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Wodin -the Wakefield Doctrine- (…as our demographic changes, it behooves us to adjust, Post-from-Comment Wednesday!)

February 4, 2015 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

"…walk the boy, Lassie, walk the boy… like I got nothing better to do"

“…’walk the boy, Lassie, walk the boy’,  like I got nothing better to do”

 

“…So there’s this Roger in my life, (with a strong Scottian aspect), who always asks my Clark for her opinion, because Clarks know a lot about things. But she never opts for my opinion. What’s going on there? Plus I have another little scenario. I’m remembering a party I had at my new house with some neighborhood acquaintances. There was a guy, a member of the Volunteer Fire Department, (rogers right?-rule follower?) As we took the tour, he commented on how I should have this or this or this instead of that. I thought it was unsolicited advice and it annoyed me. This same person wore earplugs at a wedding recently because he thought the music was too loud. So Clark, what is your opinion? (Must be my Rogers talking)?”  (Val ‘My Virtual Vineyard’ )

“…I’m here again. I like to read. And since I am of a Clarkian nature, I am permitted to observe, correct?” ( Jen Kehl ‘Jen Kehl’ )

” …that’s very interesting about the roger-scott dynamic. …as a clark, try to be honest (sometimes to my utter detriment) and perhaps there HAVE been situations where I’ve said that and…it was awful. I said that a couple years ago when I went to a training and I hadn’t been “trained” and they “put me in charge of a group” – I acknowledged that I hadn’t had much training and that I probably didn’t know what I was doing. This is precisely why – I’ve figured out – the roger of the group strong-armed me and totally walked all over me. I was so mad…I didn’t let him have it, though. :P”  (Cynthia  ‘…the ‘tude, of course! ‘ )

We are very fortunate to have outstanding Comments. It’s almost as if they write a got portion of the Posts that you’ll find here! (I believe all of the Commentationers on the Post today are in possession of some form of Official Wakefield Doctrine fashion items… tres cool!) So, …to the Comments!

Hey… running out of time!!  (What to do, what to do? …. did I hear someone say   BULLET POINTS!!!!)*

(As a Reply to All Comments, sub-sections of Comments, inferences, innudenae and ‘my point is as plain as the nose on your face’, …in no particular order**):

  • ‘the Everything Rule’ cautions us to not assume that there is anything in life that is exclusively of one of the three worldviews, instead, we are charged with asking the critical question, ‘how does, (fill in your choice of activity/hope/aspiration/ambition/occupation/avocation/favorite pastime/bad habit or  famous saying), manifest in that person’s predominant worldview?’
  • having said that, there are ‘things in life’ that is more worldview-friendly to one personal reality over ‘the other two’ worldviews, i.e.  rogers make ‘the best’ firefighters, scotts make ‘the best’ cops and clarks… and clarks…. and… lol  (hold on!! it’s there…er  ‘clarks make the best something something …’)
  • there is hope! the Wakefield Doctrine encourages us,  not to become something we are not, but to become more of what we may be… the Doctrine maintains that, while we all grow up and live in one worldview (our predominant worldview), we retain the potential of ‘the other two’
  • …it is not easy….worse! it’s not natural (which is why clarks have a bit of an edge on scotts and rogers when it comes to self-developing ourselfs
  • (giving) un-solicited advice is common with rogers, however the key question is “…exactly how annoyed”  (that’s not phrased precisely as it should be… the everything rule for something this…small?!! absolutely!
  • ‘it annoyed me’:
    • scotts: …what??!  lol fuck you!
    • clarks:  (“what a jerk, doesn’t anyone else hear what a jerk that guy is being…I have half a mind to say something, if I did, it would be…”)
    • rogers: ‘huh… maybe I should help everyone put what this guy is saying into a more useful context, he’s clearly over-stepping his bounds”
  • is this still on? holy smokes! it works!  nested-damn-bullet-points!!
  • clarks are, in fact, sought out for opinion (and, more often, as a sympathetic listener…no matter what the issue or who the person is, clarks listen better than anyone!  now, before you object!  note! I did not say ‘clarks listen…and help/make the speaker feel better/come up with a plan’  just that we listen. (of course, this single trait is beyond price, if I may be so bold… there are times when a person simply needs to speak of things, that’s what clarks do so well.  (the listening, not the speaking…lol)
  • clarks are permitted to observe….hell! we do that by virtue of our reality… the real challenge is in taking what we learn and tricking ourselves into identifying with the people and activities and things that we observe… that’s when the real change, the true benefits of the Wakefield Doctrine are to be found!

 

 

 

* Thank you Christine… not that you really said it, but, had you been in the metaphorical auditorium, there is a better than even chance you would have been yelling,  “Bullet point this sucker so we can get to the payoff… I paid good money to get in here and I want the secret!!”

** hey, If there’s one thing that I think I’m coming to understand about this personality theory business, it’s, ‘trust the Readers to understand, if they don’t then it’s up to them to ask’ (thanks Molly!)

 

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Mondant -the Wakefield Doctrine- true life situations, real Doctrine principles…and musical humor!

February 2, 2015 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

images-2

So I was saying, just the other day, I said, ‘you know, the hardest thing about trying to write the Wakefield Doctrine book is that, despite the fact that it, (the Doctrine), can be applied to unlimited life situations (for insight or laughter-based purposes), when I get to a section where I need to say, ‘for example, in this common life situation, one might apply the Doctrine as follows’  I draw a total blank!’.  The other person laughed and said, ‘hey! sucks to be you!’  In any event, I had two experiences this weekend that I would like to offer as examples of the Wakefield Doctrine proving itself useful.

Situation 1: Maps, Directions and clarks

Part of my work involves working with another clark. (Another) part of my work involves inspecting properties. This weekend I needed to ‘cover’ the inspections that normally, my associate clark would do. There were 5 houses in a nearby city. I had the list and was beginning to check the google map (for best route) and my associate said, ‘here start with this property and then….’ and proceeded to give me directions…

Wakefield Doctrine Principle: clarks are good at couple of things: a) having a sense of direction 2) visualizing

… so, not only was I not needing directions, I was enjoying the prospect of mapping out the perfect route*. However,  I was pressed for time and left with the suggested sequence of houses on a piece of paper. (I should stop at this point and remind the Reader that clarks sometimes think that they are in sole possession of ‘the correct answer’ and, if someone else were to offer an alternative, well, by definition, it couldn’t be ‘the correct answer’ now could it?) This weekend I got myself reacting that way and, remembering my Wakefield Doctrine Principles,  thought, “well, he is a clark, so his route should be the same as I would have come up with”. And so, I followed his route and found my self both appreciating and approving of the choices (mostly in the sequence of the path)…. I could see that there was only one best route and he had picked it, pretty much, exactly as I would have. Like worldviews result in like decisions.

Situation 2: ”dodging bullets’

So, this weekend,  I had a certain task, I missed a step and there was about to be a situation where things might get very, very ugly. The moment came and, as it turned out, everything would be alright. As I left the room, I thought, “well Clark, you’ve dodged another bullet” and the second thing ( I thought)  was, “so what does the Wakefield Doctrine have to offer?”

Wakefield Doctrine Principle: the ‘everything Rule’ states that it is not that there are clarklike things that happen or scottian jobs or, even, rogerian interests and hobbies** rather than try to discern whether something is exclusively of one (of the three worldviews), (it isn’t),  we should focus on how a thing (or a job or an interest or hobby) manifests in the worldview of the other person. Take an easy example: upcoming event during which you are required to speak before an audience. It is not that one of the three might be better or worse at this, it is each of the three personality types experience this ‘speaking before an audience’ as a different thing. That is what we mean by ‘manifest’. Remember, one of the goals of applying the Principles of the Wakefield Doctrine is to be in a position to ‘see the world as the other person is experiencing it’.

So I thought, ‘well situations and circumstances like this are not that un-common and surely down through the ages clarks and scotts and rogers have survived this type of live/die, on/off, win/lose, lady/tiger life events, I wonder how ‘the other two’ would experience ‘dodging another bullet‘”

  1. clarks:  ‘Well, I guess I successfully dodged a bullet, this time’
  2. scotts: ‘I dodged that one!! Who wants to take another shot?!!! come on!!! it’s fun!!!’
  3. rogers: ‘Who the hell is shooting at me and why would they want to?’

Musical humor:

 

* ‘the perfect route’ is one that there is no wasted  driving, one path naturally leading to the next, without any, god forbid, doubling back… the mark of a poor route, indeed!

** there are, but that’s not what we’re talking about here

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**** -the Wakefield Doctrine- “***, BoSR/SBoR,***”

January 31, 2015 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

20150127_134225_resized_1

This is our weekend bloghop, the Ten Things of Thankful, started by Lizzi Rogers and sustained by 8 remarkable hostinae. Each week, bloggers are invited to share the parts of their lives that engender a feeling of thankfulness and gratitude. As a bloghop, this, the TToT has a certain…attitude that stands out in, (an area), of the blogosphere that is, how to put this elegantly,  lousy with good writers, clever ideas and excellent presentation. What quality this, bloghop-that-Lizzi-created, has is ‘community’. (I know, I know, most of you are groaning and saying to each other, “‘com mune it tee’ that’s for girls!! we’re outa here” I will say,  ‘well maybe  but we have a Book of Secret Rules (aka the Secret Book of Rules)’.   I thought that might change your minds! More about that later. So, welcome to the TToT (or, to be more accurate, welcome to one aspect of the TToT (‘one aspect of the TToT’ motto: ‘you say you want to, like, turn off the censor and write whatever you please and still have people read your Post? You’ve come to the right place‘)

Ten things…how hard can it be? This week you’ll be enjoying reading how people present their list of ‘Ten Things’, in ways as varied as the writers who create them.

1) Una. She enjoys the snow, as the photo above makes abundantly clear.

2) I am grateful for the quirk in my personality that has created in me a pleasure center built upon the act of shoveling. (no! I’m totally serious! We all know people who derive pleasure from certain less than common activities, (…besides that),  hobbies like wood carving and crochetteting or maybe arranging colored sand in intricate patterns. For such people, it a source of pleasure and satisfaction that is not derived from the direct product of their efforts, in fact, I would offer that there is some innocent life experience in their childhood years that, combined with available activities and encouragement become …fun.  Well, I get that from using a shovel. Could be digging a hole in summer or shoveling the lawn in winter. (as a 13 yo, I once shoveled the snow off the backyard at my house… the entire backyard. My parents were upset.) In any event, I enjoy shoveling snow, and this is good because Una is a fairly small dog (50 lbs) and the snow this week at least 24″ worth… and so I dug some paths out into the yard so she could get to a section where there are trees and the snow was not so deep.)

3) I am hypo-grateful for the fact of the snow, but I temper this with an appreciation of the fact that it’s the end of January. In years past, we’ve had storms like the one this week in December! That makes for a long winter.( added bonus Grat: we live in a fairly rural area. It’s very windy this morning, as I write this. Not only can I hear the wind howl, but I can hear it howling in the distance… you know, you hear the growing sound of the gust as it starts in the far distance, it grows, but then (this is the cool part this morning), then the gust goes after someone else…. not me! The sound grows (as the gust approaches) but sometimes you can hear it veering off before it hits the trees around your house. See? did you hear that?  like a train, very close but none of the trees surround our house (and they’re Pine Tress so they make a fairly cool sound when the wind blows, what with all the needles and such)… you know that the wind found someone else to mess with…)

4) Book of Secret Rules (aka the Secret Book of Rules) one of the features of this bloghop that makes it possible for people like me to participate, nay! be a co-hostmagnissamus of the bloghop* and participate every week with barely a hint of self-consciousness (which makes up for those horrible years spent at William Golding Junior High… trouble is, there’s no way…well, no legal way I can find some of my classmates and beat them up (or have them beat up). oh well.  The Book!  that’s what this Gratitude Item is about! Very Simple: we have a blog hop that asks participants to write a list of the 10 Things that they are grateful for…if for reasons beyond your control (yes, Christine,  like an over-active imagination encouraged by a totally stunted sense of decorum…) you are not able to produce a list of 10 Items, you may provide an alternate list. The catch is you must cite the Book of Secret Rules (aka the Secret Book of Rules) and then everyone will be watching, so it’s not what I would call a ‘Get Out of Jail Free Card’

5) * BoSR(SBoR) chap 69 sec 14: anyone who uses a term like ‘nay!’ or ‘verily’ in an Item without resorting to a ‘lol’ to cover up for the essentially giggle-inducing phrase is entitled

6) (chap 60 sec 14.5) 2 free Items.

7) this weekend’s work will have to be listed as semi-hypo-grateful… not just the weather conditions, hell I spent several winters on the deck of a commercial fishing boat where the cold and the wind were such that the spray off the bow would turn into hail and sting like a bastard when it hit you in the face… no, it’s the stress of the work. Which, speaking only for myself, is pretty much all self-induced. Well, let me rephrase that, ‘the challenges of the work I do is the ostensible reason for stress, the unalterable fact of the matter is that I am responsible for allowing these reasons to be experienced as ‘stress’.  Fortunately for me, one of the tools at my disposal for dealing with this is, Item 8: ‘ the Wakefield Doctrine’

8) I am grateful this week for the Wakefield Doctrine, both as a tool for my understanding of myself as well as a way to enjoy the day and the people in it.

9) You might think I would’ve taken advantage of the the BoSR/SBoR to jump right to Secret Rule 1.3, but I’m grateful for the fact that I did not. Instead, I think I’ll pimp the movie that I saw a couple of weeks ago. ‘Predestination’… with Ethan Hawke a new release on video. You should rent it this weekend. It is family friendly, but I suspect a lot of people will not enjoy it. It’s arguably the best ‘time travel paradox’ movie I have ever seen. Those of you with children… not sure which of the kids are clarks?  try this movie out. (What? you want another movie to help identify the clarks in your family?  say no more! ‘Slacker’ by Richard Linklater  now, you put this movie on with a couch full of people and I guarantee that the scotts and the rogers will not last 5 minutes and the clarks will be sitting there mesmerized (with that laughsmile on their faces).

10) Even though there is still only rudimentary language developed to account for the benefit of identifying with other clarks, I am grateful for that simple and stupendous offshoot of this Wakefield Doctrine blog. That I can identify and identify with, other clarks is, simply, one of the top 5 significant events in my life (and yes, that is one of the three… jeez!)

* footnotes and such

 

 

Ten Things of Thankful

 

 Your hosts

Join the Ten Things of Thankful Facebook Group


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Twensday -the Wakefield Doctrine- ‘…it was a clark and stormy night‘ day, day! and, kinda boring towards the end too!’

January 28, 2015 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

1920px-Ferdinand_Hodler_005

The last Comment/Reply to yesterday’s day-before-yesterday’s Post serves perfectly to start us off today,

“I’d totally be calling “shotgun.” ” ( Dyanne ‘Backsies‘  …scott )

“We knew that… (well, this is the Wakefield Doctrine!)”  ( clark…. clark )

now, before you think, ‘well he knows her’… (or) ‘she hasn’t really said anything other than where she would sit’… (or) ‘but your answer it doesn’t really tell us anything that we didn’t know!’

Fair enough.

Yesterday’s Post was concerned with, ‘what the Doctrine is’, today we will address the question of ‘what the Doctrine does’

What does the Wakefield Doctrine do? Is that what you want to know? well, is it?!  For starters it won’t: make your husband stop being so picky, (or) give you the power so you can simply change your child, (the one who has so much potential, but all he wants to do is read those books), to stop him  being so hard on himself when playing with the other kids (or) your friend, who you love dearly, but every time you go somewhere public, there’s a scene (not such an outrageous scene, at least not anymore, back when you were all young…wellll! it seemed that the minute you’d walk into the bar…she would somehow do something that made you three the center of attention and what you had hoped would be a nice evening with your two best friends would end up with you:  frantically waving down a cab/ telling her new friend’s buddy that you really aren’t interested and/or hitting someone on the head with a bottle)

so… you want to know what the Wakefield Doctrine can do?  Ok, rather than go into a long list of what it can’t do (which I seem to have already made a good start at), I’ll tell you the two most valuable things that things that using the Wakefield Doctrine skillfully, can allow you to do:

  1. you can know the other person better than they know themselves, with insights into the reasons for their behavior, knowledge that you have no right to know
  2. you can ‘see the world as the other person is experiencing it’
  3. (for a certain percentage of you out there), you can begin to build a ‘place to stand’  a place (within) that might just be above the emotional water line… a place that is not periodically washed away by the horrible price of being …what you believe you are

There! is that enough for you?

(Follow up on newest Doctrine blogroll member, Val’s scenario in Coments:

  • which of those three young ladies will be assigned photographer duties,
  • which will be ‘the self’ in most of the evening selfless and…. here’s a really tough one!  of the three…
  • which of the three will ‘mis-remember’ how the evening went…at least when telling ‘the Evening’s Tale’ back at the office the next day?*

 

* no, sorry Lizzi and zoe are prohibited from answering the bonus Question… lets let the newer Readers have some of the fun of answering the questions (especially, the fun of that dawning realization and you start to answer one way and then it occurs to you…. ‘wait! she’s just like….”)

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-the Wakefield Doctrine- “Ladies and Gentlemen, this is a personality theory”

January 26, 2015 By

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

…we did mention that the Doctrine is anecdotal, right? above? …anecdotal football, if ever I saw one

…we did mention that the Doctrine is anecdotal, right? above? …anecdotal football, if ever I saw one

(Today’s Post’s subtitle is, of course, (the) paraphrased tagline of a famous speech by football coach, Vince Lombardi.  Given that we’re at the height of football season (Height of Football Season motto: “Open enrollment for the Herd!! you’re all rogers…. provided you’re willing to paint your face and tolerate near-criminal activity in the name of cheering for the home team!!!!” ).

Over the course of the weekend there were enough Reader remarks, comments, asides and vague innuendae about the understandability of the Wakefield Doctrine, that I thought, ‘What the hell, lets see if I can’t give a ‘This is the Wakefield Doctrine speech’.

Rather than go back and mine one of the 1268 Posts that, when all is said and done, are each an attempt to explain the Wakefield Doctrine in a manner that allows a New Reader to read, understand, apply and enjoy this here personality theory here, I thought… hey! it’s Sunday evening. Lets write a ‘new’ explanation of the Wakefield Doctrine!

the Wakefield Doctrine is a way of looking at the people in our lives, that can, when properly applied, lead to understanding them in ‘additional ways’. By ‘additional ways’, we mean… ‘what am I doing that is an integral aspect in how they are acting?

(…. “Ladies and Gentleman this is ‘an inflated leather spindle torus'”  sorry, lol… I was trying to write ‘the speech’, but thought about the ‘setup’…post game speech… locker room… various states of dress…demographics of the current readership…. me standing on a bench (in that locker room)….lol)  wait! wait!  let me try again.

The Comments that got me on this theme (the basics of the Wakefield Doctrine, not the locker room) were:

  • “I’m still learning this clark roger secret rule thing… yes one day I will…”  (Kimberly at ‘…something something’ ) 
  • ” And remember, I am embracing my Clark-like self this week.” (Val of ‘Virtual Vineyard’)
  • “…thankful for your WD info and thankful to be understanding it more and better” (Lisa over at Meaning of Me’) 

Let me try to be more reality tv show about this explanation. Kimberly (who, of the three, is the one I would bet would ‘call shotgun!’ first,  is in the front seat and Val and Lisa are in the back  and we’re driving through Wakefield on a Saturday night.**)

After driving past the Guild and heading into Wakefield proper, I look in the rear view mirror and begin:

the Wakefield Doctrine is a perspective. It’s a way to see the world, it’s a way to understand the behavior of the people in our lives. It’s not an Answer, it’s a Question. And…. (hey!! Val!! please!!! no leaning out the window and shouting at the people in the CVS parking lot!!! come on! they’re on serious, old person/sick person business!!  thank you. )  the Question is:  ‘how does my spouse/the girl at the 7/11,  / the Teacher who is shaping my 7 year old’s life/ the people I read about in the news… how do they appear to be ‘relating themselves to the world around them’?’  The Wakefield Doctrine proposes that we all live in a personal reality (aka worldview) that is characterized as (one) of the following:

  1. live as ‘the Outsider’ (clarks) always apart from, different, trying to understand what it is they don’t understand, trapped by the belief that it is about knowledge
  2. the world of the Predator (scotts) seemingly confident (always looking for threats and opportunity), active and impulsive  running into doors as often as gallantly opening them, protective and paranoid
  3. the life of the Herd Member (rogers)  self-assured, as the world of the roger is one that is quantifiable/(and limited), knowable/(and ignorable) ordered and simple… searching only for ‘the Right Way’/ missing the enjoyment of the un-expected and strange

What the Wakefield Doctrine refers to as ‘personality types’ is simply the skill set we develop in order to successfully cope with the reality that we find ourselves growing up in and living our lives in … (‘no Kimberly… we can’t stop for donuts…. we have to drive to Galilee next…. yes,  Lisa  I will try to walk on the water… very funny’). So what we are saying with the Doctrine is this: understand the three worldviews, infer how the other person is relating themselves to the world around them and they will do the rest.  No, I’m serious! Ask anyone! Once you start to see the clarks, scotts and rogers in your life, they will ‘act the part’ to a degree that is sometimes a little scary. But fun..  The goal of all of this is: to try to see the world as the other person is experiencing it.

It takes imagination. It takes the kind of curious mind that not only is capable of, but enjoys imagining that a person is a Predator (figuratively) or creative perfectionist or… or even the person who is ever the Outsider, but always manages to be a part of…secretly, of course!

…ok everyone out! we’re back.

 

** which, by the way, is not a symbol, metaphor, allusion or made up place… there is a Wakefield, Rhode Island and I do drive through it on virtually every Saturday Night***

*** doing the Wakefield Doctrine Saturday Night Drive Call-in….

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