Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)
It’s Saturday and it’s time for the Best Blog Hop on the internet! It’s the Ten Things of Thankful! It’s fun and it’s exciting, there are heart-warming stories and gut-wrenching life events there is even a free association corner! (some restrictions may apply! no one over the emotional age of 13 permitted in the free association corner without the express, written consent of a parent, guardian angel or blogwriter. So join Lizzi and her band of bloggerinae for this week’s episode!)
So after 5 days of the workweek, we are again here at the Saturday end of the week. Granted Saturdays no longer have the ‘day-off-do-weekend-chores’ vibe that many of us insist we felt when we were young children, it still has a certain quality, a change in the rhythm of way we try to cope with the world. The work that is demanded by school and work (and house-keeping, if you are a SAHM), while difficult and laborious, possesses the saving grace of a certain degree of predictability. We start Monday and expect the next 4 days to follow the pattern. For the 5 days of the traditional workweek we: buckle down to work, put in our 40 hours, get A’s, keep our nose to the grindstone, let the children watch the save stupid video time and time agin, remember why we have to study, get that promotion, go shopping and not cringe at the realization that a law degree did not obviate the need for a grocery list, suck up to that awful teacher, laugh at our supervisor’s dumb jokes, join the theatre club because it will look good on our college application, not cringe when the Manager puts his hands on our shoulder, try not to feel guilty at the joy we feel to leave the kids at home once the spouse gets back because you forgot one thing at the store...
The work week is also, oddly enough, less personal. This is strange, because, in today’s modern world, the majority of us spend most of our waking hours with the ‘not-immediate-family segment of the world’s population’. And when we are home, during the workweek, it’s all about the eat and sleep and be ready for the next workday.
So, why are weekends different? Because the weekends offer the potential of the ‘you-portion-of-life’. Doesn’t matter if you have one day or two, or (your weekend) is Tuesday and Fridays… our weekends are different. So…if I were 7 years old again and you snuck into my house on a Saturday morning to ask me what I was grateful for, then I might say:
1) I am grateful that I am able (better make that capable of) throwing away half of the list I just finished writing ’cause it just didn’t make sense! (yeah.. Dyanne, I know! you don’t want to know what it is that makes me react that way.
2) I am grateful for the realization that I am in re-write mode which is not as depressing as ‘what-the-hell-am-I-going-to-write-this-week’ mode
3) Some people I know have the weekend off, like they only work Monday through Friday… damn! I once had a job like that! I called it my ‘Ward Cleaver’ job start at 8:30 and ended at 5:00 every week day. I think I lasted about 2 years or so… but I met Bernadine at that job so it wasn’t a total loss…I am grateful for that (meeting Bernadine, not lasting 2 years or so)
4) I am grateful to be on this item, because that is the extent of the re-write necessary as a result of a failed premise in my set up… (I was trying to do a Ten Things list from the perspective of being a 7 year old clark… nice idea, couldn’t pull it off._
5) Wait til Christine gets a load of this (this phrase in italics was a ‘starter item’ from the first draft of this week’s list). Lately, if I’m pretending to not wait until Saturday morning to write my List, I’ll type out Items 1-10 and put something/anything on each line and then, when I come back on Saturday morning, I’m not facing a blank page. …it’s ok though, I told Lizzi that I was doing that and she didn’t get mad.
6) the Wakefield Doctrine. well, even though it might seem like a repetitious over-simplification, I am grateful for the Doctrine because without it, I wouldn’t be here struggling to come up with a list that, while not even attempting to conform to the standards of my ‘peer group’, will be acceptable under the category: ‘that one? oh… but he means well’
7) I will say that I am grateful for my job/work. I am not producing lists like today’s because I don’t care about anything or am not grateful for the good things I have and the bad things that I don’t have in my life. Rather, I am writing this because it allows me to participate in something with normal people and…and! I get to (try) to learn: a)writing skills and 2) sharing skills
8) hey! you want to hear something a little odd? no! seriously! well, I should say, this item might not make sense if you are not a clark (or do not have a secondary clarklike aspect) or if I don’t tell it right…anyway. I was at the office yesterday and an agent came in who I knew to be a clark, but she knows nothing of the Wakefield Doctrine. So I said, “hey Nancy! you’ll get this… ever be, like driving down a street that you’ve driven down a million times and all of a sudden, you look and you don’t recognize where you are?” (she looked a little startled) “…but the thing is you get this weird feeling in the pit of your stomach ..just a twinge??” (and she got that look of ..recognition and a happy…almost relieved look in her face) and she was all, “yeah! and it seems that there are times when it happens a lot and then a long time goes by and it never happens!” I am grateful for that experience.
9) if you have a spare gratitude item, something that a real person might submit, Hey! K2 (the other Kristi), Joy, Stephanie might come up with…. if you guys have any left over Items and you’re only gonna throw them away…I’ll be totally grateful! lol)
10) weekend! it’s work today, until about 5:30 and then at 8:00pm it will be the Wakefield Doctrine Saturday Night Drive, which is a call-in thing that we do at the Doctrine and DownSpring Cyndi usually call in…I have one of those conference call numbers (1-218-339-0422) where people can call in and enter the access number ( 512103 # ) and talk about the Doctrine. Tomorrow its the Wakefield Doctrine Video Brunch Lizzi and Michelle and Denise and Kristi once and Zoe for a few minutes one time and even Dyanne joined us one Sunday, it’s like getting together with friends over coffee on a quiet sunlit Sunday morning… and I’m there too!
that’s it for Saturday
About clarkscottroger
Yo clark, I am grateful for the weekend and the Doctrine too. Was just thinking about how Clark like a certain person at the local coffee shop here is!
Hey! I’m glad you Commented… do you feel like doing the video thing tonight? (Sunday morning your time…but tonight for the rest of us!)
let me know!
That weekend thing is so true – Friday nights and Saturdays are just different, no matter what you’re doing.
Lisa
yeah… there’s a whole different feel (and even that seems to vary from one stage of life to another).
Very grateful for the weekend! I need to get my chores done now though- no 7-year-olds here to do them for me :(
Kate
yeah! what the hell is the deal with that! there should be lie, a resource of 7 year olds to do chores and all…good for the character and such lol
I am truly so happy for the weekend, you and the Doctrine, too. Seriously, hope you get a bit of time off and have a wonderful weekend now, Clark!! :)
Janine
thank you… the weather is nearly comfortable today too! I need to get out of this office and out into the yard for some physical activity! Have a good weekend yourownselfs
What a delightful list this week! You had me smiling all the way thru, even in commiseration of the “re-write”( which I just detest doing, and most often bail out at that point), and especially for #8 – oh God yes! PS – I have a whole list of spare “thankfuls” that I maintain in my cellphone notes and you are free to beg, borrow, steal, or copy one anytime! :-) So often when I read what others have written for the week, I am going “me too, me too”! And my list grows! :-)
I used to work all weekend, and have a Monday off, so that would be my weekend – but it never felt the same as the Saturday-Sunday kind, even if I was working then :)
Katy
yeah, clearly there is a whole different vibe to Saturdays and Sundays that must be pretty damn ingrained in the culture, seeing how so many more people work Saturdays (and Sundays even) nowadays!
Any non-North American culture people out there care to give us an additional perspective?
Josie
I’m kinda thinking that the story (in Number 8) is a good test to see if a person is a clark or not…I believe that everyone has moments like the one being described (not recognizing the familiar) but only clarks think it’s….cool. lol
What time zone are you? I might be able to call in at the night-call every once in a while, since somehow I’m not capable to figure out the technicalities to join the Sunday brunch..
BTW: I had a situation this week that reminded me of the Doctrine personality test.. I was standing in line at a check-out, keeping the privace distance when some person just slipped in front of me. No way am waiting even longer at this inept check-out, so I politely mentioned to that person that I was in front of her.. Some people.. Still wondering if that was a clark (not noticing what’s going on around, being focussed on something else) or a die-hard scott, living the predator personality par excellance..
Stephanie
We’re in Eastern Standard Time… which means that it’s 6:47 pm right now… (lol… I don’t know, that just cracks me up)
the number is 1-218-339-0422 the pleasant woman then asks for the access code followed by the pound sing 512103# I open it at 8pm EST and we always run to 8:45 sometimes longer…
excellent opportunity! your supermarket line… a couple of ways to tell: a clark would have looked at you (when you called them on jumping the line) but what not challenge back, a scott would (‘best defense is a good offense)… if they were rogerian, then (if you watched closely) they would have been looking around at ‘who was involved’… just you or others that would make a difference to a roger… very cool situation thanks for sharing that we us!
so Clark, did you find the pics? I will resend if not. Tom Terrific used to be on Captain Kangaroo! I never understood the funnel hat though… eclectic piece of headwear… and Mr Green Jeans… did he own any other color jeans? Not a fashion statement I think…more a necessity…clark?
Zoe
no luck… if you can remember the email address I will double check and I will email you at the email I see on your Comment from my most direct email address… yes the Captain! yeah I’m getting kind of a clark vibe from Mr. Greenjeans… a little roger from the Captain (god knows the military bureaucracy is a totally natural environment for our rogerian brethren ) with Bunny Rabbit being the perennial scottian anarchist
Oooooooo I totally forgot about bunny rabbit. You have to watch out for those quiet ones!
… a mute scott !!
what a concept! what would a mute scott look like?!?! talk about koans!! damn… you might be on to something here, zoe
Don’t forget Mr. Moose and Magic Drawing Board….
Dyanne
magic drawing board!! damn I totally had forgotten that part of the show…
I don’t know, Clark, as a SAHM, I often feel like Saturday and Sunday are more of the same. Thought I do tend to make pancakes on the weekend.
Sarah
“...I do tend to make pancakes on the weekend.”
I rest my case! lol
I don’t remember 7 y/o me.
I like the ‘thankful for the bad things which AREN’T happening in my life’ bit. That’s cool.
And also, Melissa once joined the WDVB by accident, for a few seconds – remember?
Lizzi
Yes I do recall! one of out first Brunches…
yeah the 7 yo clark… man! he really wanted to do well, do right, be real.. didn’t know then that it wasn’t his fault!
I love, love, love the weekend. It most certainly has a different feel. If nothing else, my husband isn’t at work. I can stay up late without worrying about getting up so early in the morning. We can have real breakfasts. Love it.
I was cracking up when you started begging for thankful things from other people. I thought you did quite well (almost “normal” even) this week.
If you had to throw out your first list because even YOU couldn’t make sense of it, well, holy crap, I can’t begin to imagine it….
Weekends are for waking up at the SAME STUPID TIME I have to every morning to go to work, but being able to say, “Ahhh, I don’t have to get up yet, even if I can’t fall back asleep and might as well get up and start some laundry and maybe make some breakfast thing that there is no time for on a weekday before I have to go out and run errands and then take the daughter somewhere she needs to be and go back and pick her up and think about what to fix for dinner and….
Dyanne
…so it’s pretty much, like you kick back and chill?
lol
(yeah, it wasn’t pretty)
Yeah, normal day, but without preschoolers.
I cannot BEGIN to imagine that list….
I know that you’re going to get this as a Clark but part of me is so itchy about TToT. I adore it love it adore it but also sometimes feel like a braggy asshole about what I’m thankful for like “YAY look at me!” Which (as you know) is always tempting but also SO FUCKING UNcomfortable at times. Like my post today? I didn’t like that person. And it was me. And I wonder should I change it or just be thankful for what I’m thankful for! UGH!!
Kristi
(not surprisingly) I know what you mean, (fortunately) there are some phrases that reference this state (unfortunately, as you might infer from the previous) this is a descriptive understanding, not an informative/explantive understanding.
one phrase I use (to describe what I think you are referring to) is that after I ‘exert myself among other people (non-clarks especially) ‘my head swells up and my face falls’… but there is something that happens, a kind of backlash that is either explicit, ‘hey, you’re getting pretty big for your britches, aren’t you?’ or more insidiously ‘mental nausea’ which is just feeling bad as an aftermath from going out of your comfort zone (or rather, ‘my’ comfort zone).
Frankly I’m not sure where I come down on what the hell this is coming from…it’s really unpleasant and lol all I want is time to pass…so it will fade away…nothing direct that implies I need to do something …just ‘be another time’
that’s a clue, I think… one possibility is that it is simply our own (conscious or un-conscious/deliberate or non-deliberate) efforts to stay clarks… a way we have of keeping us in our place. It really sucks and is nearly the worst we, as clarks can feel… the worse is when we really, really get exuberant and then get a full ‘hey you know how you think you’re finally learning? how you’re pretty sure that you have overcome being such a creep? well, you haven’t…they’re laughing, just not when you’re around’
thats the worst. (but there is a tiny, fucked up, pretty damn clarklike bright side to this… we (clarks) all know what this is like…so, for me, the next time I find myself there… the voice that tells me why I deserve it won’t be so totally airtight-correct)… not much help…doesn’t get me out of that place…but it is a new thing and it changes what that experience is about.
ya knw?
Late to the party, but really enjoying this weekend’s posts!
I am not offended by your TToT writing/re-writing technique…not that it would matter if I was! ;-) But it works for you and staring at a blank page can be a bit overwhelming at times! So, yeah, I am a big fan of “do what works.” I will try to make little notes in my calendar throughout the week of things that happen so I will have something to get started with for my post. It keeps me looking through the week for thankful things.
One of these here Sunday mornings, I am going to make it to the video brunch!! It sounds like FUN! My husband will think it is completely weird, but I think he thinks a lot of things I do are weird. So, whatevs. I would love to hear the voices that go with the words I read!
Have a great week!
Joell
would love to have you join us… btw many of us have a spouse like that lol (but they are all, for the most part, good sports…they just don’t have the….er latitude that we have when it comes to finding ways to have fun that are a bit on the different side)
I’ll see if I can make it happen this weekend!
Great list Clark :) Though, I can’t lie, I would have loved to have had a list presented from the PoV of your 7 year old self… that would have been interesting, but I imagine it may be a bit hard for you to channel? Sucks you had to scrap everything, but that you weren’t completely disheartened by it and continued on with a substitute list.
I love my weekends, but with my job they aren’t as meaningful. I actually do a lot of my work on the weekends. I think most people prefer the Mon-Fri gigs. Sounds like something great came out of one of your jobs of a similar nature. I don’t even know what you schedule is now, except you seem to work Saturdays.
That sounds like a great experienced shared between you and that agent. Wonder what impact it left on her afterwards. Maybe soon she will be taking pictures are some fancy historical location sporting a pink Doctrine T!
I honestly thought I was going to be able to do the video brunch this past Sunday. I think I was up, but maybe it wasn’t for long? 8am (if that is when it is my time, It’s been a while since checking) is so damn early for me. I still haven’t even opened my webcam I bought months ago…
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