Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

Perhaps we could interest you in a little RePrint?

Come on! You know you want to… it’s been a long week and despite knowing that a ‘proper’ original content Post is always good for the curious and discerning Reader, sometimes all a blogger wants is a bowl of cereal in front of the TV watching X-Files (or if you’re really *ld, the Man from Uncle).

Full Disclosure: This is, in fact, a rather informative post centered on a actual Doctrine Reader’s ‘question’. From back in… “Danger Will Robinson! Danger!! Depressing Calendar Mathematics ahead!”

(Everything Rule, Misky, your challenge is to step to the side and view this from the perspective of the Everything Rule. ha ha… look at us,  indulging in being a roger! aka assuming we know what someone else is thinking… wait.a.darn.minute! that’s not indulging in being a roger… it’s being a clark (back us up on this one Mimi? Denise? Cynthia? ;p)

hey, a little link-dropping ain’t such a bad way to end the wordk week, is it?

the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers) ‘…a unique, productive and fun insight into the behavior of the people in our lives’

April 23, 2013

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

As promised, we will now address the question on the minds of many Readers,  “…what the hell good is this Doctrine thing? We’ve read the Posts and freely admit that we like the sound of this theory of clarks, scotts and rogers.  It all makes sense but… enough with the allegory and theory! Lets hear what it can do to help with real life situations and such!”

 

From Friend of the Doctrine Amy:

I guess I would really like to know how to manage these scotts effectively without getting all worked up and out of whack. Do you know what I mean? I stay all calm for the most part and then they push and insist and try to tell me what I think (even though I know quite well what I think and it’s not what they want me to think)….and then I get mad and very direct and maybe a little more assertive than I am comfortable with. It takes me another two days to calm down after such a confrontation. Can you tell I just had such a confrontation? It’s three days later and I’m still thinking / analyzing / worrying about it. And I’m sure the Scott in questions never gave it a second thought!

Thanks Amy! (Amy is a Friend of the Doctrine who writes ‘Adorable Chaos’ …more than just a mommyblog, her observations and insights, while often focused on family and teaching, have a certain subtle edge (and secret humor) that you will enjoy reading it.) This is a great Question!

…next question?¹

You’ve heard the saying,  ‘the Wakefield Doctrine is for you, not for them’, lets start with the second of the two questions implicit in the above scenario.

“…It’s three days later and I’m still thinking / analyzing / worrying about it.”²

Remember the last time you got all, “…I-can-rake-the-whole-yard!-I’ve-got-it-halfway-done-already-I-can’t-stop-now!” ?
Now recall what we say about the three personality types: clarks think, scotts act and rogers feel.
What we mean by this is not just that we clarks are given to introspection or scotts go from impulsive act to impulsive act, or even that rogers change moods like a girl changes clothes… no! we mean that, (in our respective worldviews), this is how we are.

Your feeling ‘out of sorts’ for days after your successfully overcoming the attempt by a scott to dominate you, is simply being stiff and sore, just like if you raked the whole damn yard on a Saturday afternoon in October.  Now, being a clark, what you need to ease the aches (god, don’t you love metaphors stretched almost to their breaking points?),  is something rational, yet still in the realm of what got you sore in the first place.³, i.e. exerting yourself dealing with a scott.
So, next time this happens, after you have overcome the scott in question, but sooner than 3 days of reflection later, go back to them and remind them of whatever it was that you (finally) did to get them to stop and behave. Depending on how much time has passed (since) the initial confrontation, you will find yourself less and less inclined to do this, preferring to keep everything in your head, on familiar ground. You will think to yourself that it might be best to ‘let sleeping dogs lie’.  ( …lol)

Now lets consider the first question (inherent in) your most excellent scenario:

“…even though I know quite well what I think and it’s not what they want me to think… I’m sure the Scott in questions never gave it a second thought!”

You are totally correct. They did not, they do not.
That is the charm, the strength, the limitation, hell! it’s the definition of the scottian worldview. They act. They live in the here and now, they act on the basis of the immediate, not the abstract .
You do not.
However, if you keep in mind that scotts view dominance and ranking as simply the way the world is and not (this is critical and alien to a clark) … not as a statement of worth or value or anything like that, you will be able to deal with them in their context, but on your terms and everything will be a lot more better.  for you…. (they won’t understand any of this, but explanations are for clarks, not for scotts.)

I hope this helps, Amy. Thank you for the scenario, yo.

1)  ha ha come on! you didn’t see that coming? No?? you might be at the wrong blog then,  if you were looking for totally straight on, sincere- to-a-fault self-improvement advice, you might be better going somewhere else.

2) Any Reader who cannot identify with this, you better go to the section on clarks.

3)  but, like being sore after too much raking, the exercises here are most effective when done as soon after the exertion as possible.

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