Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine ( the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers ).
It is not that clarks have anything against sports and/or sports extravaganzas, ’cause we don’t. But….
The thing of it is, being the perennial outsiders, clarks have a little more insulation from the influences of those who would gather everyone into a big, excited, pulsating with anticipation, murmuring in hush but deafening tones, vibrating with the excitement anticipated, yearning to see the OMG-did-you-see-the-Staples-Commercial?
Each year we see the growing orchestration of our culture’s candidate for the Bread-and-Circus Hall of Fame Award. And each year, I find it more difficult to ignore the people who proclaim that, ‘I haven’t been following either team during the regular season, I really will be watching for the Commercials’. (let me stop to allow for an overly dramatic emphasis…picture shaking ones’ head back and forth at a speed that blurs the features…cartoon-like).
…yes, I swear that I have heard real people make that statement, that they will sit in front of their wide screen HiDef TV’s and wait for the Commercials to come on…
But I said at the beginning of this Post, ‘Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine ( the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers ) and I meant it! damn it!
And as everyone reading this knows, the Doctrine is a way of looking at the behavior of the people in our lives and, by inferring the nature of the world that this other person is experiencing ( the cold and lonely world of a clark or the predatory, exciting and messy-yet un-imaginative reality of the scott or the ‘gather in a herd’, because you are the center-of-the-universe-warm world of the rogers) and understand why this person acts the way that they do.
With the Wakefield Doctrine as our tool we will be able to understand ourselves better and as for the other person, hell, you will know what they will do,before they do!












