clarkscottroger | the Wakefield Doctrine clarkscottroger | the Wakefield Doctrine

I’ve got news for you, thats not my thumb

April 21, 2010 By

What do you mean, ‘It’s Readers Day’, and why do I have to come up with a new Post?  It’s 7:45 am and I have to get out and get to work…sure I know the pattern of Reader Visits, afterall I am the damn creator…so what if there is no new content on Reader’s Day…(and stop calling it that!) .  It is simply a part of the pattern…people realize that there is not going to be a new Post each and every day so they check in once or twice a week.  Maybe they even wait to let new content build up, that’s what roger said he does about the Spatula…

So, you still have not explained why we need a totally new Post right now when there is zero Visits.  I think the Readers will show up and read what is Posted, the (current Post) “…and now a word from…” is a perfectly good Post, it’s got information…they have not seen it yet…it even has Comments, but has not ‘taken off’…(‘as if the Readers will actually make a Comment’, thank you Miss Sullivan that will be enough…).

Let’s compromise…let’s plug this in the front…alright and one video and run with the most recent Post…after all, new content is new content.

HEY! Readers!  No, the guy walking behind you as you sit in front of a computer with a url of wakefielddoctrine.com…of course I mean you…jeesus…I thought our demographic was a little more evolved that…don’t you dare hit that next page/last page!
What is your problem…write a damn Comment….no contest…no totally cute appeal from a imaginary high school junior attending Millard Fillmore High School…‘the fighting adolescents’…no tricky word play…just tell me what is the deal…you are reading this…how?  I am the fuckin creator of this thing…as in dashboard…as in you see that Visitor thing to the right…of course I know what days people show up…and who the hell is that keeps trying to write a Comment but is coming in from a pricebuster.com or some damn site…SPAM…the filters are calling you spam…we know the demo of our readers place you  in the upper percentiles of intelligence…let’s see some of that demonstrated…what? video?  screw that…23 visits by noon and maybe then you will see come cleverly selected music…alright as an alternate, show me one Comment from someone I don’t already know and we’ll see…

So scroll down and read the Post and write a damn Comment…don’t make me have to write in some other font color again…you wouldn’t like me in any other damn font color…
(if the Sloviansss had Popeye cartoons in the day then at this point, if you listened carefully he would be muttering…
“zakaj fuck moram jaz sitnost s to.  rabim doseleti se niz ter izdelovanje a spodoben življenje. vijak oliven Oyl ter zraven kaj za vraga milosten ugleden je to?  oliven Oyl. pustiti Bluto življati svoj. oni zaslužiti drug drugega. to po škotsko , pretiravanje sin od a zoprn.”)

What is that?  Miss Sullivan…a Wakefield Doctrine lesson?, sure make it quick…

“umm as you can see things are a little testy around here this morning (alright Jimmy enough of that) but I am in existence to allow for a quick change in narrative direction, so here goes…he really is kind of upset…mostly about the layout of the blog and the fact that he was out searching for other blogs for ideas and came across a bunch of blogs with ‘hit counts’ in the millions!  about pop music…not original content…no content at all to speak of..just millions of hits…he says he does not care but you know how reality-based constructs can be about that sort thing, they are all… “but I am real and this is a real thing that I do and those visitors are real people, why can’t they”…and I am all “whatever, I think you write the best blog in the world”…and then he quiets down.
But we promised that there would always be a lesson to each Post, so here goes today’s:

Not only are rogers the keepers of culture and history and maintenance of the ‘status quo’, they are the story tellers…in the past they would have been the minstrels, the keepers of the verbal history of us all…this is clearly seen in the Posts of the roger…totally limited in number, so much so that there is no real continuity of storyline, yet people enjoy reading his Posts, his stories…and it is in his ‘voice’…because it is the voice of the many, of the herd.  And the ‘proof ‘ of the Wakefield Doctrine lies in the fact that both clarks and scotts respond to this ‘voice’ and that is because we have our rogerian aspects within.  I am  a clark, but a part of me longs for the herd…

…there!  now can I go? I really must get to the bus stop, I promised Britney I would pick her up there before she had to ride to school with those ‘vo ed’ kids…’ta

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjHQoWRbMf8

 

 

 

 

 

Share
Filed Under: clarkscottroger, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: , ,

and now a word from our

April 18, 2010 By

 …have I mentioned that we will have Wakefield Doctrine t-shirts available this summer?

…yeah, we will probably start by giving them away in contests, (no chance of running out of stock taking that approach, lol… ) 
(…can I say something?…it’s getting real uncomfortable in here… )

…yeah, we figure if the hats (for your damn head) take off, the next logical item would be that old standby, ‘life-philosophy-short-enough-to-wear’ clothing item…  tee-shirts!…you know, maybe a contest to come up with things to print on Wakefield Doctrine t-shirts is not a bad idea…

…alright, a contest it is!…and then we have to get to a discussion of the points raised by our own resident roger (in the last Post)…
(…can’t you ever just relax and have some fun?…always with the Doctrine says this and the Doctrine proves that…if I were not ‘imaginary‘…)

Send in your suggestions for things to print on the Wakefield Doctrine t-shirts, the only requirement is that they must be Doctrine related, when we get a bunch, we will put them all in a Post and call for a vote!
So far we have: (from Glenn):

Really, Dude. Try not to be such a (roger, scott, clark)
I’m a scott—I Scream, Therefore I Am
I’m a roger—and you should try to be a better person
I’m a clark—You can TRY to follow my train of thought…

…my own suggestion:  I ♥ Janie Sullivan
(…how sweet, you are not so bad for a reality-based figure in a blog…wait ’til I tell Britney and Jimmy…they will be so ‘I wish I was you’… )

…since we always have to further the understanding of the Doctrine, let’s have a brief discussion of some of the points made in the last Post (CSR 101).
[ED Note: Glenn was late submitting his part of the Discussion below…there must have been some sudden movement, a bright shiny object or pershaps something soft and furry…(picture Glenn-shaped cloud at a computer slowly dissapating)…anyway his responses may be slightly out of sync but are still germane…scotts…what can ya do?]

(ROGER):   “…I’ll be referring to the last post’s mention of an affinity that exists between clarks and scotts…”
 (not ROGER):   …of course there is an affinity!  We all share the same potential! to quote the About Page:
Born with the potential to view the world in one of these three ways, all people possess the characteristics of all (three) but soon (by age 7 or so) ‘become one of the three.  Put another way: we all possess the potential to see the world as a clark or a scott or a roger.  It is only the predominance of qualities from one (over the other two) that makes us what we are.  No one is only clarklike or scottian or rogerian.
(GLENN):   Affinity is the wrong word. There are points of agreement– some compatible beliefs and perceptions–not affinity. And it is not so sinister as you have concluded. There are lots of times when clarks piss off scotts–and vice versa. Totally random. No shared agenda to put anyone down. But once a roger starts to believe something like this–it takes on life of its own. Panic sets in. Ever hear the term “Spooking the Horses”?

(ROGER):   “…I suppose that this affinity is pretty common discourse to clarks and scotts ( I have been calling it a symbiosis), but let me assure all of you; to rogers, it is quite occult.  We simply don’t see it.  Not to say we wouldn’t understand it, if illustrated.  We just don’t have a nature that would necessarily notice it.  I strongly suppose that this symbiosis is very much a second nature to clarks and scotts…”
(not ROGER):   There! there! that is a rogerian expression…he said occult…he knew the correct word but he went for the nearly correct word…damn how do they do that! Unfortunately for the herded ones, ‘symbiosis’ is not the correct term to use.  There is more commonality between clarks and rogers than there is between clarks and scotts. (This)  affinity is simply the result of the fact that clarks are not the prey of scotts, as are rogers.
(GLENN):   Hate to say this, but it is not a mystery. Rogers are simply not comfortable with anything that appears to leave them out. Without the herd, what is a roger? So, any agreement between two beings, that leaves a roger out–is suspect, possibly dangerous. Like any prey animal, they get irrationally fearful–their nostrils flare–they panic and act up–simply because they are not IN CONTROL.

(ROGER):   “…The affinity/ symbiosis is based on a shared disdain for rogers.  It is the common groundwork for all of their perceptions of rogers, and serves as the springboard to all their interactions with us.  They each have a…personal mythology that… define them as a clark or a scott…  you have your own too, and it leans you towards being more a roger than not…theirs tells them that they are vastly superior to rogers…they have it completely in common.  We… be the shared object of derision…”
(not ROGER):   fingers of one hand rubbing together…that’s the sound of me playing the world’s smallest violin…if there were not imaginary high school students in this blog right now, I might begin to get annoyed…disdain?… How about we define the term Projection: (In Psychoanalytic Theory…) the defense mechanism whereby we transfer or project our feelings about ourselves or one person onto another person.(DSM IV)
(GLENN):   Think of me as The Roger Whisperer. There..there..easy, boy. It’s just the normal way people link up and divide. It’s not clarks and scotts against the rogers. You only THINK you see a pattern. Its really more random..and natural–no danger..I’ll help you… His fight/flight response is off the charts. Poor thing. Here’s a sugar cube, boy..calm down..

(ROGER):   “…Well, #%*# that.  It’ not real.  While we’re busy singing ” We Are The World” and trying to figure out how to feed the planet, they’ve already got it solved.  If they kill you,then they eat well for a few days, and screw the planet.  Actually, to be specific; the clarks also have to eat, but don’t have the stomach for the kill.  So they find a way to get the scotts to do it for them. Symbiosis…”
(not ROGER):   Is that meant as an insult? rogers seem to have a certain…what is the word?…yes? Miss Sullivan?  (Disdain- D I S D A I N- Disdain) Thank you!  that is the correct answer and can you venture a guess why it is that rogers have such regard for clarks?  ( gee, I knew this one kid and she was like all different from everyone and the like cheerleaders would really make fun and stuff at lunch in the cafeteria…they thought that she was like stuck-up and weird and everything but if you got to know her you knew that she wasn’t really and I finally had to say something and then they tried to make fun of me…and you can imagine how well that worked for them lol…they stopped making fun pretty soon after I had a little private talk with the head cheerleader..lol can you say shallow?)
Thank you Miss Sullivan, I suspect that this topic is much more involved than anyone imagined…what? yes, it is good to discuss these things, the Doctrine does in fact maintain that we all start the same and even though we might experience the world differently, there is still the capability in each of us to identify with either of the other two…no, I do not think it would be appropriate to hold hands and sing…back to class! everyone! much, much more to learn and so very little time left!…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKn6h2x5IcY

..what’s that, Janie? your grandmother liked that song?…lol and your point Miss Sullivan? well, I supposed we could get a little more contemporary.  No, I really don’t believe we gain or lose readership as a result of the videos…

…what do you mean still too old?

Share
Filed Under: clarkscottroger, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: , ,

the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers

April 7, 2010 By

‘Hey, you got a minute?’

(Now is it all cultures that imbue this totally innocuous phrase with such bad ju ju?
Or is it only this culture?  Not really sure.)

You know by now that the Wakefield Doctrine is a unique and fun and productive way to understand why people act the way that they do, right? And, you know that the Wakefield Doctrine (aka the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)  offers you  tools with which you can change how you interact with the world, so much so, that the very course of your life can be altered?

Well, it does, and you can.

Just wanted to get that out there.  Sometimes it seems that we are writing the same thing over and over.  Pressure to come up with Posts that are funny or amusing, provocative or at very least, holding your attention through one more Post; all this in the never-ending effort to build the Readership of the blog.  To this end we have come up with a fairly odd array of themes and characters, (literary devices) and Polls and quizzes.  And vidoes, my god, if it were not for youtube.

I think that we have reached the halfway point of the beginning phase of this blog.  The actual Doctrine is understood by our Readers, and a style of presenting the information that supports the WD,  has evolved to a point where we are reasonably comfortable (sort of) writing these Posts.

So, why the weird vibe?

Well, to begin with, this is the 108th or 107th Post of this blog.
In the course of writing these things, we have tried to not only illustrate and demonstrate the principles that comprise the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers, but to do so in ways that Readers will find interesting, amusing and most importantly engaging.  I have the advantage in that I speak to most of the people involved in (this) process of writing Posts.  I speak of the group refered to as Progenitors and Downsprings, an odd collection of friends, relatives and others who have been drawn to this thing of ours.  Some are active in the blog on a daily basis and others are included on the basis of name only, but there is a group, as it seemed (in the beginning) to be necessary for this to be a totally collaborative effort.  Finally, there are the Readers, between 25 and 30 people in the world who come to the Doctrine on a regular basis.  I mention this because I am constantly looking for this blog to ‘take off’.  Sometimes I think, if only I could get the people I talk to, to ‘talk’ to everyone else, through Comments or Replies or even writing Posts,  then there would be the energy that I know is there but often think is not coming across to our Readers.

When I say that I talk to everyone, I mean everyone.  Real people, friends, work associates and people that I would otherwise have never have met, were it not for this blog, people like Mel and Jason, Pixie and Kino. (These are people I have met online, they are writers of blogs and citizens of virtual worlds.)
And the only reason I am talking to them and getting to know them as people, is the Wakefield Doctrine.

Given that the most frequent ‘voice’ you hear on these pages is that of a clark, can there be any doubt that the Doctrine is ‘a useful and productive (and fun) way to understand those around us’?
(And did I say changing our lives?  I did, didn’t I?  Can I get a big amen).

At times when I question what we are (trying to) do with this blog and whether or not it is coming across, the answer I am left with still comes out the same: the Doctrine has legs.
A major part of the process of writing a blog, (at least for me),  is trying to keep the ‘pride thing’ at bay.  I read the site visit stats  and everytime I see ‘good numbers’, I get all humble, like “yes we must continue to serve humanity and carry the message of the Doctrine to people in all the lands”.
And then there are the days when there are a grand total of three vists by noon and I am all ‘wtf? why do they forsake me, maybe I am overdoing the Janie thing, maybe they all are getting bored and what will I do with my life now’.
(Am being totally serious here, I mean last week or whenever the change over to the self-hosting occurred, there was a lag of a few days when the Wakefield Doctrinewas effectively offline.  I still can’t believe how bad I felt, lol.  As the oddly quaint expression has it, ‘I was beside myself’.  Damn it was un-comfortable.)
But then I will force myself to ignore all that and write a Post, even when, especially when, I totally do not feel like it.  And then I remember why I do this thing. 

And the preceding, little parenthetically top-heavy paragraph is the ‘proof’ of the Wakefield Doctrine.  If the Doctrine can permit/allow/encourge/enable me to do this thing, then it can do anything  to improve your own damn lives.

So, come on down folks!  This way to the Wakefield Doctrine carnival of understanding.  ‘Doesn’t matter who you are as long as you are here.’

Soon to appear in a computer near you: an Interview with a rogerian Reader (MJM), the second installment of Downspring#1’s Case Study, another Advice Column from Ms AKH and, of course, more from everyone’s favorite, Janie Sullivan and her friends at ‘ol MillFill High.  We will now conclude this Post in the (approximately) usual fashion, with videos. (I really can’t explain vid #1, I have never been a fan of the Dead but the goddamn thing has been in my head since I started writing this Post.  Worse than usual, I had only a fragment of a lyric, ‘this long…something’.  So I had to go through a ton of clips, did I mention that I am not such a big fan? “The Pain, OH the Pain” (Dr. J Smith LIS).  Oh! and hats (for your damn head) there will be so many contests.

…and then there is George…

Share
Filed Under: clarkscottroger, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: , , , , ,

a question is the hook of a demand F. Perls

March 30, 2010 By

As promised, kind of rushed, but here is the first set of questions that will form the basis of the clarkscottroger personal diet schedule (CSRPDS)(copyright pending).  This is just the beginning, a format will be developed as we go along but, as always, do not hesitate to Comment and/suggest additional questions.  We have Downspring Joanne to thank for the compilation of these questions.  (She has been elected Mistress of Testifying by the Progenitors and DownSprings; big round of applause!) (Readers take note, plenty of opportunity for advancement here at the Doctrine!)

You hear a knock on your door at home during the day. Without looking first, you open the door and see 2 Jehovah Witnesses/Mormen folks.
Do you:
a) slam the door shut
b) invite them and hope that they do not think you keep a sloppy house
c) invite them in and make fun of them as they give their presentation

You are driving during the day and see a car off the road, obviously in an accident.
Do you:
a) immediately pull over and see who is in the car
b) continue driving and plan to call 911 if you don’t see anyone else pull over(in your rearview mirror)
c) pull over and start directing traffic

You are in a busy supermarket check out line, six people in front of you and someone cuts in line.
Do you:
a) tell them in a loud voice to get in back of line and the others in line back you up
b) you start by pointing out to (another line member) what a jerk that person is and proceed to incite the crowd
c) complain until the culprit notices and then back off.

You’re in a convenience store and ask for 2 packs of cigarettes. The cashier brings only one and when you ask for the other pack,
she gets it while saying quite rudely “you only asked for one.”
Do you:
a) insist that you asked for 2 packs
b) say you’re sorry
c) ignore the comment.

You’re in a plane with a window seat and the passenger next to you hogs the arm rest, elbowing you in the process.
Do you:
a) elbow him back
b) say excuse me or
c) pretend not to notice while you squish yourself against the window.

You’re working in a store and a mother comes in with 2 unruly boys who are noisily running all over the place
and disrupting other customers while the mother completely ignores them.
Do you:
a) tell the mother to control her kids
b) kindly but sternly tell the kids to stop running around or
c) pretend not to notice the kids

OK, still way rough and general, but it is a start.  What you will see in coming weeks will be more questions, but we will be presenting them in a more ‘interactive’ manner.  Hopefully will get one of those apps that lets you (the Reader) take the test and get the answer/score right away.
The score?  Why whether you are a clark, scott or a roger, of course!  We know what you are pretty damn quick if you would write a Comment, but the idea is to help those more Doctrine challenged (yeah, I’m talking to you rogers) We know that the clarks simply cannot resist a test and the scotts will always sniff a bright shiny object, especially if it is simple enough and they (the scott) can get others to take the test. (yum, yum).

So, I will ask our Readers, take the damn test, already!  (Hat? always with the hats…)

OK …free hat (for your damn head) for the first 5 Readers* who complete the test (must submit your answers via the Comments).  Contest ends at the end of this week.  So hurry on down.

OH Sloviansss! I know you guys are reading the Doctrine…(it’s in the little visitor thing on the right).  We are serious about an Interview Post.  Not to worry about language, we can get one of those translators, if you are concerned about language gap.  I know that Janie keeps asking when you people are going to get in touch…we can arrange for her to do the Interview.

OK that’s a wrap for now.  A little video and out.

(Hey Ronin, Mel, Jason, did my new url make the transition on your blog rolls ok?  If not let me know and I will send it on over.)

(Hey, it’s got a dog, Jimi Hendix and attractive young people…what’s not to like?)

(*of course, you Downsprings and Progenitors are not eligible!  Besides you all have (or will have) hats for your damn heads)

Share
Filed Under: clarkscottroger, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: , , , , ,

say it soft and it’s almost like praying

March 28, 2010 By

(hey, be careful put that box over there…) (Did anyone see the box full of metaphors?…I don’t know I guess I would say it looked like…) (Janie…someone tell me that Janie was packed and the box clearly marked)…(No, I don’t think this blog is a spacious as the last…don’t ask me….)

Oh.  Hello.
Still in the move transition-state.  I trust you all got through the week,  it did get a little dicey for a while there, Doctrine in transition-wise so to speak.  If you checked-in at one point mid week, you would have found one of those beginner blog themes with a desperate plea to ‘come back, don’t get scared please come back’. (Save that, it will be worth something someday on the collectors market along with Howard the Duck action figures and Clifford Irving autographed copies of Me and Moe.

For those of you who did not get the Memo, the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers) has moved from a WordPress free blog to what is called a ‘self-hosted’ blog.  The free blog was very nice and gave us the platform to get the Doctrine out of our heads and into the world.  It was a user friendly and a simple to operate blog platform, and did I mention it was free?  But it had  limitations, mostly regarding the kinds of ‘programs’ that we could use on the site.  These limitations were not onerous and it was a low maintenance blog.  But eventually, the need for features and tools that could help the Doctrine grow outweighed the convenience of the free blog.

So here we are.  Self hosted (we pay to be online), but cost (should be) offset by being effectively unlimited in the kinds of things we can do with the site.  The list includes more useful polls and questionnaires, features and applications that can be utilized.  All of this will take time, so while we get comfortable in our new digs, we are trying to keep the ‘look and feel’ of the blog as close to the original as possible.  Clearly the layout is different, not too different, but not the same. (Did I mention it was different?).  At some point we will start to work on the look and utility of the blog, (hey maybe a contest! which theme is the prettiest).

(hey! hey!  watch the couch there, no that is clearly marked PLATES, so it does not belong here… it belongs there) (whats that noise? coming from one of the boxes!  damn I gots a feeling you-know-who is packed up in there, shit  lets hold off a minute before we un-pack our favorite high school student, yes?)

My apologies, I just re-read the last Post (I do enjoy reading them) and realized that I promised everyone that we would start of the Case Study series with this Post.
Damn.  Not gonna happen, unfortunately.  Too much moving in, figuring out what goes where, what the new buttons do (on the ‘Dashboard’ where I am writing this from), that sort of thing.
‘Fraid that unless Roger comes through with something today, we will be talking about the move and what to expect.  Promise to get to the new stuff as soon as possible.
On that note, a shout-out to MJ, who wrote asking where the Doctrine was. I re-stated my offer to help her write a Post (she is such a roger), and maybe if we all give her a hand, let’s git her up on the stage…(slow applause)…’come on up’…grace us with some rogerian words of comfort, learning and intrigue’…

While we wait for her to make up her mind…I see Slovenia in the HOUSE!!!  Sloveniiaaannnnnnssss!
Hey, guys good to see you made the transition.  You know what I would totally love?  A Post that includes an Interview with a Slovenian.  Seriously, that would be a good thing. You can have a choice of who poses the questions, etc (look at old Posts see what we have done with Interviews.)
But, I really would like to see that.

So, got to unpack.   (Hey who packed ‘the Janitor’?  in what box?…Labeled ‘BAGGAGE FROM THE PAST’  very funny!  lets see, pull this tab, cut this tape.…)

Yes!  Mr. B  would you be so kind as to…I know it was a little confined…no, packing characters together in a box would not be…appropriate.
…Would you be so kind as to find us a video to get out of this short little Post?  Yes upbeat and old would be a good combo, will leave the choice in your capable hands.

 

So watch for changes and fun and a Questionnaire and the start of the Case Study (featuring Downspring#1) and of course much, much more from those madcap little scotts that we like to call Ms. AKH and Glenn.

 

Share
Filed Under: clarkscottroger, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: , , , , ,
« Older Posts