Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)
‘Friday evening walk’
Hey! Lets all welcome Kristi as the new hostinae and cat-wrangler here at the Ten Things of Thankful (aka the TToT)
(Wait a minute!…. join us in the Key of Me… I am thankful for:)
1) All the time and the effort that Josie Two-Shoes put into keeping this ‘hop up and running for the last year or two.
2) Kristi for being willing to take the helm.
Two right outta the gate. We on a roll, lets it going.
3) Friend of the Doctrine, Alex. He was in Greece recently and, (as is abundantly clear in the photo), vigorously invoking the Right of Hat*:
Well, according the ‘Right of Hat’ we should all get used to call it ‘Alex’s Parthenon’
4) Plant life and it’s qualities and characteristics that lend a certain amenability to being used to express the admittedly odd impulses of clarks, in this case, in matters of landscaping. The corn spiral is a perfect illustration of the indomitable spirit of Zea Mays. The reason for the spiral’s relatively slow start is found in my confusing ‘distance from the next plant’ with ‘distance from the surface of the earth’. Seems when Phyllis said, ’24 inches apart’, I heard, ‘Dig a hole 2 feet deep into the earth and cast the seed down’. Well, it’s looking like they’re breaking out into the air. (“Yes, as a matter of fact, I’ve had people listen to my Tale of Gardening and make the entirely reasonable leap to ‘Jack and the Beanstalk’. So is that a reflection on them…or me?”)
5) ….and speaking of plants! Given that the spiral is kinda working out, (corn spiral motto: “It’s like a corn maze, ‘cept you can’t lost or get lost!“), we’ve decided to plant some Driveway Corn. (A fairly small number of corn things have been planted along the driveway.) I suspect the neighbors will be delighted!
6) I am thankful for: …snail mail (in general) and ‘junk mail’ (in particular) because, if I’m in the mood, I can actually open it. This opposed to some predatory emails that will reach out from the (figuratively)opened envelope and drag me, Una, Phyllis, the title to my car, all of my clothes, most of my business clients and the loafers that I really like into the computer …and then pull the computer in on itself leaving nothing behind.
Example: Harmless, semi-friendly, snail spam**, replete with a free refrigerator magnet!
‘With a professional discount!’ (Note the genuinely useful refrigerator magnet with measurement equivalence, outlined in the shape of the appropriate utensil)
7) something, something
8) THIS SPACE AVAILABLE (Inquire within …because, as Edgar*** surely reminds us all, ‘...the answer must come from within.’)
9) Sunday Supplement
(as promised, photos of corn-ettes)
‘Breaking free from it hideously dark prison down into which it was cast, the humble corn seeds transform.’
10) Secret Rule 1.3 (From the Book of Secret Rules (aka the Secret Book of Rules)
* The Right of Hat is the fundamental right of all lifeforms to claim as their own whatever they decide should be theirs, provided they have an Official Wakefield Doctrine hat (‘...on their damn heads‘). Think I’m making this up? Follow this link to a post that makes plain how the Treaty of Tordesillas and the Wakefield Doctrine lets a body get away
** yeah, eww!
*** Edgar Winter ‘Free Ride’
About clarkscottroger
Photo of the corn? Would love to see it!
That has to be the most positive view on junk mail I’ve read. You do have a valid point. (And a cute refrigerator magnet, to boot!)
Coming along. The Driveway corn is starting to show… photos on next week’s TToT!
Excellent post!
Yay! for Alex’s Parthenon. Been awhile since anyone’s laid claim by Rite of Hat to structure, landmark, country or otherwise !
Congrats on the mega corn. Coming 2 damn feet outta the ground, they may just present themselves as supersized, super corn. Look forward to pics of the driveway corn :)
Welcome Kristi, and thank you!
I like the TToT it is the perfect forum to speak of Una’s perfect world that you have created.
I see it! I see it! May the corn continue to grow :D
Yeah, and where’s the Sunday supplement. And, I swear, Clark, you gotta open a Wakefield Doctrine store. I mean I would *so* order a hat, another t-shirt, maybe a backpack…lol
As for landscaping, well…I’ve started a little project in my spare moments. Who me? A project. Pff. Yeah, okay. Stop rolling your eyes. We have old bricks that were part of a demolished building from years ago. They have chunks of cement on them still, so John and I have been chunking it off different bricks so that eventually we can make a walkway in our yard. It’s a good, zen-like activity, you know? Finished printing the portfolio today. Working a bit late…but hope y’all had a good weekend!
Who sang it first, the Spinners or the Four Seasons? I love gardening or like Phyllis, watching my husband plant beautiful things in the yard. You dug a hole two feet deep (24″ apart)? I’m not really good with the math part of gardening but Tim uses a long and wide drill bit, sort of like an auger on the end of his cordless drill to dig the holes for planting. Pretty inventive, I think, and saves much time.
damn! excellent idea!
yeah two feet deep… they are finally climbing out like Uma Thurman in Kill Bill
Good get…. the Four Seasons! Wrote it and recoded it in 1966 (wikipedia)
Maybe Una can weave in and out of the driveway corn, like in an agility trial. LOL
Ah, those numbers can make a difference, two feet wide vs two feet deep. I once planted a plant that supposedly was a ground cover. Indeed some varieties are, but the one I got apparently was incorrectly identified, or I picked up the wrong plant. It is taller than me now.
Some of that junk snail mail requires scissors to get into it, especially if it is embedded in heavy plastic!
Una is looking a little leery of what is ahead, according to the positioning of her ears. Either that or she is impatient with the traffic. :-)
lol she’s doing that with the corn spiral in the backyard, but they’re not tall enough for her to realize that points are lost for running over them.