Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)
(‘I have no idea…)
Today’s Guest Post Writer, Joy Christi is a self-admitted scott* who, interestingly enough, I first met at one of Lizzi and Michelle’s Friday Night vidchats. (…have you ever had the experience of being at a party or hanging out with some semi-friends and you’re getting kind of bored and you make a joke or say something just for the hell of it and you get total zero response….except for this one person (who is not even standing in the immediate circle of people you are in? like maybe you’re at a table and a girl(or guy) sitting at the bar laughs?)
Kinda like that with Joy. I mean, I knew her from the TToT, she writes the blog, ComfyTown Chronicles and no one coming across that blog doesn’t notice it. Funny about some scotts…. you think, ‘ok straightforward, confident and fun-to-watch predator’ but then they get all kinds of multi-creative on you….photos, cartoons, the whole shebang! and you’re like, “damn! this girl has some chops!” Joy does that at ‘Comfy. And then, her first appearance at the vidchat! … I didn’t know you could pull off a noir vidchat… but there was Joy, sitting in a semi-dark….someplace in her house, not saying much (not being overtly mysterioso, just being there) and then… (this is my favorite part), she’s like.. “hey, hold on, I gotta go outside for a smoke” !! (I hope this really happened and Joy wasn’t playing with us with some insane CGI thing because that is way cool). …how scottian is that? This, all on the basis of, maybe 3…5 max vidchats (and a bunch of ‘OTs). scotts do tend to make an impression….no?
(remember back in the day when sitcoms decided to insist on how funny they really were, so there was always this announcement at the start of the show, “…was filmed before a live audience”?…. here at the Doctrine we’re always trying to move forward in self-developing ourselfs, so the following: “…this introduction was written, knowing that our Guest Writer is a scott, entirely before even downloading (much less reading) our Guest Writers’ Post”)
…Joy?
Not A Great Scott
I was asked by Clark to guest post my Scottian point of view. I am totally honored and thrilled to do so, and extremely tempted to post something absolutely outrageous, ala pictures of my internal or external organs, though that was done fantastically, or mayhaps my Husband’s Pipe….but I did that Sunday on my own blog.
I was hoping Outrageous Inspiration would strike before the deadline because I haven’t been my usual…. Scott-ish self lately. Sure I bang out a knee-slapper of a post once a week, but I haven’t been the entertaining, witty Scott I used to be. Maybe I should wear a kilt and drink beer from a giant stein. That couldn’t possibly be a bad idea, no matter what happens.
After reading Clark’s description of the 3 personality types months ago, I quickly diagnosed myself a Scott. I’m a tomboy, I often leap before I look, I’m an extrovert to anyone casually watching. I usually introduce myself and am always talking, joking, generally being a jackass, usually in a non-threatening way. I’m guessing this based on people’s reactions to my asshattery.
I have learned to use humor as a defense mechanism in any situation, whether I’m feeling unsociable, or the chatter in the room has grown too serious for comfort, or in the case of the never-ending fighting all around me growing up. Tense situations were always easily diffused by The Jester, or Class Clown, or whatever my shrink at the time called that particular character when he explained about the different roles people play in alcoholic families. This usually works fantastically even outside of a family dynamic.
However, lately I haven’t felt that way. I’m curious to get Clark’s input on whether it’s a temporary issue, or some personality paradigm shift.
The reason I started blogging a year and a half ago was partly for adult interaction. I am alone with my children and other people’s children *shudder* for 11-12 hours a day. I love being right where I am, don’t get me wrong, but being the Sole Adult in a house full of small children and rebellious teenagers can quickly suck the funny out of a person.
Being the parent means changing from having all the fun, to the person constantly shutting it down because it’ll stain the carpet.
Or someone will get hurt.
Or your face could stay that way.
As if, I know. But you try to talk to a 4 year old who keeps crossing her eyes at you. It’s cReEpY.Before this work-at-home life, I had no issue meeting new people, making conversation, wooing clients, impressing middle management and the like. A friend of mine used to invite me to her client events for my ability to make (fake) small talk, anything and everything from weather to sports to politics, without getting too heavy or emotional. I was a Corny Joke factory. My old man had a million of ‘em.
“Oh, your foot fell asleep? Now it’ll be up all night.” And so on. Forever.
I did the same thing you’re doing now, rolling your eyes almost out of your head. If you hear these zingers enough times, they just come right out when the opportunity presents itself. Then the people you tell them to groan, but they find themselves telling them. And so on. It’s Personality Herpes. It sure beats awkward silence, though, I’ll tell you that.
Chit chat seemed to be second nature, it came easily and wasn’t anything I had to even think about. I opened my mouth and the right words and questions vomited right out.
Lately I’m not as chatty, I don’t find myself full of jokes. My husband will say the classics before I even think of them. And most embarrassing, I’m so afraid of having another awkward encounter I tend to over-think before speaking. I wind up avoiding having to speak to anyone but my children.
I’ve blogged about an awkward encounter with a neighbor who was having a His & Her Divorce Garage Sale, I was at a total loss for words. People who have known me a long time find that hard to believe, but there it was. 2 days ago, yet another awkward neighbor encounter. I’ll get into full story next week on my blog, it was getting way too long and it’s not very relevant to this post.
The moral of that story is, as most of my stories are lately:
A mildly awkward situation is made worse by inability to find and form words.Why does this keep happening to me?
Why is my brain downgrading?
I’m not watching reality television, or drinking excessively, okay not really excessively.
I read, I write…ish, I eat fish and vegetables, I take vitamins and fish oil, we lead a relatively healthy life. I don’t do drugs, I try to get a lot of sleep, I go outside, we play card games and do puzzles. What up with the what up?Mayhaps I am just lacking confidence, causing me to over-think.But wait, don’t Clarks think, and Scotts act?
Maybe a person’s secondary trait can become more dominant as they age.
Perhaps I was never really a Scott, I just played one on TV.
Mayhaps this is just the way things are going to be.Do I see a Clark-moon rising?
Is there a Roger in my 7th house?
Is it just a matter of interacting solely with children for the last 4+ years?
Meh, whatevs. Gotta go watch cartoons now, L8R G8Rs.
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Joy Christi writes Comfytown Chronicles, which is sometimes a blog about a mother of 3 just doing her best, but mostly is about silly humor, cussing, day-drinking, binge eating and other things she won’t go to meetings for.
…not the actual, specific exact photo sent in with post… so we (no! don’t laugh)…made it bigger to compensate
Blog: www.ComfytownChronicles.com
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComfyTownChroni
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ComfytownChronicles
Instagram: http://instagram.com/comfytownchronicles
* like, has anyone out there seen a scott who has been the least hesitant to claim their scottian worldview? …sure, it might take them a little while to ‘get it’…. they like to bat the prey around, stir it up, have some fun, but once they’re confident in their understanding of the Doctrine…. ain’t no hesitating.
About clarkscottroger
Trying very hard for frist, but crappy connection.
methinks I see a secondary clark :)
…came through for Frist
(yeah, getting that as well)
Yeah well I had to try TWICE
Lizzi you beat me on my own post! Typical :)
Yeah well GOOD cos I got frist on my own guest post, but after a few hours, when no-one else cared to read it, so…
Having had the privilege of meeting Joy in person….Joy, you definitely identified your scott correctly (charming, rioutously funny, outgoing…) i suspect your current angst is a screaming clark secondary ( I mean if clarks did that sorta thing). …still missin yer face btw…
Damn….how did the Thor link make it in there…my phone is so F*****!!!
Hey, Clark , did you get rid of THor? Now everyone just thinks Im F****** and its not my phone… but thanks !
damn… I thought you wanted it done…. (I see the link in your comment from the other day…) should I restore it?)
My goodness youre a sensitive little clark!!! No really!!! Thankyou!!!! Im too sarcastic sorry!!!
“The Secondary Screaming Clarks” would be an awesome name for a band!
Who was charming??? I miss YOUR beautiful, bespectacled face!
Remember “Men Without Hats”? Some friends with recent hysterectomy issues thought “Women Without Fallopes” was a great idea for a band… dunno…. but I do like “The Secondary Screaming Clarks”! Denise would have to pick out the music though… I cant seem to take all the screaming!
hahaha I used to love punk rock, but I think those days are fading as my Clark Moon rises.
I love the sound of “The Secondary Screaming Clarks” lol. Good one Joy!
Hey Zoe, I don’t love ALL screaming music but in this case……:).
CURSES I can’t even get a Frist when it’s MY post and I’m watching the computer. Ish.
Thanks for having me, and noir-flattering me, which is now a thing.
I accept your Secondary Clark,and shall try to be worthy of the name.
Good call on this picture, Clark, the other one is over 10 years old! I just like it because chicken hats are FUNNY.
Joy, you are a truly wonderful Scott! And I love that I’ve gotten to know you!
Thank you, Michelle! I’m honored to have met you as well! I hope I can start being a regular on the Friday vidchat again. Friday nights are the WORST for me, I’m so tired by then. I’m trying! Thanks for reading.
I do believe you have given Clark a week’s worth of posts with this one!
Hope you get your groove back before yet another awkward neighbor meeting.
Hopefully that’s a good thing. Thanks Christine. It’s getting harder and harder to avoid contact, especially with how CLOSE TOGETHER our houses all are! I can see 4 houses down into everyone’s backyards just stepping out my backdoor. There’s no avoiding it! Unless, like I’ve been doing lately, I park in the FRONT, which means my car is not using our garage, just so I can avoid eye contact. That sucks, but that’s life sometimes.
Pictures of external organs are still up for grabs, Joy. No pun intended.
I’m a very shy Scott until I get to know you. Don’t know what that translates into.
Because chicken hats are HILARIOUS!
… lol
I came THISCLOSE to a post I started about bewbies, but I didn’t have time to get photos or graphics made, and that was obviously going to be the BIGGEST feature of that post on the Doctrine! Maybe next time :)
I wonder quite a bit about the impact of secondary (and tertiary, too, I guess) traits, also. Maybe as we age, we’ve had more opportunity to experience the world from all three worldviews, and thus move more easily between them? I don’t know, just thinking aloud here.
That is a pretty darn good theory, Kristi! I was thinking that my Scott developed as a defense mechanism, more Environmental than Genetic, and as I have aged I don’t need the defense mechanism as much. I mean, I DO, but not to get through every single day as when I was younger. My focus has completely changed.
Time will tell if how it will change moving forward.
Oh ze scotts. :)
What a fun post! I will come back and comment more properly later on…
Thanks!
Joy
I had a Reply, thought to be clever and post it ‘out here’ from the audience (…who was that roger…one of the first daytime talk-show/audience riot guy…way before Maury or them others… total roger…someone help me out here!) (Update: Phil Donahue!!) (such a roger!)
…anyway, it apparently did not Post.
day late and a dollar short, as the saying goes, (at my own blog! lol)
there is a bit of conventional wisdom that appeared here pretty much early on, everyone participating in this blog, i.e. reading (more than one Post), Commenting (other than ‘stay the hell away’) and guest posting is either a clark or has a significant secondary clarklike aspect.
so that accounts for part of your question.
the ‘what happens as we get old’ that, actually, is a leading topic currently demanding attention…inside my head. (fortunately most Readers these days are sufficiently grounded in the Wakefield Doctrine to, at very least, begin to frame the question in a way that will produce some insight).
I think I did a Post… yeah, I’m sure I did ’cause zoe was laughing about the (unintended) frisson that resulted from my posing the challenge of ‘finding the polar opposites of the three worldviews’ ( yeah, I know, she would laugh at that)
in any event, the short answer is…which ever is the polar opposite worldview is the one having the biggest influence on us when we age or are under extreme duress it does not mean that we change our predominant worldview…. it’s more like…. the lion(ess) suddenly becomes enraptured by the beauty of nature
…I think Christine is experiencing something like this…check with her
and if this stays a topic of interest, I could always write a Post
Phil Donahue, yes. He is an extremely intelligent Roger, despite having opened Pandora’s box on the Maury awful television phase. I used to think Maury was intelligent as well, not sure what happened there. He DOES actually help people, but the show? Makes my soul vomit tears.
I can tell you that in the case of attraction, to mates/friends, etc., we tend to be attracted to people who have the traits we COVET more than the traits we have ourselves.
For example, a quiet, deep-thinker may be attracted to someone more extroverted, and a knuckle-head like myself is extremely attracted to my very intelligent, and much more quiet, husband. My sister married the same kind of quiet, calmer partner. Most people just shrug and say “Opposites attract” and that is true, but I think we also subconsciously seek a balance to ourselves and our lives. No?
I also like the theory that part of our personalities develop as a reaction to our environment, sometimes a “Defense” mechanism, to the surroundings, and that part may not have actually developed if we were raised in a different environment. So that true self, that may be genetic (?) is hiding down in us somewhere, and comes out more as we age and either leave the situation where that part developed, and/or age and become more CONFIDENT and thus, more able to be our TRUE SELVES, rather than just what happens when we react to situations, using whatever defense mechanism. Thoughts on that?
Thoughts on that?
I agree with what you are saying, the beauty part (as a friend used to say) about the Doctrine is that it does try to ‘one up’ any other personality system, it is an additional way to understand the world and the people around us… but in case anyone out there (no, not you, Joy…those other people) starts to think that the Wakefield Doctrine doesn’t have a position on the very real questions you are raising, I say… “nuh uh!! we do so!!”
The Doctrine is based on the idea that part of all of our existence’s (as individuals) is to a small but total important personal this is the worldview we talk about, my worldview is that of the Outsider, yours the Predator… fine, I won’t restate the whole Doctrine in this Reply. But along with this personal reality of three types we have the very critical principle of ‘everyone does everything, at one time or another’. and, coming back to your point about defense mechanisms and responses, the Doctrine will say ‘sure! makes sense…’cept a situation for clark may be experienced way differently than that same situation for a scott’ all this is meant to do is remind us, that everyone lives in a reality that we may or may not fully appreciate.
Makes my soul vomit tears. damn! I am, for the second time this weekend, envious of the gifts of wordation of others
Truth.
I am often envious of clever word turns. Lizzi is amazing with her fiction. She takes me RIGHT THERE, holding my breath and that underwater story? I almost fainted. My breathing changed.