scott-roger-ds#1-akh-glenn-joanne-phyllis-mel-jason-ronin-mj-kino-pixie-cy-doug

December 24, 2010 By 10 Comments

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers) for our second frickin Christmas!

Damn…  a whole year!
Those of you who have been with us over the last 12 months, no doubt feel the same sense of astonished appreciation that seems to come with every Doctrine Post at this time of year. And since the Christmas Season, in this culture at any rate,  conveys a certain license to those of us not gifted with the ability to clearly convey emotions, let me at least try to say how much we have enjoyed the benefit of the people associated with this here blog here.
It is not so much what the people here at the Wakefield Doctrine have done over the past year, rather it is how much they have taken this thing to be theirs and (conversely) given of themselves to it;  all  in ways while not spectacular nor dramatic or grand, are somehow more impressive. I am most grateful for what appears, from my clarklike perspective, to be the natural assumption of being a part of that all the DownSprings and Progenitors and Friends of the Doctrine show in what they have written and said and contributed to the Wakfield Doctrine. More a job for the roger to express, I am nonetheless moved. And I will say simply,  that I feel that no matter what we do in the coming year, my life is immeasurably better for having met and been a part of this blog with all the people involved.

So, quick out. Did somebody say, ‘re-gifting’? Here is part of what we did last year:

Angola…Feliz Natal e (feriados felizes do específico da cultura)!
Australia..Merry Christmas and Happy (culture specific) Holidays!…on the barbe
Belgium…Vrolijke Kerstmis en Gelukkig (kweek specifiek) Vakanties!
Bosnia and Herzegovenia… Čestit Božić i Srećna (specifična kultura) praznici! (I hope!)
Brazil….Feliz Natal e (feriados felizes do específico da cultura)!
Canada…Merry Christmas and Happy (culture specific) Holidays!…eh?
China…愉快的聖誕節和幸福（文化細節）假期！
Columbia…¡Feliz Navidad y Feliz (cultiva específico) Feriados!
France…Joyeux Noël et Heureux (cultiver spécifique) les Vacances !
Germany…Fröhlich Weihnachts und Glücklich (kultivieren spezifisch) Feiertage!
Ghana…Merry Christmas and Happy (culture specific) Holidays!…(!click!)
Greece…Καλά Χριστούγεννα και ευτυχισμένο (πολιτισμός συγκεκριμένες) διακοπές!
Ireland…Merry Christmas and Happy (culture specific) Holidays!…go bragh
Israel…חג מולד שמח ושמח (תרבות ספציפי) חופשה
Italy…Buon Natale e Felice (la cultura specifica) le Vacanze!
Philipines…Merry Christmas and Happy (culture specific) Holidays!…(send translation-o)
Slovenia…vesel Božič ter vesel ( kultura poseben ) dopust
Spain…¡Feliz Navidad y Feliz (cultiva específico) las Vacaciones!
Sweden…Munter Jul och lycklig (odla specifik) Helgdagar!
United Arab Emirates…عيد الميلاد قد وسعيد (ثقافة معينة (العطلة?! (dude!)
United Kingdom…Merry Christmas and Happy (culture specific) Holidays! pip! pip!
United States…Merry Christmas and Happy (culture specific) Holidays! y’all!

By Right of Re-Gift, I will use the Don McLean tune ‘American Pie’ (which is odd, as the first time around, could not stand the guy.)

YouTube Preview Image

Hey! Somebody go get glenn! He missed a present, musta been behind the couch or something. lol

YouTube Preview Image

Wait! Wait!!  Here is a vid that the mutated (among us) will get a kick out of…

YouTube Preview Image
Filed Under: Featured, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: , , , , , ,

hey, hey we’re the Monkees, We may be comin to your Town

December 12, 2010 By 5 Comments

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and roger)   

...clark...scott...roger

You don’t mind if we kinda just set aside the formality a little, do you?
Thanks. Ahh…feels good to type in comic sans after 12 months of Times New Roman, hold on…. hey  HEY!!! yeah!….ECHO…echo…echo… lol   

Sorry, always wanted to do that. Today’s Post will be our Christmas letter from those of us here to all of you out there. Been a big year not only for the Doctrine, but for a lot of the Progenitors and DownSprings. Had a lot of fun and aggravation and those things that must happen to all family/hobby groups of people that find themselves drawn together by a common interest.
Speaking of common interests, I have a confession to make. While I write this Post I am also trying to channel my inner roger. I know, I know I should ‘be myself’  and ‘write what I enjoy’ but in the last few Posts the topic of communicating and writing style has surfaced and re-surfaced and no matter what I know is the right thing to do, I still am trying to write in a way that is not,  “self-referential” obscure and arcane.  (damn! did I or did I not just get self-referential with my attempt to not be self-referential?) Fuck it.   

So it has been a busy Year around the Doctrine. DownSprings and Progenitors alike have found areas where they could develop new interests, express themselves in new and more creative ways.
Ms. AKH seems to have found her calling in the critical role of Pusher of the Doctrine; we have been without a geek for a number of months and the need to take the Doctrine to a wider audience has never diminished. AKH took it on herself to try and learn what we can do to get this thing in front of as many people as possible. That means a whole bunch of little things that do not necessarily show, links into and around and through the nexus-portico-server-thingie. Anyway, her efforts have been paying off! We have seen visitors from new parts of the world every day. One of the bigger (and sometimes aggravating things) she has done is convince me to write at a place called Hub Pages. It’s kind of a blog site for people not ready to host their own blogs and want to have a lot of company while they do…you know….clarks!   

Speaking of rogers, the Progenitor roger launched his own blog, the death-by-Muffin, and being a roger it is taking off by its own damnself. (Remember as a kid building snow forts? And that one time you managed the perfect fort and on that one day, sun was out, cold-as-a-bastard with a steady wind and you sat in the fort looking out, shielded from the wind and the sun seemed actually warm on your face?) Something like, except different. You should go and visit him and leave Comments, which roger will promptly reply to, if you happened to be a scott. (Otherwise hey, you’re a clark…complaining would be…too..risky).   

DS#1 has spent the year working behind the scenes, writing, editing and doing various essential things for the Doctrine. Without her efforts this would be a way different year, which to her credit, she has found the time and energy to keep us on track, even as her own personal timeline continues it’s slow and graceful crash into the sea. Frickin clarks! If they could do for themselves, 1/10th of what they do for others, we…we…probably would lose ourselves the free-labor of one more clark.   

glenn…our little, naughty scott has been a central figure for much of the year, even when he is spending time in the corner (You know, those old ‘Dennis the Menace’ comics, sitting in that cute little rocking chair bitterly complaining to Ruff, “ya know, Ruff when I get bigger I ain’t gonna let anyone do this to me!! frickin frickers, I’ll frickin hit her so hard, it’ll knock her frickin fricks off”) But we enjoy glenn’s irreverent take on the Doctrine and say what you will about ‘one trick ponys’ he do know his country music. And, if you promise not to tell him, I think he is coming along just fine, evolutionarily speaking, that is.   

Phyllis has been quite active in the Doctrine this year, the worst thing that can happen to us, happened to her. Bella, the love of her life died this fall. But as awful as it is to have a loved one die, Phyllis was able to give Bella the perfect day, the perfect death. Accepting this incredibly difficult and painful responsibility, she gave back to Bella what Bella gave to her for 8 plus year, love without reservation, love without a hint of an expectation of pay back. The most amazing thing about that last day was not that everything was done the way that it was, but that Phyllis felt, and therefore gave off the emotion of calmness, acceptance and above all love for Bella. We should all get to die in such a way.   

Joanne (our Mistress of Metrics) was the first of all of us to claim some territory (by Right of Hat). She be the proud owner of what was called Washington DC. Not sure if J. will keep the name or maybe just require the residents to wear hats (on their damn heads) or what. But she did what is necessary to claim the place, sent in a photo of herself and her hat (on top of her damn head) in front of an easily identifiable landscape. That easy! Once she ‘broke the ice’ we had Mel claiming most of his home State, “Michigan”, and DS#1 grabbing Daytona (god bless #3!) and yours truly grabbin a big ole chunk ‘o Texas.   

Mel was in da house!! Our fellow blogger and most of the time role-model, Mel has continued his jeez-why-can’t-I-write-like-that blog, the Spatula in the Wilderness.  He had quite an eventful year, going indie on the blog, learning to run (“ruun, Mel,  ruuun!!!) marathons. And he did this thing while wearing a Wakefield Doctrine hat (on his damn head). We wish Mel and the family unit a good year coming up. ( Mel appears to have traded in the Spatula for a blackberry/blackberry-like PDA…good luck there and remember, just ’cause George Forman seems to be allowed to cook a roast in the living room, does not mean that you should prepare food in your office, yo)   

New Readers came by this year. Friends of AKH, CY and Doug and “mylife=adventure“  (yeah, we shore do gots some funny names ’round here). And don’t want to forget to mention MJ and Ms. Gracemount and Jason ( yo, Jay-son! get that damn blog goin, dude!)   

So, all and all it has been a good year. We have added to this Wakefield Doctrine thing of ours and we have lost parts of it, but I guess that is just how it is with families. 

YouTube Preview Image

Filed Under: Featured Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Maybe I was wrong to ever let you down, but I did what I did before love came to town

November 24, 2010 By 12 Comments

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

As everyone knows we are about to celebrate Thanksgiving here in Oceania. Once a single-day holiday, calendar-creep now has it starting on Wednesday and ending Sunday night (…”man, did you see the traffic on the interstate”?). We will make every effort to keep the Posts coming, even through such a distracting time of year. (This Post is as mixed and confused as the Holiday itself).
Second only to Christmas in it’s demands upon the members (of our) culture, Thanksgiving is shedding it’s historical camouflage and coming into it’s own in terms of proscribed ritual behavior. Of course, Thanksgiving has always laid claim to being a standalone, not-a-hand-me-down, genuine American holiday, unlike those twin imported festivals,  Christmas and Easter. As children we are not only taught the story of  The First Thanksgiving, we even had school-directed Thanksgiving lessons.1  As a result, it is a holiday in which it is relatively simple to know how to act properly and  as such,  is clark-friendly.2 I probably should resurrect/re-post something from the Doctrine archives that deal with the holidays, but hey! it’s Thanksgiving Week!! And we all know what that means!

…it means stress raised to levels otherwise experienced only on Wedding Days, (the day before) major Surgery, asking a girl out for the first time and/or giving birth; all delivered to every single member of your family unit in equal doses:

  • the cook-person (usually the female, but not always) “hey get out of the kitchen, you’re in the way”!/”hey where did everyone go, why do I have to be stuck in the kitchen”?
  • the children “why can’t we go outside, we hardly know those people”!/”I will try to get home at least for dinner, but I have a term paper that has to get laid”
  • the relatives (old) “why I remember when you were just this tall”!/”don’t you remember when we all went to the shore, you were this this tall”
  • the relatives (young) “why can’t we stay home and have dinner”/”there’s nothing on TV, they don’t have any video games at grandma’s house”!
  • the invited friends “hey, you know what would be really exciting“?/”hey, your family are really nice people”!
  • the turkey/the carving/the presenting of the food, “it’s over-cooked I just know I over-cooked it”!/”no, it’s just fine! It’s just that the knife is still too dull”!
  • the desserts “hey, more than one desert at a single meal”!/”what the hell is a ‘Mince’ and why is it in a pie”?

We all know that “the holidays” are experienced differently by each of the three (clarks, scotts and rogers) and therefore the demands of the celebrations are very effective illustration of the nature of each. But if there was no Thanksgiving, a roger would have invented it! (Actually, they probably did). Think about it! A holiday celebration that is:

  • based on a factual historical event (sort of)
  • the protagonists (of the story) are religious refugees, persecuted and driven away together on boats
  • food, specific food and a not-to-be-deviated-from Menu
  • ritual menu and a full schedule of events 
  • shopping in herds, as the climax of the celebration (Black Friday)
  • a moral taught to the young: we came here, those strangers who helped us were different, (…we had a feast and wiped out their culture)

I will be so bold as to suggest that there is no more rogerian a holiday than Thanksgiving!  If there was a St Roger, his feast day would so be in the last week of November.  (Saint Roger; Holy Mother Church’s only self-martyred Martyr. He died at the hands of the original Pilgrims and the Wampanoags;  records in Vatican archives tell us that St Roger’s suggestions throughout the day were accepted with good nature by all in attendance, i.e. “..don’t you think the deer is a little over-cooked”…”pumpkin pie? who would make a pie out of those things?”…”why is that construction-paper Indian’s head all folded”… But, as the story has it, the assembled party reached their limits when he was heard to say, “what do you mean, ‘no turkey’? the best part of the holiday is a cold turkey and pemmican sandwich at around 9:00pm’. His martyrdom is the subject of an up-coming Ken Burns documentary, “St. Roger…when enough is not nearly enough“)

And since we are on the subject of rogers and holidays, is there any human activity that is more one sided, over-hyped, expectations-sure-to-fall short, ( not counting sex on the eve of a relationship breaking up),  than parades? I don’t care if you are a trombone player in the middle of the herd or someone sitting in their living room watching it on TV…you are a roger. (…Someone tell me I’m lying.)

In any event, my own memories of (childhood)  Thanksgivings are all about the walnuts. (Among the several once-a-year foods) a bowl of nuts was put in the living room for the guests but the cool thing was that the nutcracker and those pointy-picking-something-out devices were included. I did not, and still do not like walnuts, but the chance to use the implements was the high point of the day. (…well that little memory-leftover has nothing to do with any of the rest of this trainwreck of a Post, lol)

YouTube Preview Image YouTube Preview Image

1) such as pageants and plays and a whole bunch of shit that we were forced to make out of construction paper (using those rounded scissors and that white-paste-stuff that you could never keep off your fingers) and then the fuckin head of the Indians you so carefully crafted would get folded over and the whole thing still had to go up on the border around the blackboard of the classroom.

2) you really should not need this explained to you…about clarks…and holidays.

Filed Under: Featured, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: , , , , , ,

now that you’ve had your little joke, Mr. Emerson

October 25, 2010 By 5 Comments

“If a man can write a better book, preach a better sermon, or make a better mousetrap, than his neighbor, though he build his house in the woods, the world will make a beaten path to his door.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Well, you know…I gotta say that if Mr. Emerson were sitting here, I might have to challenge him on his pithy little, ‘hey-I’m-so-transcen-splendid’…Ground Control to Major Ralph (…huh, huh…he said ralph… ). Now before anyone says, “who said you have a better mousetrap?”, allow me to retort,

“I said we have a better mousetrap”. Stop reading. Click on google search. Type in ‘personality types’. Hit Enter.   What do you get?

Wait, don’t answer…I’ll show you what you get…(cause you scotts did not do anything I suggested), here is what you get:

About 3,600,000 results (0.12 seconds) 
 

Search Results

  1. The Sixteen Personality Types – High-Level

    Back to The Personality Page · Take the Personality Questionnaire · Information About Personality Types · Portraits of the Personality Types · Personality …
    www.personalitypage.com/high-level.html – Cached – Similar 

  2. Personalitytype – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

    Jump to Types vs. traits‎: Furthermore, because personality test scores usually fall on a bell curve rather than in distinct categories, …
    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Personality_type – Cached – Similar

  3. Four Temperaments – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

    In the ideal personality, the complementary characteristics or warm-cool and …
    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_Temperaments – Cached – Similar
    Show more results from wikipedia.org

  4. Images for personality types

     - Report imagesThank you for the feedback. Report another imagePlease report the offensive image. CancelDone

  5. Personality Types

    Sep 29, 2005 … Personality type theory aims to classify people into distinct CATEGORIES. i.e. this type or that. Personality types are synonymous with …
    wilderdom.com/personality/L6-1PersonalityTypes.html – Cached – Similar

  6. Myers Briggs Personality Test MBTI Personality Types

    A free online personality quiz or test to introduce MBTI Myers Briggs concepts of personality type and cognitive style. Links are provided to many …
    www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html – Cached – Similar

  7. Personality Test and Types (Jungian Psychological Typology)

    Personality test and types information based on the research of Isabel Briggs Myers, Katharine Cook Briggs and Jungian psychological typology.
    www.mypersonality.info/personality-types/ – Cached – Similar

  8. Personality test based on Jung and Briggs Myers typology

    Online test based on Jung and Briggs Myers personality approach provides your type formula, type description, and career choices.
    www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp – Cached – Similar

  9. Personality Types

    Comparison of many different four type personality systems.
    www.2h.com/articles/personality-tests/personality-types.html – Cached – Similar

  10. Personality Types

    Information about personality types, Myers-Briggs personality tests and quizzes and personality profiles from an INTJ.
    www.systemsthinker.com/interests/…/ptypes.shtml – Cached – Similar

  11. Welcome to Personality Type!

    Knowing your type–and learning about the personality types of those around you–can make you happier and more successful in every aspect of your life.
    www.personalitytype.com/ – Cached – Similar

 

 MoreFewer

 
….notice that last entry?…”morefewer”…tell me a clark did not come up with that and they will swear that it is the only word that will do…
 
Point? My Point? You are wondering what all this and Ralph have to do with the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)?
 
I guess my point is that we have not done a good enough job presenting the benefits of our little improved personality/self-understanding/self-improvement/party game mousetrap here. And that is our fault, not yours.
 
So lets start all over again.
 
“Ladies and Gentleman, this is a Wakefield Doctrine”... It is a fun and useful, unique and intriguing, insightful and easy to understand, way to look at the behavior of those people in our lives. With the Wakefield Doctrine, why people act the way they do will finally make sense. With the Wakefield Doctrine you will know more about the other person than they know about themselves. With the Wakefield Doctrine, you and your friend will have hours of fun, at home, at school, at work or just getting about your lives. With the Wakefield Doctrine you will be able to understand yourself in way that will be useful. With the Wakefield Doctrine you can change the things you want to change about yourself and resist the efforts of people who would have you change things about yourself that you would rather not change.
 
In short, the Wakefield Doctrine will make an awful lot of things understandable and put things in a context that you can do something about.
 
And all you have to do is read and imagine. All you have to do is be willing to accept, just for the sake of demonstrating this Doctrine, that everyone you meet today will be living in a reality that might be a little different than yours. All you have to do is be willing to accept that “what you know” might not be the only way. All you have to do is read, understand and have fun.
 
So, for a nearly free hat (for your damn head) who can tell us which our boy Ralph is, a clark or a scott or a roger. (Sorry DownSprings and Progenitors not eligible).
 
YouTube Preview Image
 
 
 
Filed Under: Featured, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: , , , , ,

On Saint John and Paul’s day while the inhabitants were in church, he played his pipe yet again

October 21, 2010 By 6 Comments

Today’s Post title is a reference to the Tale of the Pied Piper of Hamelin….and the question we will pose is, ’which of the major characters are which’?

Pop Quiz!!  Wakefield Doctrine Lesson of the Day-style ( … Oh, Santa Madre del cepillo de dientes! No estoy listo, Jimmy dijo que sólo estaría fuera hasta 10!… )

Close your books, class! This won’t take long, we really need to assess our “progress” in the spreading of the  Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers), thing. 

We all know the story of the Pied Piper of Hamlin, (Town in Europe has problem with rats, a guy turns up and offers to get rid of all the rats for a price, the townsfolk agree and the Piper guy does his thing only to have the townfolks try to stiff the guy, he gets revenge by getting rid of all the kids in town…) now our age-enhanced Readers will recall the version of the story that turned up on “the ‘Television”, back when we were still young and all too impressionable.
Produced for TV by Hallmark Hall of Fame, this version  starred Van Johnson (in dual roles which was cutting edge for the times), Claude Raines (yes, that Claude Raines) and Lori Nelson. These kinds of special-TV-presentations were almost always scheduled for Sunday evenings (the original Family Hour) and was representative of a certain type of “entertainment” that was characteristic of the early years of TV,  the late 50s and early 60s. ‘Good influence entertainment’  produced by the likes of Hallmark and Walt Disney, in actuality, these movies and shows were  all too often so manipulative and contrived that the result was a generation of emotionally scarred children simply because they were forced to watch this stuff  by their culturally insecure parents. Collateral damage in the war for the hearts and minds of the new television generation.  ”You need to get some culture, never mind those trashy comic books and pulp novels, here  at last is a some good quality TV”.  Lets all sit down as a family  and watch: Ole Yella, Bambi, Darby O’Gill and the Little People or maybe the Wizard of Oz. Today’s Post topic, the Hallmark Hall of Fame Presents the Pied Piper (etc) surely produced the sound of relieved parents saying,  ”‘oh look dear, they have that fairy tale, the Pied Piper of Hamelin on Hallmark Theatre, go get the kids”!!  (Old writer to young version of self, “Run!! clark/scott/roger, run, hide somewhere!! You will understand when you get older, now just run”!!)

Ok class, time is up.
I realise that some of you will be ill-equipped to pass this test. After all, today’s Post is geared to those Readers who grew up in the 1950s and early 1960s and, just between you and me, we really, really hope that the demographic of the Wakefield Doctrine readership is not limited to the 40-65 year olds sitting in some office or at home somewhere, waiting for the caffeine to kick in.

….anyway back to our little Pop Quiz.
We all know the story of the Pied Piper, so lets agree there are three main ‘characters’ in the story: the Piper, the Parents and the Children. According to the Wakefield Doctrine, which (group) are best represented as clarks, scotts and rogers….and why is that?

(While we wait for the slower students)…if you are of the target age, try to remember what it was like being young in the late 1950s and 1960s. You would have been between the ages of 5 and 15. Now this is old enough to be curious, perhaps eager to learn about the world  beyond your front yard/your school yard but (still) young enough not to be distracted by the hormonally induced certainty of later adolescence. The perfect time for fairy tales and pop culture morality plays.

Having trouble remembering?  Mr B!! clips please!

YouTube Preview Image

Damn…I forgot myself what this thing was like…sorry this seems to be more of a topic than I was prepared to get into… plus providing a saying that has becomes ironic to a degree way out of proportion to the original context**

Really, class! Pencils down. Times up!

The answer now!   Who was the clark, who was the scott and who was the roger?

…next Post… ole yella, Bambi’s mother…hey Disney!! you suck…why don’t you and your paedophilic buddy Norm* get the hell away from the kids

*Norman Rockwell
** ‘…time to pay the Piper his due

Filed Under: Featured, the Wakefield Doctrine Tagged With: , , , , , ,
« Older Posts

© 2009-2012 the Wakefield Doctrine All Rights Reserved -- Copyright notice by Blog Copyright