Friday or Monday! Friday or Monday! the Wakefield Doctrine ( is it still a costume, if no one thinks you did anything different for the party?)

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers)

‘Finish The Sentence Friday’  is one of three bloghops that we (try to) participate in each Week.  So, today being Friday, it is totally reasonable and understandable that, as I crossed back into the land of  ‘awake people’, who should appear to me but:  Janine and Kate and Stephanie and Kristi?

succubi

I was enthusiastic, as always, in anticipation of writing for today’s prompt, but then as soon as I sat down at the computer, I was, all like,  ‘what the hell! I got nothin!’

Don’t get me wrong, I did participate in Halloween as a child, walking with my friends, up and down the streets of my neighborhood,  asking strangers for candy! And I did wear a costume… really stupid costumes…mostly a ghost, i.e. a sheet or an old pillow case with 2 eye holes and a mouth-hole that instantly got breath-wet and kept moving to the side of my face. This was in the olden days. There were no organized parties (at least in my life), there were no parents in cars waiting at each house, there was just us, brown-paper grocery bag in hand, one flashlight and the expectation of getting through the night and have tales of candy to share with friends at school the next day ( a brief moment of ‘belonging’, my passport being the candy I brought as proof of my successful participation).

But, the trouble this morning was all too simple. I could not imagine an experience in my life from a Halloween that was: a) cleverly funny, b) heart-warming, or c) inadvertently revealing of the events that lead to my present self. Nothin! So, as I often do, I resorted to searching through the Doctrine blog archives, hoping to find a ‘Halloween Post’ that might inspire me.  You can imagine my surprise when I turned up …not a single Post in all  910 Posts of the Wakefield Doctrine!

This, while surprising, immediately become the inspiration that I was hoping for. Knowing that I had not written on this topic before meant the field was wide open! I had a starting point, i.e. the three personality types and Halloween, the rest was easy. Since this is FTSF Halloween and there are four bloggerini, the first thing I did was look for some holiday-centric imagery to ‘jump start’ the creative process,  and it was only natural that I thought … succubi!! In any event, I still don’t have a ‘Sentence Finish’  but I have a cool image and a premise to talk about the Wakefield Doctrine.

The Wakefield Doctrine and Halloween.

While a clark would not be comfortable being the center of attention (and therefore, the object of scrutiny), can there be any doubt that Halloween is ‘the holiday of clarks‘? Don’t believe me? Try this experiment: gather as many people in a room as possible.

  • scott, your problem will be keeping the numbers down(…tell ’em, ‘Hey!! look, this is an experiment, I can’t use all of you but I promise that I will personally abuse/tease/predate each and every on of you sometime today…except those of you who think you really are my friend… I’ll ignore you completely… no, you’re welcome”.)
  • roger, you will immediately anticipate the nature of the experiment, then start to question (pretending to be making a helpful and well-meaning suggestion) whether you want to take a chance on getting everyone in your group upset and disappointed and angry but then you remember that there will be a scott there and you’re all for it.

Gather the group, get their attention and say, “Please raise your hand if you wouldn’t mind being someone else”.

Count hands.

Those are your clarks.

Candy corn anyone?

oh!  yeah!!  Damn!  I almost left out the prompt!!     “One Halloween I …dreamed I was a real person

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clarkscottroger About clarkscottroger
Well, what exactly do you want to know? Whether I am a clark or a scott or roger? If you have to ask, then you need to keep reading the Posts for two reasons: a)to get a clear enough understanding to be able to make the determination of which type I am and 2) to realize that by definition I am all three.* *which is true for you as well, all three...but mostly one

Comments

  1. I love candy corn and would so have some right now. In fact, I bought some at the Dollar Store the other day and have been eating it while no one looks! But seriously, I love Halloween and used to love being able to dress up and now just so much fun to see if through my girls’ eyes. Thanks as always for linking up Clark and Happy (almost) Halloween! :)

  2. christine says:

    No thank you on the candy corn. Yuck.
    As for your image and a premise, I was cracking up. We usually have a Christmas party and a Labor Day party at our house each year. They get ridiculously large, because I can’t decide who NOT to invite. Labor Day includes kids, so there are over 100 people here. At Christmas, we’ve had up to 50 crammed into our house. So, yes, I’d have trouble keeping the numbers down. :)

    • clarkscottroger clarkscottroger says:

      Christine

      thank you for the illustration-opportunity for our little personality theory!

      a scott decides who not to invite (based only on available space, not for any shortage of people wanting to be invited)
      a roger decides who to invite (based on who has offered an invitation to another affair)
      a clark decides to not over react to any invitations… is happy and intimidated to receive the invitation from a scott and is happy but intimidated to receive an invitation from a roger… goes to both is glad about one and disappointed by the other

      lol

      (now if this were any kind of really, really good personality theory, we could tell you what you will wear, if you chose to wear a costume on Halloween!*)

      * some restriction would apply… would need to know a little about the local/cultural milieu that this event was contexted in…

  3. findingninee says:

    Awesome! Perfect way to finish the sentence using Clarks, Scotts, and Rogers! Perfect! I love dressing up for Halloween and some of my best party memories are from this holiday. Of course, I didn’t actually throw the parties, I just managed to somehow get invited.

    • clarkscottroger clarkscottroger says:

      Kristi

      (this works better in realtime, but I like it enough to use it anyway), “well, duh!”

      lol… I am surprised at myself for not doing a Halloween-specific Post (or Posts) before this!

  4. Glad you were able to overcome your lack of inspiration and lend the Doctrine twist to the Halloween theme. I love your concluding sentences. Prior to the candy corn, that is, which is undoubtedly disgusting.

  5. Rich Rumple says:

    I’ve started wondering if we tend to visit all three during various times of our lives. The youthful years tend to bring about a need to go to parties to feel included, the middle years tend to be more organizational, and the later years lean towards the “Who needs parties?” attitude. I’ve never been one to throw parties, as my life has seemingly been extremely busy, but have participated in many. Yet, I’ve always been asked my opinions on the organizational factor. Then again, I’ve always been a homebody, since much of my life has been away from home, either by comedy or management / training obligations. I’ve always had to force myself to attend them, as home seems a better alternative, but have never failed to enjoy them once I’m there. I found that the same in attending concerts in later years. The excitement was dimmed in the beginning by the battle with traffic and parking, as well as the assholes that I knew would always be in attendance. Tis the time of the season, and seasons change (As the Zombies and Expose would sing if they ever decided to do a two group duet). Interesting, my friend, as always!

  6. As a clark, as a kid I too was in it for the candy. Free candy! What a marvelous thing. lol
    As an adult child, I adore candy corn. Once I start,,,,,can’t stop!

    Not once as a child was I ever invited to a Halloween party. When I was in college some friends were throwing a big costume Halloween party. I thought the dressing up was silly so I didn’t.
    I mingled, made the rounds. It wasn’t too long before a guy came up to me and asked me what I came as. “Duh, isn’t it obvious?” I replied, “a girl”.

  7. OHHHHHHH! Clunk!! Do they ignore the clark-friend because they are ‘otherly categorised’ and don’t need putting in a heirarchy?

  8. Yep it’s all about the candy.
    As a Kelly: no candy corn, thank you very much.
    As a Meredith (my 19 year old): please allow candy corn to be available year round. Always.

  9. Jen says:

    Bravo! You are so right! I wish I could post a picture for you here of me being The Good Witch for Halloween a few years back. It’s in my facebook photos…. hmmm. Anyway, way to make this work for you! My son wants me to be a storm trooper this year. I do NOT do masks. Claustrophobic or something…

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