Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine ( the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers )

So we have Mel and Nell, DS and ‘KH, Claire and even Molly (from the big square State in the middle of the Continent), stylin’ in theys Wakefield Doctrine Tee shirts! What controversy can that create? Why would not their lives be happy, serene and satisfying?

I’ll tell you why, dammit! When our Friends and DownSprings finish dressing their bodies, they will go out into the world at large where they will encounter people, who, though full of admiration and maybe a little envy, will say, “Heyyy! nice Tee Shirt! What the hell is a Wakefield Doctrine?”  or maybe they will glance at the front of our friends and say without embarrassment, “I appreciate the color and the fit, but you must tell me about the ‘theory of clarks, scotts and rogers‘!”

What is the best way to answer these interrogatives?

1. Say, ” I’m so happy you asked!” (if your gender is female): follow this statement with a clap of hands, (an) offer to hug or whatever else is appropriate; (if your gender is male): then offer ‘High 5″, knuckle bump or simply glare at them challengingly
2. Walk away, with as many hands as are available over your ears while singing, “La La La La…I think I can’t hear you now…La La La La!”
3. Smile and say, “clarks think, scotts act and rogers feel! Do you need any more information than that, scott/roger?”
4. Look at their faces, if they immediately smile (in a non-threatening manner) but look around to see who else heard them, they are a roger, if they immediately smile and say nothing, then you got a scott…don’t worry about clarks, they will have someone else ask
5. Put your hands over your ears, open your mouth and scream soundlessly.
6. Ask the person if they feel that they have the quality of flexible intelligence and, no matter what they answer, smile and start, “Well, in the early 1980’s clark was visiting scott at work…“
7. Say to them, “the Wakefield Doctrine is a productive and unique and totally fun tool for understanding the people in your life. You do have people in your life, don’t you?”
8. Say, ” Why thank you! I love my shirt but would rather not discuss the Wakefield Doctrine. You will respect my wishes, won’t you?”
9. (If you feel that this person is a scott), then look them in the eye and say, “You would not believe what this stands for!! People kinda get upset when I tell…maybe I should just leave it be,  you would only get upset!”
10. (If you feel the person is a roger) then look around a few times and lean in towards them and say, “I’m not supposed to talk about it! It’s kind of a secret club kinda thing…ya know?…everyone would get mad at me…I hope you don’t mind”
11. Ask the person to please repeat the question and when they have done so, say “That’s what I thought you said” and walk away.
12. Start running
13. Ask them to repeat the question. (If they do) tell them that the Wakefield Doctrine has a blog site (point to your back) and that if they really want to know about it, they need to visit the site and leave a Comment.
14. (Optional Response: Look at them and say, “I have been empowered to reveal that information only to people who meet the criteria. In your case…”)