certain task, I missed a step and there was about to be a situation where things might get very, very ugly. The moment came and, as it turned out, everything would be alright. As I left the room, I thought, “well Clark, you’ve dodged another bullet” and the second thing ( I thought)  was, “so what does the Wakefield Doctrine have to offer?”

Wakefield Doctrine Principle: the ‘everything Rule’ states that it is not that there are clarklike things that happen or scottian jobs or, even, rogerian interests and hobbies** rather than try to discern whether something is exclusively of one (of the three worldviews), (it isn’t),  we should focus on how a thing (or a job or an interest or hobby) manifests in the worldview of the other person. Take an easy example: upcoming event during which you are required to speak before an audience. It is not that one of the three might be better or worse at this, it is each of the three personality types experience this ‘speaking before an audience’ as a different thing. That is what we mean by ‘manifest’. Remember, one of the goals of applying the Principles of the Wakefield Doctrine is to be in a position to ‘see the world as the other person is experiencing it’.

So I thought, ‘well situations and circumstances like this are not that un-common and surely down through the ages clarks and scotts and rogers have survived this type of live/die, on/off, win/lose, lady/tiger life events, I wonder how ‘the other two’ would experience ‘dodging another bullet‘”

  1. clarks:  ‘Well, I guess I successfully dodged a bullet, this time’
  2. scotts: ‘I dodged that one!! Who wants to take another shot?!!! come on!!! it’s fun!!!’
  3. rogers: ‘Who the hell is shooting at me and why would they want to?’

Musical humor:

 

* ‘the perfect route’ is one that there is no wasted  driving, one path naturally leading to the next, without any, god forbid, doubling back… the mark of a poor route, indeed!

** there are, but that’s not what we’re talking about here

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