Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

Weather-centric reprint today, from February 2013.

…as in, nine years ago.

Don’t tell anyone, but when I go way back in the records looking for a reprint, there is, sometimes, a moment of suspense, usually when I open a post that is the result of the younger writer being in a mood experimentale.* Yet there has not been a moment that I have felt self-conscious about what I’ve written. And, for a clark** this is huge. Self-consciousness is nothing less than the air we breathe.

So, without further skidoo, a post with a way-long, fairly-amusing title:

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the craziness of clarks, the really stupidness of scotts and the astonishing dumbness of rogers)

My pre-dominantely clarklike worldview has me writing this Post, apologizing in advance for it and…. still hitting ‘Publish’.

 

The North American culture is officially designated, ‘predominately rogerian‘ on the basis of the activity surrounding the upcoming WEATHER EMERGENCY, aka ‘a pretty decent snowstorm’. I suppose I should qualify the rest of this mercifully short Post, with a statement to the effect that it is not being written for the benefit of any of our rogerian Readers.
However, I would be shirking my duties as, Articulator-in-Chief, if I did not remind everyone that the second most important principle of the Wakefield Doctrine (the 1st being that our ‘worldviews’ do, in fact, constitute reality, albeit, personal reality), is that while we all live in a pre-dominant worldview, we retain the qualities of the ‘other two’ personality types. (And) these manifest to varying degrees in how we perceive and react to events in our daily lives.

In any event, we are witnessing the rogerian worldview, as reflected in the news/weather/warning information-yelling of the Media that is/are an integral part of our culture (as it is in all cultures). This is one of the few times when ‘age’ offers a legitimate advantage¹. The reason for this statement is that the older the individual, the more the contrast in ‘cultural-standards-over-time stands out. Just as cars were bigger and a whole lot un-safer in the 1950’s, the Role/Responsiblity of the State in protecting the lives and health of the members (of the State), has grown from  hardly noticeable to the current state in which snow storms have names. (yeah, just like Hurricanes!).  I used to laugh at the titles of the cheesy movies on the SciFi Channel, like ‘Anacondasaur’  or ‘Piranhasaurus Rex’ until this last Autumn.  Then we had our first official SuperStorm.  ( The plot development of the semi-hit movie, ‘The Day After Tomorrow’ spent a lot of time showing  satellite photos of the three giant storms that were about to totally fuck up the northern hemisphere… apparently this movie is now required viewing by our friends at the National Weather Service… I mean, how could anyone deny that Sandy was so a SuperStorm. Did you see how far those clouds reached?)

I apologise for indulging in my clarklike aspect (‘outrage’²) and will simply say, ‘Hey rogers! I get it. You are not really worried or concerned about health and safety. You just enjoy having a sense of the herd. Like being at a party, the person you are standing across from is not why you will say the party ‘sucked’ or ‘was awesome’, it will be how many people were there.
I get it. At least, I should, the Wakefield Doctrine tells us everything we need to know about how people act and react. For that matter, the Wakefield Doctrine rightly states that you will ‘not only know why a person acts the way that they do, but you will know how they will act in situations that have not yet occurred‘.

Thank you for your readation.³

(I promise to get back to Eve tomorrow…. yeah, scott  I get it!)

 

1) In no way to be confused or conflated with the totally indulgent belief that ‘this younger generation doesn’t know how to: dance/play music/make movies/have sex/make love/take drugs/study for the Big Exam/live a Decent Life/get the most out of Life/not screw things up so much

2)  We clarks see things happen that don’t make sense and when we cannot get a reasonable explanation we get upset….worse, when we see other people seemingly not notice this ‘unreasonable thing’ then we let ourselfs  get all  ‘outraged’ and such. We should not.

3) the photo is kind of indulgent?  well duh!  what part of the tome of this Post did you not get! lol

* no, not a ‘real’ French expression or idiom or even picaresque oberservation… but you really should have your in-head voice pronounce it: ‘moo deh x pera men tahl‘. It’s a lot more fun

** sorry, there are over twenty-seven million words written on the subject, go search the archives, if’n you’re wondering. Better yet, ask your question in the comments.