hey, hey we’re the Monkees, We may be comin to your Town

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine (the theory of clarks, scotts and roger)   


You don’t mind if we kinda just set aside the formality a little, do you?
Thanks. Ahh…feels good to type in comic sans after 12 months of Times New Roman, hold on…. hey  HEY!!! yeah!….ECHO…echo…echo… lol

Sorry, always wanted to do that. Today’s Post will be our Christmas letter from those of us here to all of you out there. Been a big year not only for the Doctrine, but for a lot of the Progenitors and DownSprings. Had a lot of fun and aggravation and those things that must happen to all family/hobby groups of people that find themselves drawn together by a common interest.
Speaking of common interests, I have a confession to make. While I write this Post I am also trying to channel my inner roger. I know, I know I should ‘be myself’  and ‘write what I enjoy’ but in the last few Posts the topic of communicating and writing style has surfaced and re-surfaced and no matter what I know is the right thing to do, I still am trying to write in a way that is not,  “self-referential” obscure and arcane.  (damn! did I or did I not just get self-referential with my attempt to not be self-referential?) Fuck it.

So it has been a busy Year around the Doctrine. DownSprings and Progenitors alike have found areas where they could develop new interests, express themselves in new and more creative ways.
Ms. AKH seems to have found her calling in the critical role of Pusher of the Doctrine; we have been without a geek for a number of months and the need to take the Doctrine to a wider audience has never diminished. AKH took it on herself to try and learn what we can do to get this thing in front of as many people as possible. That means a whole bunch of little things that do not necessarily show, links into and around and through the nexus-portico-server-thingie. Anyway, her efforts have been paying off! We have seen visitors from new parts of the world every day. One of the bigger (and sometimes aggravating things) she has done is convince me to write at a place called Hub Pages. It’s kind of a blog site for people not ready to host their own blogs and want to have a lot of company while they do…you know….clarks!

Speaking of rogers, the Progenitor roger launched his own blog, the death-by-Muffin, and being a roger it is taking off by its own damnself. (Remember as a kid building snow forts? And that one time you managed the perfect fort and on that one day, sun was out, cold-as-a-bastard with a steady wind and you sat in the fort looking out, shielded from the wind and the sun seemed actually warm on your face?) Something like, except different. You should go and visit him and leave Comments, which roger will promptly reply to, if you happened to be a scott. (Otherwise hey, you’re a clark…complaining would be…too..risky).   

DS#1 has spent the year working behind the scenes, writing, editing and doing various essential things for the Doctrine. Without her efforts this would be a way different year, which to her credit, she has found the time and energy to keep us on track, even as her own personal timeline continues it’s slow and graceful crash into the sea. Frickin clarks! If they could do for themselves, 1/10th of what they do for others, we…we…probably would lose ourselves the free-labor of one more clark.   

glenn…our little, naughty scott has been a central figure for much of the year, even when he is spending time in the corner (You know, those old ‘Dennis the Menace’ comics, sitting in that cute little rocking chair bitterly complaining to Ruff, “ya know, Ruff when I get bigger I ain’t gonna let anyone do this to me!! frickin frickers, I’ll frickin hit her so hard, it’ll knock her frickin fricks off”) But we enjoy glenn’s irreverent take on the Doctrine and say what you will about ‘one trick ponys’ he do know his country music. And, if you promise not to tell him, I think he is coming along just fine, evolutionarily speaking, that is.   

Phyllis has been quite active in the Doctrine this year, the worst thing that can happen to us, happened to her. Bella, the love of her life died this fall. But as awful as it is to have a loved one die, Phyllis was able to give Bella the perfect day, the perfect death. Accepting this incredibly difficult and painful responsibility, she gave back to Bella what Bella gave to her for 8 plus year, love without reservation, love without a hint of an expectation of pay back. The most amazing thing about that last day was not that everything was done the way that it was, but that Phyllis felt, and therefore gave off the emotion of calmness, acceptance and above all love for Bella. We should all get to die in such a way.   

Joanne (our Mistress of Metrics) was the first of all of us to claim some territory (by Right of Hat). She be the proud owner of what was called Washington DC. Not sure if J. will keep the name or maybe just require the residents to wear hats (on their damn heads) or what. But she did what is necessary to claim the place, sent in a photo of herself and her hat (on top of her damn head) in front of an easily identifiable landscape. That easy! Once she ‘broke the ice’ we had Mel claiming most of his home State, “Michigan”, and DS#1 grabbing Daytona (god bless #3!) and yours truly grabbin a big ole chunk ‘o Texas.   

Mel was in da house!! Our fellow blogger and most of the time role-model, Mel has continued his jeez-why-can’t-I-write-like-that blog, the Spatula in the Wilderness.  He had quite an eventful year, going indie on the blog, learning to run (“ruun, Mel,  ruuun!!!) marathons. And he did this thing while wearing a Wakefield Doctrine hat (on his damn head). We wish Mel and the family unit a good year coming up. ( Mel appears to have traded in the Spatula for a blackberry/blackberry-like PDA…good luck there and remember, just ’cause George Forman seems to be allowed to cook a roast in the living room, does not mean that you should prepare food in your office, yo)   

New Readers came by this year. Friends of AKH, CY and Doug and “mylife=adventure”  (yeah, we shore do gots some funny names ’round here). And don’t want to forget to mention MJ and Ms. Gracemount and Jason ( yo, Jay-son! get that damn blog goin, dude!)   

So, all and all it has been a good year. We have added to this Wakefield Doctrine thing of ours and we have lost parts of it, but I guess that is just how it is with families. 



clarkscottroger About clarkscottroger
Well, what exactly do you want to know? Whether I am a clark or a scott or roger? If you have to ask, then you need to keep reading the Posts for two reasons: a)to get a clear enough understanding to be able to make the determination of which type I am and 2) to realize that by definition I am all three.* *which is true for you as well, all three...but mostly one


  1. phyllis says:

    This post looks a lot like a “Christmas Letter”. Nice job including the all the doctrine “family”.

  2. clarkscottroger clarkscottroger says:

    Yeah, families by choice seem more tolerable than the genetic ones. We are an interesting bunch.

  3. Downspring#1 says:

    “Family by choice”. Nice term. And comforting to know I have this one (at the Wakefield Doctrine)……as I continue my “slow and graceful crash into the sea.” FU bro’.

  4. RCoyne RCoyne says:

    Slow? Graceful?? Crash??? Sea????No!!!
    Death? Muffins??Me???No!!!
    I get the fort thing, though. Absolutely. A perfect window, there. Just until the scotts attacked with snowballs with secret rocks in them. The bastards. And I remember making piles of snowballs the night before to be ready for their treacherous morning attacks, only to find the extra ammo frozen over just when you needed it the most. Although the lumps of jagged ice were effective in an artillery sort of way.
    Speaking of the Little Big Horn, the 7th Cav Guidon sold for 1.9 million at auction the other day.
    George was just a little bit of a roger. Just the teensiest bit.

  5. AKH says:

    I too took it to be a Christmas card (and enjoyed it as such). Happy holidays to everyone! Even you new readers. We know you’re out there. Why not send us a season’s greeting message and tell us why you enjoy the Doctrine. Doesn’t have to be anything elaborate. We invite any and all of you and look forward to hearing from you in the coming New Year!

    *Holidays are not only for the Wakefield Doctrine “family” as it were. The more the merrier!