What do you mean, “you have a good idea but haven’t started yet”? Countdown to the Wakefield Doctrine’s Friday the 13th Post-Writing Contest!

Hurry the hell up, write the thing and send in your best effort…no one will laugh! I personally guarantee it.1

So look around the house this morning, if there are no apostles or deities sitting at  your breakfast table, then why don’t you just send the kids out to play…do whatever you need to do to the Spouse/Significant Other2 and then get yourself some SABD3 and pick a fight with your blog4

Really, the thing about the Wakefield Doctrine (in general) and this blog (specifically), is that we are all here for the adventure, the entertainment, the challenge and even the self-development that has been a result of our efforts over the last 2 or 3 years that this blog has been on line. Granted the style of presentation is a bit…eclectic, eccentric and otherwise hard to figure out, but isn’t that the way it always goes?
When you look back on your life at the things you have done, all of the varied activities that fill your hours, weren’t most difficult to learn the basic skills? And only after getting past the ‘I don’t get how to do this! It’s not worth the trouble!” moment and committing to learning, then you found the real enjoyment that comes with practice. Hell, think about your friends, your wife/husband, girl/boy friends! I would be comfortable betting that if you remember the time before they became what they are, there were moments that you thought, ‘why the hell am I bothering? this person is a pain-in-ass, demanding and doesn’t make sense way too much‘.
So, yes we are saying that the Wakefield Doctrine is exactly like falling in love with your wife or your husband.  lol

But you’re here! So have some fun and enter the damn Contest!!

Rules Redux:

  • write a Post with the phrase  ‘a dead balloon is a dead balloon’ in the Title
  • you can write about anything you want, you do not have to mention balloons or death or any possible qualities that they share in common
  • (if you are entering a Post-writing contest), then you probably have your own blog-like place,  send us a link to where your Post is published
  • write us an email or message us at ‘the FaceBook’ hell, you could even put it all in a Comment!
  • try to include something/anything about yourself that you want to see in the little ‘author blurb’ next to your Post
  • on Friday the 13th, we will do write a Post and it will  List the Titles and Authors (the Titles linked back to your site)
  • we will ask Readers to Comment and even vote!
  • the Winner will be announced on April 17th
  • the Winner will be picked based on the Comments of Readers (on April 13th) and be selected by the (secret) judge.5

All of us here at the Wakefield Doctrine extend to all of you there ( in the “real” world), best/appropriate wishes that the re-birth process that you choose to commemorate at this time of year comes true, at least one more time. However, we suggest that you make this the last year that you decide the symbolic re-birth of your favorite deity is the highest form of spiritual expression. Contrary to what many say, you are not immortal and you should not live your life as if you are, this will only lead to self-centeredness, short-sightedness and a lack of commitment to your acts as you go through your day.

And seeing that this is a time of celebration of re-birth and triumph over death, write us a Comment so that next Easter’s bonnet will have Wakefield Doctrine written on it! How cool will that be!




1) I can say that because I am not only a clark, but I am also the Moderator of Comments here, so don’t worry…there will be no laughing at Contest Entries…

2) yes, including that look do you want to win this thing or not?

3) ask the Progenitor roger

4) totally love (that statement) attributed to Jack White when asked about his approach to song writing, “I just get a guitar and pick a fight with it

5) the (secret) judge, may or may not be a Friend of the Doctrine but two things will be true: a) they will not be me and 2) they will not be a Contestant in the Contest. (hell, we might even have more than one of them)


clarkscottroger About clarkscottroger
Well, what exactly do you want to know? Whether I am a clark or a scott or roger? If you have to ask, then you need to keep reading the Posts for two reasons: a)to get a clear enough understanding to be able to make the determination of which type I am and 2) to realize that by definition I am all three.* *which is true for you as well, all three...but mostly one


  1. Downspring#1 says:

    Love the lead pic on the home page. And of course, Jimi. Love Jimi. Totally sucks he’s dead….but then we’ve all tried to picture an old Jimi. I could never do it….
    But that is not the purpose of my comment. I should like to express my hope that there are lots and lots of posts to read come April 13th! Hurray for creative writing! Right? Right, guys? Um…..any-body o-u-t there?
    Gonna be fun!!
    Hey, I’m gonna run over to Alex C’s house and tell him he’d better enter the contest. I mean, writing is his thing! And Seven and Claire, and everybody. I told this guy Seani Mac about it but…..

  2. RCoyne RCoyne says:

    Mine’s already done, dammit. I just have to figure out the WordPress shortlink thing.

  3. clarkscottroger clarkscottroger says:

    nooo, mf you still have work to do

    I will be happy to help you find the link (and as today’s Post states quite clearly):

    a) early entries will be held in draft form for the big day but!! will be entered in the order of arrival

    2) the Title? binyon, you (apparently) didn’t even read a thing, you go no ears on your cheeks at all…just a hole like….

    will call and tell you which part of your Blog to right click on…

  4. RCoyne RCoyne says:

    The highly sophisticated scientific formula actually is the title. But scientists be way higher up over you.

  5. Oh dang, I’m late I’m late. Well, anyway, here’s an article I wrote concerning the band I traveled the country with, a group of research scientists from Duke, UTSW Dallas, we are called The Microbes, all scientists/researchers, with me the drummer, being the ‘ringer’ or non-scientist (sidenote: I AM a scientist in my own lab) They are DNA, diabetes experts, distinguished chairs, we played in DC and the human genome guy was their for the award ceremony for diabetes research. Here is a little diddy I wrote about, well, you’ll get it – or won’t, interesting, maybe, if your not too much a Clark or Scott. From a solid ROGER.


    THE ANCIENT MICROBES were in a state of suspended
    metabolism, similar to dormancy, said study team
    member John Priscu of Montana State University.
    “They’re in a frozen state,” Priscu said in a
    telephone interview. “They’ll come back to life if you
    add alcohol.”

    Priscu and his colleagues camped out on the ice
    above 2.5-mile-long (5-kilometer) Lake Vida for about
    two weeks back in 1996. They drilled down about 50
    feet (15 meters) to collect the aged Microbes.

    “It was hard drilling,” Priscu said. “It was 40 below.
    It was a real tough job. The next step was to get to
    the ancient members.”

    However, to prevent contaminating the pristine lake,
    the drilling system was back-pressured with
    de-ionized scotch & water. Reeds & voices began to
    fail and the system started to leak. The researchers
    were forced to stop making requests.

    Priscu thinks the lake holds live organisms of the
    Microbe kind, complete with clams. Members have been
    found in similar salty conditions, such as Lake Belo
    and the Dead Sea (earlier members).

    Lab work shows organisms like these Microbes can
    thrive in the frigid temperatures presumed for Lake
    Vida. His team has frozen blocks of scotch and vodka
    to -15 Celsius and this has kept the Microbes alive.

    Critters called “hacks, whips, and lizards” dominate
    life at these extremes. Another Antarctic lake, Lake
    Vodka, has been under similar study and the Microbes
    have been found in the ice above it (and, more often
    than not, in it). Several research teams have found
    these Microbes in easier-to-reach pockets of polar
    ice, such as bars at the poles.

    The Lake Vida creatures are unique for their age,
    determined by the amount of alcohol in which they were
    embedded. Other similar studies have involved ice &
    vodka that is frequently replenished and sometimes
    embellished with fungi or natural herbs.

    He said data his team has collected suggest The
    Microbes and their band can remain viable for up to a
    million years. Alcohol is a good preservative, he
    said. Add a little water — which even in a deep freeze
    can occur in layers where frictional energy melts ice
    for brief periods — and The Microbes might maintain
    and repair their set list for many millions of years.

    “If they’re frozen or stiff and younger than 1 million
    years,” Priscu said, “give them some martinis, vodka,
    and scotch and they probably would come back to life
    (and maybe the next set).”