relationships | the Wakefield Doctrine

TToT -the Wakefield Doctrine- ‘six word thankfuls’ now why didn’t I think of ….?’

September 5, 2015 By clarkscottroger

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

As our intrepid founderess prepares for her Trip to the New World, it is incumbent on the co-host (and co-hostinae) to step up and say, “Hey! the TToT is a bloghop that attracts the best and the brightest, the rich and the poor, the illiterate and…. (no, wait, that doesn’t work), the crème del crème of the blogosphere. So if you know anyone like that, get them to join up this weekend!”

No. Seriously. It’s like that episode that time on, (well, on every single sitcom since I started watching TV, which would be about 1961. There was always an episode where, (one of), the parental units becomes indisposed and everyone in the family decides to help out and do whatever needs to be done and then when the mother/father/boss/teacher or whoever gets better and returns, they get all, ‘you’re all doing so well without me! I guess I’m not needed anymore!’ … of course this is followed by some predictable misunderstanding that seems to reinforce their conclusion and finally, just before the next to the last commercial, everyone stops being so self-sufficient or maybe (they decide to) mess up on purpose, all to convince the I’m-not-needed-anymore person that they are loved and whatever. TV has always been a strange place, in fact, the strangest place most of us have spent time in, until, of course, (the) blogosphere appeared!
So, at any rate, this is not about early TV sitcoms. This is much odder. This is about writing a TToT post.

I’ve always wanted to learn to write a simple and direct TToT post. And seeing how I’m enjoying zoe’s Thursday ‘hop ‘Six Sentence Stories’, well, it’s only natural to think, ‘hey! lets write a TToT Post with each of the Ten Thing (of Thankful) consisting of 6 words! Sure! that’s a great idea!’

1) Work: it aggravates and it satisfies

2) (the) BoSR/SBoR: rules for all, not rules at all

3) Gravity Challenge (blog): sharing goals is effort made less

4) Six Sentence Story (blog): six sentences the author’s life disguised

5) Una: not just a dog, …family member

6) thoughts on last week: Summer evaporating as the temperatures decrease

7) (the) SGV (aka the Seven Guard Virgins): guardians of the SBoR/BoSR, all hot!

8) the Wakefield Doctrine: …way of seeing, way of being

9) co-hostinae: clarks, scotts rogers from X-Chromeville

10) SR 1.3: chapter and verse, end of Post

Your hosts

A Fly on our (Chicken Coop) Wall, Amycake and the Dude, Considerings, Finding Ninee, Getting Literal, I Want Backsies, The Meaning of Me, Thankful Me, Uncharted, The Wakefield Doctrine

Join the Ten Things of Thankful Facebook Group

An InLinkz Link-up

-the Wakefield Doctrine- ‘…red sky at morning, stand under the awning ‘

September 1, 2015 By clarkscottroger

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

Of course, the reason there is a Wakefield Doctrine is (to) provide a tool to self-improve oneself.

the Wakefield Doctrine is a unique, useful (very useful) and fun way to better understand the behavior of the people in our lives. Really more of a[n] additional perspective on life, the Wakefield Doctrine begins by posing a very simple, (but deceptively difficult), question: ‘how does that person relate themselves to the world around them?’ The Wakefield Doctrine provides a set of personality types that, on the basis of the description of three distinct ‘worldviews’ (one’s personal reality), makes insight into the context from which a person makes decisions (all types of decisions, i.e. how to act, how to feel, what to think etc), very possible. This insight all puts you in the position of knowing more about that person. (Or, of course, ourselves, if we’re that ‘other person’ and, if you happen to be a clark, you are so that ‘other person’.) With the proper application of the principles of the Wakefield Doctrine, you need never again hear yourself say, “How could they go and do such a thing?! I really thought I knew them better than that!”

the Wakefield Doctrine proposes three characteristic ways a person relates themselves to the world around them:

(as) the Outsider (clark) this is the person who is quiet (to the point of invisibility), funny (if you can hear/understand them), a very good listener and (a) near-psychotically unselfish person who will do anything for their friends (except stop beating up on themselves)
(as would a) Predator (scott) fun? exciting? hell! how about exciting-fun creators?!? like that Tasmanian Devil, (on the old Warner Brothers cartoon), except some of them wear heels and LBD(s) to a level of effectiveness as to tempt the FDA to require a warning label… the male scotts are even more so, if for no other reason than the fact that they achieve that effect (on their intended audience/prey) by virtually any means, including, but not limited to, jumping on the hood of a moving car, make really loud digestive (and post-digestive) sounds and generally being exciting to be with, (be sure to have the name of a bail bondsman in your pocket before heading out for the evening with them).
(in the manner of) a Member of the Herd (roger) you want to see how they get those scale model, 4-masted sailing vessels into the bottle? do you need to have someone express an astounding level of enthusiastic interest in what you have to say, hate to forget which is the salad fork and which is the cake fork?? find yourself a roger! they’ll be glad to show you and teach you the history of tablecloths while they’re at it!

the goal of this understanding as to how a person relates themselves to the world around them? simple. it’s in pursuit of better understanding. appreciation. identification. We strive to become able to see the world ‘as the other person is experiencing it’ and if that does nothing else, it will put us in a much better position to understand the people in our lives.

And… and! you’ll know what the other person will do, sometimes even before they do! No! seriously! With a sound understanding of the principles of the Wakefield Doctrine, you will know way more about the other person than you have any right to know. …fun, too.

Filed Under: Featured, Psychology, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: personality types, relationships, self-development, self-improvement, the Wakefield Doctrine, three personality types

TToT -the Wakefield Doctrine- ‘…of morning showers and early sunsets’

August 29, 2015 By clarkscottroger

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

Others describe this bloghop much more eloquently, emphasizing the value of (a) sharing of gratitude, re-enforcing, (or reinforcing, I suspect, in some circles, both could apply), the strength imparted from a long tradition in demonstrating self-examination and the resultant life-enhancing development of skills allowing truer expression and, therefore, increased appreciation of the positive side of life.

This being the Wakefield Doctrine, I thought, ‘well, they have the normal good stuff covered, how about the other elements that are inherent in a practice such as this, what about them?!’ So, I am totally grateful for:

1) The fact that this community is made up of people who enjoy the non-…… normal, rather than threaten by it. The TToT invites all of us to share the things for which we are grateful. It’s sorta of expected that there be Ten Things…. if, for no other reason than, the ‘Some-Number-Depending-On-Your-Week Things of Thankful’ url was already taken.

2) The fact that concepts like hypo-gratitude, an example of which I’ll cite in #3, is considered a valid Grat List item. (To the un-initiate, the idea that a bloghop that is focused on cultivating gratitude, would allow items reflecting things that we really kinda hate, might seem a bit…. off-putting.) I will maintain that it is the very opposite. In the real world things are not always good. And, while many here at the TToT do a remarkable job of taking a bad thing (incident, event, whatever) and find the perspective that converts the negative into the positive, or at very least, into the not so negative, is a true expression of the underlying principles of a gratitude exercise. Well, hypo-gratitude items are like that… if you go to the trouble of expressing it in a way that the others can understand and identify with, then you have surely left behind the toxic negativity that is usually a part of the negatives that we encounter in our day-to-day lives.

3) Hypo-gratitude item: Since June, when I take a shower*, I set the faucet (one of those single dial things) at about ‘5:00 o’clock’. Comfortable. Yesterday…. morning shower and ‘5:00 o’clock’ was…. cold! Surely one of the most fundamental ways to be reminded of the inevitable change of the seasons. (I won’t even mention how ‘not-still-light’ at a reasonable time in the evening things are these days.)

4) The people, (all virtual), who ‘enjoy’ the Gravity Challenge. Kristi and Christine and Lisa and Val and Joy . All, ( I assume), enjoy the process of the Challenge for different reasons. I, for one, find that the coolest thing about it is that, on one level, we all can identify with each other. (Sure, it’s a very, very small, quite focused and specialized aspect of a person’s life, but the magic of ‘identification’ is that I can say to a another person, ‘I know how you feel’.

5) The Six Sentence Story with headmistrae zoe. (Despite the fact that, in High School, I was this close to being named the, ‘Most Likely to be Mistaken for an English Teacher at virtually any Stage of Life’, I saw no value in learning to write. ( Hey! Come on! I was 17 years old, it was 1969 and loud music had just been invented! What use did I have for gerunds and participles? If it didn’t cure acne or promise to make me less of an awkward semi-geek, I did not have time for it.) Of course, today I’m scrambling to make up for the lack of skills with the written word and such. In fairness to me, most bloggers seem to be women (who are former girls) and god knows you people never had the desperate, near-psychotic levels of drive to be acceptable by the opposite sex that was de rigueur for those of us who grew up in Y Chromia. ( I suppose, to be fair, I should qualify that last statement. The ‘desperation’ of those days of adolescent agony didn’t really apply to my (caveman) scottian classmates, or, and ‘stepford husbands’ that were the rogers in high school.) Where was I? zoe and the 6 Sentence Stories! What a great learning opportunity! I write and I read what the others do (with the same prompt) and I learn. And I get better. Thanks z (and Josie)

6) We can’t have a TToT without expressing gratitude for one of the single coolest features of this here bloghop here, the Book of Secret Rules (aka the Secret Book of Rules). It is license to be creative, it is (an) invitation to flaunt the Rules, (such as they are), and it adds another dimension to writing Gratitude Posts. very cool

7) Dyanne…. she wrote a fun Six Sentence Story this week. (The fun was, itself, a manifestation of what it is that’s so incredible about the blogosphere. For those with sufficiently developed powers of Imagination (and his sexier sister, Visualization), it’s like writing and producing your own TV shows. Way better than what’s on the ‘real’ TV) btw…. I have never had dark hair, even back in the day… you’d be better off to think more, what’s his name, Fabio… yeah, light color hair… ( about as long, ‘cept less straight and more… bozo fro…)

8) Phyllis and Una

9) Well, ‘where is the day-to-day, real life happenings that most people write about being grateful for?’ might be a valid question. I need to get back to you on that, ok? (Update! real world/real time content!! (oh boy lets see what exotic and interesting things happen in our day-to-day-world!) 7:01 am Saturday:

“why no, officer, I do not have a permit to run a petting zone! Haven’t you ever seen a Lithuanian Short-haired Shepherd before?

(psst!! Mrs Bambi, yo get the frickin kids outta here! alright, the fawn. just lay low, it’s gonna be hunting season soon.)

10) 1.3

* no, I took showers before June!! It’s just the point is about Summer, you know?!

Your hosts

A Fly on our (Chicken Coop) Wall, Amycake and the Dude, Considerings, Finding Ninee, Getting Literal, I Want Backsies, The Meaning of Me, Thankful Me, Uncharted, The Wakefield Doctrine

Join the Ten Things of Thankful Facebook Group

An InLinkz Link-up

Filed Under: Featured, Psychology, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: personality types, relationships, the Wakefield Doctrine

Six…that’s right! all it is, is Six Sentences comprising a Story -the Wakefield Doctrine-

August 27, 2015 By clarkscottroger

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

Tough one. At least it’s striking me so, here at 12:30 am Thursday the 27th, as I sit at my computer, typing, near-automatically with similar ambition, (to the automatic writers of old), hoping against hope that the very motion of the pen (or keyboard), will be mother (or father) to art. Maybe they were on to something.

‘The Project that was projected was to project as much of the project to as many of the people comprising the Project.

To Project, speaking from a faux psychoanalytic perspective, is, in part, to attribute (project) onto to people, places and things in ones’ world, the attributes and characteristic that one attributes to oneself but would really rather not accept.’
Luckily this is only this week’s Six Sentence Challenge and all I have to do is finish and submit and then go one with life, which has enough difficulties in it without having to contend with zoe’s latest deviously simply word prompt.

Man! this is a tough one…

Awake, thank god that night is over!

Tossed and turned all night, chased by worry and hobbled by loss of confidence, surely, (so spoke the voices of the night), there is no way to get through this next set of challenges.

Coffee to stimulate the mind, producing the illusion (maybe even the allusion) of being capable of efficient and effective action.

The caffeine, (a delightfully psycho-active part of a complete breakfast, ‘the Best to me each morning’), surely the Lord Chamberlain of morning, has me convinced that my worries of the past night were simply that… worries, not real at all; the reality of this morning in front of the computer with a cup of coffee on the desk is what is real and all of the tossing and turning of the night were merely projections and everyone knows, they are but shadow shows, the illusion of action and character and can’t be the actual world, otherwise I might find myself caught in them, like last night’s seemingly endless struggle, and that would be….

…Tough one.

At least it’s striking me so, here at 12:30 am Thursday the 27th, as I sit at my computer, typing, near-automatically with similar ambition (to the automatic writers of old), hoping against hope that motion of the pen (or keyboard) will be mother (or father) to art. Maybe they were on to something…

Filed Under: Featured, Psychology, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: predicting human behavior, psychology of personality, relationships, the Wakefield Doctrine

Leadership, Passion and clarks -the Wakefield Doctrine- (of parentheses and conversation, it’s Friday Monday and the pressure is finally off (for the rogers and scotts, that is!)

August 24, 2015 By clarkscottroger

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

Once again, we have Friends of the Doctrine to thank for an interesting Post topic. Our friend Cynthia wrote, in a Comment, the other day,

“And…and…clarks. I need to do some learnin’ about bringing out the “leadership” quality in a clark. You know: making those 60-second decisions, not backing down, managing a lot of people. That sort of thing. Not a very clark-thing to do at all. :P“

“:P” indeed!

(I was just thinking, ‘My reply to Cynthia, the other day was pretty comprehensive and, well, lets just say, ‘the post is almost complete with a couple of copy/paste(s)’, go ahead! who’s gonna object?’)

I’ll compromise and put the Reply, (my response to our friend’s Comment), somewhere else. Actually this will be quite useful in allowing me to experiment with an idea for using un-categorized Posts as secret hiding places. So, if you would like to read my response to Cynthia’s excellent Post-topic-to-be, click here.

To the topic on hand! One that I started writing about this August 19th and am only just now publishing it, which is not, as it turns out a bad thing. The reason is that in the intervening time, discussion ensued, specifically, what might we suggest to Cynthia as (possible) paths to explore as she continues on with the remarkable tale of profession and personal development?

(New Readers? note here. the Wakefield Doctrine, besides being a lot of fun is also a tool for understanding the people in our lives, which includes ourselves… as people in our lives. Now the thing about the Doctrine is that we do not claim to have ‘the Answer’, hell, we don’t even insist that our way (of looking at the world) is ‘the Better Way’. All we say is that the Wakefield Doctrine provides an additional perspective on life and the world and dealing with that pain-in-the-ass guy at the deli counter at the Stop ‘n Shop (and) the girl that we would really like to believe we have a shot with and (even) the new boss who seems to be going out of his way to be a first class dick, our emphasis here being, of course, on ‘additional’. We sincerely believe that the more we understand the people in our lives, the better our lives can be. So, the next time you find yourself saying, “I really thought I knew them better than that! How could they be so mean?” stop. remember the three worldviews, see if you can infer how that person is ‘relating themselves to the world around them’, (as an Outsider (clark) or a Predator (scott) or a Herd Member (roger). and then…. then do your best to see the world as they are experiencing it. If you do that, you will know them better. Maybe just a little better, maybe a lot better, but you will have a better understanding/appreciation of them.)

My! that certainly was a jumbo parenthetical aside! Back to our ‘discussion’. how do clarks become more effective leaders and managers? You’ll recognize, in these two, the worldview of scotts and rogers, respectively. It is fundamental to the Wakefield Doctrine that, while we all have only one predominant worldview (our personal reality), we retain the potential and capacity of ‘the other two’. We refer to these as our secondary and tertiary aspects.* At first blush, the ‘answer’ to Cynthia’s query might be thought to be ‘well, develop your secondary and tertiary aspects!’ And, in fact, that is the answer. However, the question remains, ‘how the heck does one do that?’

Hey! here’s what I’ve got: enthusiasm.

Yep! there it is. the answer.** Enthusiasm… or, as we presciently wrote in our Post Title…passion. That is the keystone, the touchstone, the abracadabra of accessing her secondary and tertiary aspects. Now, I alluded to discussion over the course of the weekend that contributed to a better understanding of this mechanism (in clarks). Remind me later in the week to tell you about it. Mention: spinner and hydraulics for cars and I’ll totally get what you mean.

Got to go to work.

* e.g. I am a clark with a strong secondary scottian and weak tertiary rogerian aspect(s) as a result I am a creative Outsider, but have at times found myself driven to act aggressively on the world at large, this blog being the best example of that effect.

** this is the answer specific to Cynthia’s Comment-question. It is applicable to clarks. If we were dealing with a roger or a scott, even with the same question, the answer would be different. Why? well because they have different set of rules, the worldview, the personal reality of (a) scott or (a) roger is different. It only makes sense, doesn’t it?