Month: August 2010 | the Wakefield Doctrine Month: August 2010 | the Wakefield Doctrine

We know why you are reluctant to Comment

Welacome to the aWakefielda Docttrina (dis is da tearey of die clark and da scotts and dem rogers der). This is the place you can really get something really useful from the internet experience. Really. My Doctrine, she gonna make you so a happy that you, you’re gonna wanna say, where she been all my life, eh? Its twue, its weally twue.*

Charismatic

When you  “get” this “Doctrine” you “will” finally understand why “everyone” acts like they “do”. What confused you about, these so-called “family members” and spouses (nyahh sp ow seses), all them who have been tormenting you while you try to understand what they want and give that to them. BUT! do they like WHAT you do for them? HUH? DO they? wait! wait! I can answer that question!! Call on me! Me!  The answer to your question is:
“No, no they do not”   (Thank you, thank you I studied so hard for this moment. I want to thank the Progenitor scott and the Progenitor roger and all the DownSprings, thank you! thank you! thank you!)

Welll… (as a leading scott would be heard to say, just before totally firing some poor college student who was only working at the timeshare resort for the summer, in the hopes of making some money for school). Little did they realise what they were getting themselves into… In fact, have I ever mentioned that I survived and even flourished in the totally insane, twisted-personality realm of timeshare sales? And that that was only because of my understanding of the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)? Well, I did! Remind me sometime to tell y’all about it. It’s about half interesting.)

Anyway, I think I getting back to writing about what the current thinking at the Wakefield Doctrine is, vis ‘a vis getting Readers to Comment and participate and generally get us all famous and shit. Quick background, we know people are visiting and reading the Doctrine and we know that some people come back and read on a fairly regular basis. We also know that (other than Progenitors and DownSprings) there has not been a lot of participation from these putative Readers. So, what gives?
One opinion, offered by Friend of the Doctrine Mel, is that Commenting on a blog like this is kinda intimidating. Intimidating!?! What the hell is that supposed to mean??!! Wft we ask real, real nice for people to write a Comment, we even offer to give them a frickin, free, frickin hat (for their damn frickin heads)! How intimidating is that? Hey!! I asked you a goddamn question! How-Intimidating-Is-That??!!!

So, maybe there is some possibility that people might feel that they are expected to answer in a way that might be judged. But we do not mean that. When I say, “there are no stupid questions, there are just your questions”, I mean that in a kind and supportive way. We have all been where you are, and we truly invite  a reasoned and constructive response to our Posts, do you think you can manage to muster** a little initiative and write something? If we were all rogers here, we would come right out and ask you to Comment in a way that would sound like you would be the one missing out, if you did not Comment. But then, we are not all rogers here. Are we?

While that might be the reason (for the lack of participation) I have recently come to the conclusion that we have simply failed in conveying the basic concept of the Wakefield Doctrine to you Readers. When I think about how we got to this point (of the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers) I realise that most of the time has been spent ‘in person’ with people and saying things like, ‘look at that person, watch how they react, they are such clarks or scotts or rogers’. Even more basic than that, the beginning of spreading the word involved people who knew the Progenitors directly, so it was so easy to say, ‘you know how roger always does that’, or ‘now watch how mad scott gets when I…’ It was very easy to convey the elements of this theory of clarks, scotts and rogers, the (future) Wakefield Doctrine.

It is just that, after the immediate circle of friends learned this thing of ours, they were telling people they knew about clarks, scotts and rogers. It became apparent (or at least seemed apparent) that people liked it and were inclined to share it with others and the Doctrine was simply enough to spread that way. And so the Wakefield Doctrine blog came into existence. But the gap, the ‘one wayedness’ of writing a blog is a difficult hurdle to overcome. Combined with what we might charitably call rudimentary writing skills, we need to find a way to communicate the fun, the positive benefits, the value of the Wakefield Doctrine in such a way, that after reading this, people will say, “Yeah I know what those people mean!”

As you see, we have the Raison-ettes writing and contributing in the hopes of providing as much of the sense of the Doctrine as is possible. Maybe the only answer is to take it on the road. Rent halls in large cities and train people directly to carry the message of the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers out to the world.
Sort of like Fight Club.***

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C61olIkvoks

*    Stolen from Blazing Saddles, one of the top three funniest movies of all time
**  A ‘muster’ is an assembling of military troops for inspection. This expression, dating from 1575, first referred to passing such a review successfully (Wiktionary)
*** But without the fighting****
**** And without being Brad Pitt*****
*****Hell, without being Edward Norton

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You have more to say, Ms AKH? or do you have Three (3) more things to say

Alright people…. listen up. We here at the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers) have been working our asses off to get you involved. It really gives an interesting view point that will help you understand everyone around you. Don’t you want to know why the hell your husband, wife, kids, friends, bosses… are acting the way they are? Well then you have to know “who” they are. Maybe you won’t get so pissed at them next time when they say or do something that you don’t like or agree with. So get with the program and check it out. You’ll be surprised by what you find. Hell, you’ll have your own frickin’ eureka moment.

“…you’re damn right I said that!!”

AKH-ette

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look no further! we have the answer you are searching for, provided of course, that the question you have is: How I can understand the behavior of others and better understand myself through a system comprised of only three personality types?

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers).

Please make yourself comfortable, feel free to browse through the Table of Contents (over there on the right) or just flip through these Posts. There is a lot of information to cover and not a lot of time. So in a nutshell, seedpod, or lunchbox the Wakefield Doctrine is:

a fun and useful way to understand yourself and other people, a “theory” of personality that is much, much more than all those other theories you read about. The Doctrine says, “hey, there are three personality types in the whole damn world”. You and the person next to you and the folks back home can be seen as being one of these 3 types. They are clarks, scotts and rogers. Figure out which the person is and you will know a whole bunch about them. Figure out which of the three you are and you will not only know a whole lot about yourself, but you will be able to change whatever things (about yourself) that you have been trying (unsuccessfully) to change.

Really.  It’s true.

Of course, there’s a lot more to it than that, but for that you have to read more of what we have to say. But to get you started we will say this, the Wakefield Doctrine is gender and culture neutral and if you find yourself saying, “Hey, Mr Wakefield, sometimes I’m one of those scotts and sometimes I feel like one of those roger people.” To you we say, “whats the matter with feeling like a clark?, huh?”  (oh yeah, clarks not do that “I feel like” shit, do they?)
Anyway, we would say, “Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine! You have all 3 personality types, of course, but you are mostly one of the three. Don’t worry about it.

Besides we like to think this Doctrine thing is a lot of fun. We might be talking about someone in the news and one of us will turn to the other and say, “Obama….what a roger!” or we might say to each other, “You know those Progressive Insurance commercials on TV? That Flo person, how much of a clark is she, huh?” So this is not just a website you go to and take a test and find out that your personality type is INTP/otter-with-malamute tendencies, hell no! We have fun because we see clarks and scotts and rogers out there in the world and they act just like the Wakefield Doctrine tells us they should act! And it’s getting like we don’t have to make any of this shit up anymore…the clarks and the scotts and the rogers prove that the theory is totally true. Try it your ownselfs!

Today I have copied a page out of the Table of Contents to show that the personality business is not all dry boring, reading stuff! Clearly we like to borrow stuff, here at the Doctrine. So it should not surprise anyone how we went an sort a used Jeff Foxworthy’s “you might be a redneck…” thing. But hey if it makes you laugh, then you will be learning the whole thing about which are clarks and which are scotts and which are rogers.

You immediately stop surfing the channels when you come upon a show that uses only black and white documentary photos and film…you might be a roger

You totally love Christmas lawn decorations and cannot imagine having too many lights… you might be a scott

You find a flier stuck under the windshield wiper of your car and you take the time to read it… you might be a clark.

You are asked a question and you start to answer with “in the beginning…”  you might be a clark.

You are addressed by the wrong name and you answer to it without correction… you might be a clark.

You are building model cars/ships/planes, you always put the extra parts  back in the box along with the re-folded instructions for future safekeeping…you might be a roger.

You think that Slacker was the greatest movie made in the 90s…you might be a clark

You think that Borat was one of the funniest movies of the year…you might be a scott

You think that the 107 episode,  Directors cut, 15 DVD un-abashed edition of the compilation (with Writers notes (including what he had for breakfast) and voice-over reading of the credits by someone who knew someone who was a re-enactor who actually got hurt at an event) of all Ken Burns films, PBS episodes and commercials that last longer than most readings of the Iliad is the greatest film of all time…you might be a roger

You have any inclination to wear hats for a fashion statement (for male rogers only) or a ‘fanny pack’ (either male or female rogers), or  any clothing designed specifically for riding a bicycle (branded or un-branded)…you might be a roger.

You happen to be at a golf tournament and feel that it is expected of the members of the gallery to yell anything (including but not limited to “get in the hole”)…you might be a scott.

You are contemplating a project of any sort; a new deck or a term paper, writing a resume or planting a garden and you:

…you look forward to making the list of things you need to buy/gather/acquire first more than anything else…you might be a clark

…you must know what your friends on the ’do it yourself’ shows have done, that is what you want…you might be a roger

…CONTEMPLATE? PLAN? I JUST FINISHED IT! FUCK YOU!! IT’S DONE NO THIS IS FINE THE WAY IT IS… you might be a scott

So, there you have it. You laugh…you join…pretty simple, isn’t it?

Music? of course we have music!*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFQgJCrDXaM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s24XdYrRaek

*we kinda borrow the music too

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I was standing by the window, on that cold and cloudy day

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine ( the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers) Official Site. Here you can learn a way to look at how people act and behave that will have you smiling in confident understanding. And if that were not enough, this ‘theory of personality’ is both fun and useful. You know those, “take this test to see if you have a Driver Personality”, or the “Are you a Plant, an Animal or Mineral Personality Type?” kinds of things that used to be in the back of every Sunday newspaper supplement, but nowadays are the things you see on everyone’s Facebook page?  Well this blog is kinda like that….but better, more fun and useful.

elephant and some kind of bird sittin in it

Why do we say that? ‘Cause with the Wakefield Doctrine* you can know what kind of personality everyone else has, not just what kind of personality you have. I mean really, all these “test yourself”, “know your inner vegetable”, wtf!! if you needed to understand yourself better, are you really going to let a total frickin stranger on a website on the damn internet tell you about yourself? What, are you crazy?** Of course you wouldn’t. But if you are a little bored and are one of those people who get a kick out of finding  fun things that you can take back to your friends in class or at work or at the dorm, then you might enjoy this Wakefield thing.

We call it a theory of personality, partly ’cause it sounds good and partly to help the google find us, but it is not a theory like say the Pythagorean theory or the theory of relativity or even the Kevin Bacon Theory. It’s more like the thing you and your best friend do, you know, when you are where there are a lot of people and you start to make up stories to go with the people passing you by on the street or maybe the people in the cliques in school, (the ones that are real assholes even though they don’t need to be)…it’s sort of like that. But the Wakefield Doctrine is fun because it ‘holds together, on it’s own’. Once you see one person of each type, the rest does it by itself. Like seeing Amish people. When you see one, you will not need to have someone tell you next time you see kids with those clothes on or the haircuts…it will not be necessary to figure it out, you’ll just know. It’s the same with clarks, scotts and rogers.

What makes this Wakefield thing so good, why everyone seems to like it a lot, is that it doesn’t just make sense about one thing about a person, (you know like their favorite color or type of job best suited to),  this Doctrine thing tells you a whole lot about the person you are looking at. And you know, it’s really not that hard to do! You just read about one type (rogers are the easiest to start with) and then you wait. And the person you are watching will do it all for you!  Really!
You don’t have to ask the other person any questions, they don’t have to tell you anything about themselves, you just pay attention to how they act around other people and their personality traits will jump right out at you! A scott will always act like a scott, no matter whether you ask them to or not. (Kind of would be better if you didn’t go up to them and say anything like, “hey this website says you are a scott! do something scottian!”) Actually, if you read what we have here in this blog, you would know a whole lot about what that person would do, if you did, in fact, go up and say something like that. The Wakefield Doctrine is a fun way to think about people that seems to let you see a lot of how that other person sees the world.

So, Wakefield Doctrine Lesson of the Day? No Lesson today! It’s Saturday! But there is only one more week before school starts, so there is a lot so stuff to do. So no time to waste.

Ms. AKH has been busy on her project! (She has her own little column, right in the middle of the first page… the one that says: “Hey!! scott talking here, pay attention”..she has been working real hard on it, so be sure to go there and read…
DS#1 is working on getting everything ready for the new school year (at Mill Fill High, of course!). Not just a few changes there this year, new Exchange Students! We have a group coming in from (the Autonomous Region of ) Madrid, and everyone is looking forward to welcoming them.
(the)roger (or RCoyne as he has been sometimes signing in as)(kinda like the RCoyne, decent thug vibe goin with that)(which, in context of Civil War Re-enactination makes for a very strange visual) at any rate, he has been busy with the recession session but is probably going to help with some of the re-decorating that is goin on since Miz Becca showed up.

So, if you are new to the Wakefield Doctrine, welcome! This thing is fun. And it is not really that hard. Once you do get it, you will be glad you did.

(and we have music…all sorts of music…category defying music…Mr. B?  resist any reasonable effort at categorization, if you would…)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5sVP4S4cJ8

*Doctrine: not associated with any sect, denomination, religion or any other scary bunch of people who seem all, like friendly and interesting at first but the next thing you know they are asking you to help them hand out little leaflette things at the bus station or the cafeteria…those people we…the Doctrine does have those kind of people, but they are clearly marked and easy to avoid.

** Actually it kind of makes you a clark, but that would come as no surprise to you, would it?……clark

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MS. AKH? you have the floor

“I’m thinking maybe we need to come up with some more “buzzwords” that are included when a person is directed to the Wakefield Doctrine website.

It (the blog) already contains  the Wakefield Doctrine, personality, clarkscottroger. Not that those aren’t good, but they are very specific to the site and make it harder for us to appear in more popular searches related to “behavior”,” theory”,” personality” But they should be words that appear frequently. For example, if you’re directed to the Wakefield Doctrine web site, it’s because of the words that describe it, i.e.

Theory, 3 personality types, 3 human behaviors.

Both the search words and the words in the description (“welcome to…..” ) need to appear in each.”

“Maybe if we added something to “the Wakefield Doctrinetheory of clarks…. ” For example, theory of 3 distinctive personalities and their behavior.

“Personality”, “personality type” and “behavior” are popular searches.

So if , in addition to, “Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of ….)”, we add something like “a fun place to understand the theory of 3 personality types and their behavior.”   Maybe experiment by adding those words to the description/introduction on the website. It can always be changed.”

“The words in bold would be what directs a person unknowingly to our website, among others, without looking specifically for it under “the Wakefield Doctrine.. They would be using search terms like “personality type”, “human behavior”, “personality”, “theory”

I don’t know. Just thinking.”

“…you’re damn right I said that”…

AKH-ette

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