(Before we begin, a word about….nah never mind. You wouldn’t understand. Forget I said anything.)
But no, let me say this, I want to get a scott to say something about scotts. Here at the Doctrine we are in a developmental phase (soon to be announced watch this space!). Anyway, one of the challenges here at the Wakefield Doctrine is that it is axiomatic that clarks are different from scotts and rogers. And while I am an expert at the Doctrine, I will tend to write as a clark, which means that I am not speaking to the scotts or the rogers in their respective languages. We will solve this problem soon, but right now I have to get a Post out because it is, as the subtitle plainly says, Sunday.
So Glenn, you are reading this on a daily basis. Get the concierge to let you sign on and make a Comment. A long Comment. I will incorporate it into this Post. Just write the words, I will handle everything else.
Ms. AKH, the same thing. You are both scotts so give us some insight into the scottian nature. As you both can see, I have divided what was to have been the Post into Themes A and B and C. Use them as you see fit, address them or reference them, not caring. I am the Producer, here are your sets, props, tools call them what you will.
Theme A
Let’s talk about scotts! That’s! right!…scotts. The scottian element. The here and now only action speaks louder than…what was the question? I act therefore I am. The id and only “give me a primal“, “give me a drive.”..what’s that spell? Who the fuck cares…scotts don’t need no steenkin spellin…Even though this entire Post is on the subject of scotts, we do not have to do the dry…boring…how many words can we use to describe…clarklike approach. And scotts are not dumb…(they may be stupid at times) but they are not dumb, rather quite intelligent in a quick witted, problem-solving, shortest-path, not particularly creative way. Smart as a whip is often how they are described.
(You know how we loves our videos here at the Doctrine; not just for entertainment but for education, illustration, demonstration and elucidation….purposes. Our discussion of the scottian nature is especially suited to illustration (by behavior as shown in said video.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3lEqVAroX4
Theme B
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUd3sX9mn9U
It helps if you are a music fan in general and a (guitar) music fan in particular, but as this video shows us the scottian nature as it is totally focused on producing a (specific) reaction in the audience it is playing to…(this can be a literal audience as with Joe here or it can be a more figurative audience say the people at a party in front of whom the scott is telling ‘just over the line offensive’ jokes or is simply being an astonishingly provocative personality. And since I just used the word, I think provocative is probably the most appropriate adverb(adjective?) who the f*&k knows they want to get a reaction from their environment. I was about to say, ‘their immediate environment’ but that would be un-necessary. The immediate is the only thing for scotts.Another (musical) example of the scottian personality as seen in an entertainer.
Theme C
For that matter, let me state the obvious: this Post is not being written by a scott…(although efforts are being made to bring in a scott on this) so while the information that we are presenting on the nature of scotts is totally correct, the scottian Reader has long since wandered off in search for something more satisfying to chase.
So, why are we still typing? Because this is the Wakefield Doctrine (aka the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers) it is not the
So there you have it. A (scottian) do-it-yourself Post. Pick a Theme and write a Comment, your Producer will turn it into a Post. Hats? did someone say hats? If you say hats, then I say….. CONTEST!!
Here is the Contest: Reader(s) to take one of the Themes and write a Comment (of suitable length, say 250 words) from a scottian perspective. Do this thing and you will win a hat for your damn head* Come one, take a chance write words what harm can it do, not like anyone is gonna read the fuckin thing. Pixie, oh Pixieblonde you are our scottian ava of choice, come on down win a hat and I will throw in the first tee shirts as soon as they are delievered. (choice: I (heart) Janie Sullivan or (arrow to the right on front) saying: I’m with him (he is such a roger)
* Glenn and Ms. AKH not eligible.
About clarkscottroger
I did wander off… but I’m back. Joe Walsh I can understand. But Maria Muldaur? Are you fucking kidding me? She would definitely make me wander, no make that run, away. Maybe for that herd of camels (think about it) she is spellbinding. But count me out. As far as I’m concerned, there is absolutely no captivation or thrill of anything there. For Christ‘s sake “…the cactus is our friend…”. I mean come on. Really?
Joe Walsh, on the other hand, is a true scott. For starters check out how bright his shirt (like you didn‘t already notice). No blending in there. And how self-important of him to dedicate a song to those “not worthy” of already having one dedicated to them. How scottian of him to endear himself to others and thus establish who’s in charge. And of course we can’t forget that being the front man in a band is truly the nature of the scott. All scotts need to express themselves as leaders, as the person in charge. The energy Joe puts out there is his “front man” way to establish who’s leading the show. Maria Muldaur’s energy, or lack thereof, (and that voice, holy shit. makes my ears ring) does not exude “life of the party” to me. Which makes her a particularly boring “front person” if she can truly be called that. Doesn’t seem to have enough to engage unless of course you are one of those herd people who are easy to lead anywhere by any means. What a shame. Oh and thanks for putting that fuckin song in my head. Can’t get rid of it.
Rock on fellow scottians.
2010/03/24 at 2:40pm
Scotts do! That’s all there is to it, man.
Joe Walsh didn’t THINK about how to hop around on that stage. He just DID IT. He TOOK you someplace–and you went along—because he TOOK you. He mugged. He pranced. He jumped. He minced. But he didn’t care if you went along or not. He was happy going all by himself. (And he figured(correctly) that you WOULD want to come along.) He also didn’t care how anyone else FELT about it. His primal feelings were just out there. He was not interested in yours. Not in a hostile way. He just knows his feelings are more compelling. So he put them out there–without reservation. Without calculation. There was no thought involved. No plan. No strategy. Just pure energy and revelation. “HEY motherfuckers!This is ME! Fuckin’ fun ain’t it?” And it was. Of course. The other guitar guy with him? Probably a clark. Very creative. Talented. Invisible. He was swallowed whole by Walsh’s aura. How many thousands of people were there? EVERY one of them riveted on Joe Walsh. Every face turned his way. He is obviously talented and able to play guitar very well. But lots of mokes can do that. Walsh also played the audience. THAT is what makes him special. Like a virtuoso–a master. Never even a nano-second of doubt. “Playing this audience is my fucking job, man. I do it every day. Of course I’ll have them eating out of my hands. That’s what I do.” Thats how scotts go about their business all the time. This is who I am. This is what I do. Ain’t it a fuckin’ gas? Ain’t I a gas? I even fascinate myself. Not ego. Not brag. Just fact. And because I fascinate myself–I know I also fascinate you. Scotts live in a wonderful world. Population: One performer and an audience of millions. Scotts don’t TRY to get your attention. They know they already have it. They TAKE it. And you give it willingly. You NEED to give it. So you too can go where they take you. No other way to go there–and you need to go there. The Ogalala Souix used to have a word for their spiritual way of being in the world. It roughly translates as “Walk the earth as if you own it”. Scotts do this all the time. It gives them …electricity..energy..vibrancy. Just try to not pay attention.
The above was written by me. Not fucking Clarkie.
Would someone please tell us why that is?
What? Sure the question is why would it look like it was written by clarkscottroger but the authorship is with Glenn.
Follow up question?
Sure cause he’s too fuckin stupid to…lol
(“…me got stick work good to fight not need other things new things bad”)
stick look good up clark ass. not need new bad thing. stick work good. fit clark ass just right. me like stick. work good.
LOL
“There, there; there there